Why do we need to feel that we need to prove ourselves to others?

[Lost Magic]

What is it with society teaching us that we somehow have to prove ourselves (China has a terrifying human points system)? Is having an overpaid job, 5 cars and a house with lots of bedrooms the things we should be striving for? I don't have these things, so am I deemed less worthy of a human being? This world is so pretentious and stupid. Greedier and more opportunistic people get so much more respect for some reason. And by the way we never lost our way because we didn't have our way in the first place. While there are still decent people out there, humans are just largely shit by nature. It just sucks the life out of me tbh. Anyway, I gave up on trying years ago. It's just not worth the effort.

 

[MindFrog]

I feel like it's more of a peer pressure thing rather than just plain wanting more.

We are more afraid of being look down upon and treated as lesser than just having worldly possessions. I know some people who would like a mansion but there's some who be content to live in a small sustainable cottage if possible. But people are pressured to get a car, get a better device, and just plainly be a "better" cos it's required.

Our capitalist society benefits on us being in our most productive state.

The greed's built into the system itself. An upward scale of monetary profit and production that does not consider it's human cogs bleeding out of it's machine.

Heck it's even better if it bleeds so long as it breeds on a faster rate.

 

[Fayefaye]

Societal expectations. If you can't achieve those expectations, you're judged from the outside in, and that teaches us to be ashamed inside out.

I feel like a failure. Interior. I realized recently that when meeting new people I've tended to communicate any of my achievements hoping others might be impressed and see me as a person deserving of respect. I must've looked so desperate! I don't meet new people much now, and if I do, I make an effort to suppress that urge when I am aware of it. I try to tell myself I don't have to prove anything to a stranger.

Still contributes big time to my suicidality.

 

[obafgkm]

I think people, maybe all animals, have a tendency to show off their strengths, in order to avoid fighting. The weak will go away. No fighting needed, win win. Fighting occurs if both think they can win.

Established social circles usually have more subtle ways of telling their status, in manner, language, gesture, honors...

New riches usually show off more directly, in cars, expensive clothes, watches, gold chains, restaurants...

It's a way of saying, I am rich and powerful, you can't fight me, I can hire lawyers, I have bodyguards, I know people in the establishment....

 

[Julgran]

What is it with society teaching us that we somehow have to prove ourselves (China has a terrifying human points system)? Is having an overpaid job, 5 cars and a house with lots of bedrooms the things we should be striving for? I don't have these things, so am I deemed less worthy of a human being? This world is so pretentious and stupid. Greedier and more opportunistic people get so much more respect for some reason. And by the way we never lost our way because we didn't have our way in the first place. While there are still decent people out there, humans are just largely shit by nature. It just sucks the life out of me tbh. Anyway, I gave up on trying years ago. It's just not worth the effort.

This is probably just a modern interpretation of the notion of "kill or be killed". Living creatures will always attempt to gather respect and resources in order to be viewed as "the best".

As for the question of why this is how the world works, I'm not sure, but I guess that nature has pre-programmed us into behaving this way, since the world would be overpopulated otherwise.

 

[KQuotientW]

We all come into the world in the same way and we all leave it the same way. Our shiny trinkets, important pieces of paper, postcodes, status symbols, money (or lack of), are not going with us.

I grew up in working class, middle class and upper middle class environments. I've had friends who lived in government housing and I've had family friends who were millionaires. We all breathe the same air. I also had a culturally diverse upbringing and think racism is epic bullshit. Can't stand it.

No surprises, I've worked in the social work / welfare sector. When I've seen a person experiencing homelessness, whilst I'm often close to skint, myself, I've bought them something to eat and a nice warm drink. Any of us could end up in that situation. My former clients were from all walks of life.

I've also experienced people being completely shit toward me. When my mother was dying (cancer) and I was her carer, my "friends" all disappeared rather than support me. I help others because I know what it's like to be abandoned. However, no one is ever there for me.

 

[whatevs]

Evolution.

 

[Deleted member 847]

We're social animals