S

selfharmaniac

New Member
Mar 25, 2020
4
When i tried drowning myself last year i convinced myself that it was yet another episode of self harm. Why are people afraid of pain while attempting ctb then?
 
Lorntroubles

Lorntroubles

Photography by Haris Nukem.
Jan 19, 2020
3,095
But it isn't. Death leads to the unknown. Dying painfully isn't just a self-harm walk in the park. It's natural in us to not want pain. It's our biological mechanism. Due to life experiences, some people actually think they deserve to die painfully. But painful death isn't just "self-harm" that you can go on the next day.
 
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GoodPersonEffed

GoodPersonEffed

Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
Jan 11, 2020
6,727
Because not everyone who attempts ctb also self-harms.
 
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Soulless_Angel

Soulless_Angel

existence is futile
Jul 10, 2019
2,225
CTB is different to self harm, regardless of pain levels,
CTB is ending your life, people want to leave this world as peacefully as they can after years of pain and torment,
Self harm is about feeling pain for whatever reason, whether it's to bring you back down, whether it's too punish yourself and so on
 
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Pupu

Pupu

Member
Jan 28, 2020
50
Sometimes I feel so awful that I think about selfharming myself. I don't know the reason for it, is it for taking psychological pain away or to punish myself. Or is it just act I wish someone would see and understand my agony in a current moment. I just know, that in extreme frustation I see different scenes in my head how to harm myself. But I don't do it in real, I guess I might not been in that deep pain or I'm just not that kind of person.

So it might not surprise I'm not planning to seek pain while CTB. For me, thoughs of CTB were a way earlier present than thoughs of selfharm. So in my situation I would think they are separate things. Or atleast I think selfharm would've been first in my head and then CTB if they were somehow linked.

I've always wanted as peaceful as possible way out. By CO poisoning, how I would just fall asleep. Before I searched the methods I did imagine myself just closing my eyes and falling in something deep, dark and unknown.

If the suicide is done by impulse, it might be more similar to selfharm, in that current moment you're just desperately seeking a way out of your bad situation. But if you plan to CTB, you spent time to think about it, research and be somewhat rational while investing time for it, I don't think it is anyway close to selfharm.

Sorry for my horrible English.
 
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