yariousvamp
Misanthrope vampire
- Sep 8, 2024
- 21
I know this will probably sound offensive to "normies" or whatever they're called, but I'm sure there's people here that understand how I feel about living for other people and not yourself.
I didn't ask to be born, I was born in a third world islamic shithole in africa and in poverty, woth no dad, no brothers, no enough money to enjoy my teen years like any girl living in a developed country, I literally have 0 reasons to live for MYSELF, every time I think of a reason on why I should continue living, FOR MYSELF, there's none, literally 0.
And when I try to talk to people about this, they all tell me to live for my family, to live for my mother since I'm her only child and widowed and may have nobody take care of her in the future if I were gone, or I'd continue living for my long distant boyfriend from a developed country that has been sending me some money to help me with my poverty and at the same time to save money for the plane ticket. Or to live for my bestfriend that I've known for like 7 years so my death wouldn't hurt all of them. Okay.
But what about ME? what if I have no reason to continue living? What if I don't wanna stay here anymore? What if I'm too tired to continue living in this world and believe thay my life would be way better in another world? Why is the only reasons that people give me to continue living is to just live for other people? It just confirms my point that i have NO reasons to live for myself. People call those that commit suicide selfish for leaving their beloved ones, but what about them? Have you ever gave them ONE reason to live for themselves and not for other people? "Your mother will be hurt, your lover will be hurt, ur friends will be hurt, they'll miss you" like?? Why only guilt trip suicidal people to live for other people when you can't even give them ONE reason to continue living for THEMSELVES??
Even when I try to find reasons to continue living, I always think of other people. How much my death will hurt, or how my mom will be left alone with nobody to take care of her when she's too old, but me? I've yet to find one reason to continue living for MYSELF and not for others, I'm tired.
I didn't ask to be born, I was born in a third world islamic shithole in africa and in poverty, woth no dad, no brothers, no enough money to enjoy my teen years like any girl living in a developed country, I literally have 0 reasons to live for MYSELF, every time I think of a reason on why I should continue living, FOR MYSELF, there's none, literally 0.
And when I try to talk to people about this, they all tell me to live for my family, to live for my mother since I'm her only child and widowed and may have nobody take care of her in the future if I were gone, or I'd continue living for my long distant boyfriend from a developed country that has been sending me some money to help me with my poverty and at the same time to save money for the plane ticket. Or to live for my bestfriend that I've known for like 7 years so my death wouldn't hurt all of them. Okay.
But what about ME? what if I have no reason to continue living? What if I don't wanna stay here anymore? What if I'm too tired to continue living in this world and believe thay my life would be way better in another world? Why is the only reasons that people give me to continue living is to just live for other people? It just confirms my point that i have NO reasons to live for myself. People call those that commit suicide selfish for leaving their beloved ones, but what about them? Have you ever gave them ONE reason to live for themselves and not for other people? "Your mother will be hurt, your lover will be hurt, ur friends will be hurt, they'll miss you" like?? Why only guilt trip suicidal people to live for other people when you can't even give them ONE reason to continue living for THEMSELVES??
Even when I try to find reasons to continue living, I always think of other people. How much my death will hurt, or how my mom will be left alone with nobody to take care of her when she's too old, but me? I've yet to find one reason to continue living for MYSELF and not for others, I'm tired.