LifeSucks39

LifeSucks39

Student
Feb 14, 2020
182
I want to ctb because my significant other left me, I have erectile dysfunction meaning I'll never have sex again, I messed up at work and they prolly fire me plus I have depression.
 
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s1mplem3

Arcanist
Mar 4, 2020
454
I live alone whole my life, no family or friends. I have no future, and as you I'll never have sex too. I dont want to spend another half of life like this and end up somewhere in nursing home. Now I have opportunity to end this hell.
 
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TheGoodGuy

TheGoodGuy

Visionary
Aug 27, 2018
2,999
Colorblind
Psoriasis
other skin problems
that requires ointments and treatments
scoliosis
back injury in the middle of my spine
so I will never workout again
Allergies to almost all foods and many other things
Acid Reflux (midlly)
Throat problem being the worst which has ruined my life by ostracizing me.
Calcium deficiency because I am allergic to milk and can´t swallow pills because said throat problem

That was just the physical ones I am sure I forgot some since I have so many problems.

Aspergers
Anxiety

Social anxiety so I can´t even go to the movies because of these problems it stresses me too much out
I have no friends not one, havent had for years
Apathy and Anhedonia so I don´t feel any emotions anymore no happiness, sadness or excitement "life" is bleak I don´t enjoy doing anything and haven´t for like 5-6 years.

And then the biggest reason imo except my throat problem I want to be a child again so bad like you wouldn´t believe so I guess Peter Pan Syndrome as well I feel like I have lived a full life an amazing childhood which basically was heaven on Earth and exciting teenage years, I never wanted wife, kids, grandkids or a job so if life was a videogame I have completed 100% of it and just need to exit the game that is life.
Childhood was paradise on Earth all fun and games no physical problems, mental problems or adult responsibilities life was just an adventure I see no reason to live past childhood because happiness demishes so drastically in puberty although puberty can still be exciting true happiness is for childhood only.
 
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G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,017
Broken heart
 
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gnomeboy17

gnomeboy17

Specialist
Feb 11, 2020
355
I genuinely don't think my life will ever get better. I have severe anxiety and can hardly go out, let alone get a job. My future is not looking good. I am also gay and transgender and don't believe my life can ever be what it should have been.
 
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Why you?

Why you?

All The Bright Places
Nov 22, 2019
32
Wow. Just listening to your problems......I feel like I have no right to want to die.
 
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gnomeboy17

gnomeboy17

Specialist
Feb 11, 2020
355
Wow. Just listening to your problems......I feel like I have no right to want to die.

Pain is relative. Obviously I would not encourage you to ctb but if you feel like your life is that bad you shouldn't feel guilty that some have it worse than you. Best wishes x
 
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katyhere

katyhere

Member
Jan 23, 2020
44
Weltschmerz. I do not belong here.
 
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Lost in a Dream

Lost in a Dream

He/him - Metal head
Feb 22, 2020
1,771
Wow. Just listening to your problems......I feel like I have no right to want to die.

That is how I often feel when people have much longer lists of problems than I do, but the thing is, it's only a matter of time before I (or anyone else) end(s) up with a longer list. One of the reasons that I want to do it is that very possibility.

In my case, depression, anxiety, and a life-long anger problem are the things that initially caused suicide to cross my mind in the first place, but the effects that those things have had on other people have added to it. I've lost friends over stupid shit and my tendency to catastrophize every time I feel stressed about anything (sometimes those fears of bad things happening have proven to be warranted) has shown me that I am not mentally stable enough to function as well as most other people. I also have a hard time trusting people in general, because I have been fooled into trusting manipulative people in the past and ended up being taken advantage of by them, which means that dating is out of the question for me, even though I have a sex drive that makes me want to do it sometimes.

There is also the fact that this world is terrible and I don't have the means to fix it. People with happy and healthy lives are always at risk of having their lives destroyed by natural disasters, being diagnosed with devastating illnesses, and greedy people with more wealth than them deciding that they are expendable and taking away their employment, benefits, and even their home because doing so is profitable. Then there are people who are already miserable because of mental health problems being at risk of these same things. When you already have mental illnesses, those problems that are caused by the world and other people will affect you even worse, which is something that I am always afraid of happening to me.

I am not in immediate danger of homelessness and I don't have any serious physical problems at the moment, which is part of why I am still around, but due to my mental health issues, the longer I live, the more the risk of those things happening will increase. I currently see suicide as a preventative measure, to avoid my life getting worse due to old age, worsening physical health, and decreased mental ability, because I know that I won't be able to survive in this world if those become issues for me. I think I would rather get it over with beforehand, so that I don't end up trapped in a horrible living situation, without having an emergency exit available.
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Reason I want to ctb is because I feel incompetent, have a hard time articulating myself and have bipolar, BPD and anxiety.
 
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Lost in a Dream

Lost in a Dream

He/him - Metal head
Feb 22, 2020
1,771
Reason I want to ctb is because I feel incompetent, have a hard time articulating myself and have bipolar, BPD and anxiety.

I imagine Squilliam being a dick to you every day doesn't help either...

:hug:
 
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Nem

Nem

Drs suck mega ass!
Sep 3, 2018
1,489
Sucker of cocks dr nearly killed me with dangerous meds, ex fiancé demanded I keep taking them and now have kidney, nerve, muscle and brain damage.
Then asshole ex fiancé threatened to break up with me if I sued, saved their life by not ghosting them
Peace/hugs❤️
 
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astro

astro

recovery gang
Dec 19, 2019
89
I want to die because I have schizoaffective disorder. Problem is that before schizoaffective disorder my life was nearly perfect which means any hope of full recovery or anything close to that is making it impossible for me to actually commit suicide. I'm aware that in my situation the chances of recovery are extremely low if existent at all but my therapist throwing around phrases like 'nobody knows what is gonna happen' and telling me I might be able to go to university at some point is keeping my hopes alive, sadly.
 
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I

IHaveNoIdea

Member
Aug 29, 2019
24
I feel overwhelmed 24/7 for no reason. Like in my head is just racing and overwhelm. My brain doesn't work very well. I have neuropathy that is slowly progressing so I'm not going to be able to walk eventually. I have depression. I'm very disabled basically. I can't do much other than sit /lay down all day. Playing video games makes me sick for some reason.

I wish I was older so I could maybe qualify for assisted suicide.
 
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Donk

Donk

Useless since day 1
Jan 3, 2020
1,129
depression, anxiety and anhendonia. i dont have any motivation to do anything. pretty much stay in bed all day. eventually i'll have to go back to the job i hate. my wife would be happy if she was with someone else.
 
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D

Dear Flabby

Please listen to “Across the Universe”
Feb 20, 2020
254
Chronic physical pain x 20 years.
Neuropathy.
Cognitive decline.
PTSD and BPD.
 
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highlyvolatile

highlyvolatile

I don't know anymore.
Feb 14, 2020
278
At this point im tired of life. Theres no where that I can go that brings me comfort. At home I'm just there to help. Memphis was nice but now has no place for me. Nashville isnt great either. When mom passed, i got further into depression. Before not being able to have a job cause of my internship and not having a place to stay all the time also made things hard. My ex left me but fuck him he's moved on so whatever. Im still heartbroken over that and the death of my mom. Since graduating life's been shit. And today alone the stupid fucking uber lady took half my food and my cousin called asking for money right after. The sooner im gone the better for me. Even if nothing awaits me.
 
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