Who else knows?

[silligant]

Who else knows about your suicidality? Have you told them?

I feel as though in order to properly recover I have to sort of 'confess' my feelings on the matter to get the treatment ball rolling. I find it a little worrying, though, since 1- it's going to be a very difficult conversation to instigate and explain, 2- if my parents/family don't react a certain way it would probably seal my fate and 3- I'm not even sure I'd like to recover.

How have your parents/family/caregivers reacted upon learning about this? I think that I'd rather die assuming that I was cared for; if I discuss this sort of thing it might reveal what they're really like, but at the same time one of the main things holding me back right now is guilt

 

[whywere]

Well, the 1st attempt landed me in court where I had to fight from getting a long-term commitment in a state run facility. Of course, it is published everywhere that I was in court, public knowledge I guess, and my court record starts with mental illness.

So ya, the whole world knows.

Walter

 

[Treku]

well the first time I tried to ctb I got thrown in a ward for a while so that kinda just told everyone. couldn't do anything abt it at that point.

How have your parents/family/caregivers reacted upon learning about this?

well i know this isn't what u want to hear but it's honest.
my brother is scared of me now bc he doesn't know what I am going to do. my mum doesn't trust me at all and it actually broke my dad. him finding out was the only time I've ever seen him cry and I can see the pain on the rare occasion that he sees my scars.
so overall. not good. they all freaked out and now don't trust me or anything I say.
this doesn't mean not to seek out help. if u think even a little that u want to then you definitely should.

 

[XdragonsoulX]

My family treated me like porcelain after my first attempt that put me in the hospital. Now I'm pretty sure they've given up on me cause they don't ask how I'm doing or even talk to me. Even a few years back when I was completely not okay screaming I was gonna kill myself, my dad didn't take me seriously and has never mentioned it. His solution at that time was to kick me out. So I don't think that they would even care if they knew what I've got planned.

Now my partner and his family would be completely heartbroken if they were to find out, that's where my guilt comes into play

 

[Forever Sleep]

My parents or family don't know. I'm not interested in recovery and I don't think there's anything they could do to help me anyway. I intend to wait for my Dad to go first anyhow, so it just seems kinder if he doesn't know about it at all. The rest of my family are step relations or quite distant from me now.

I have told close friends in the past. Some might suspect but none know how bad it is at the moment. Again- there's nothing they can do. I'd prefer to die without them knowing. That way- they didn't know to try and help rather than them try and help but fail or feel like they knew but didn't do enough. Feels like the lesser of the evils. Plus, I haven't seen these people in 5, 10, 20 years. I'm hoping that distance will also help (them.) If I have the guts to do it even...

 

[silligant]

well i know this isn't what u want to hear but it's honest.
my brother is scared of me now bc he doesn't know what I am going to do. my mum doesn't trust me at all and it actually broke my dad. him finding out was the only time I've ever seen him cry and I can see the pain on the rare occasion that he sees my scars.
so overall. not good. they all freaked out and now don't trust me or anything I say.
this doesn't mean not to seek out help. if u think even a little that u want to then you definitely should.

You have my condolences for all of that... but it is the kind of story I was looking for, thank you very much for telling me.

Regarding seeking help I feel like it is more out of obligation than actual desire, but i will still consider it

 

[FuneralCry]

Nobody does and never will do, my personal feelings towards existence are nothing to do with other people. And we also exist in this society where suicidal people are punished simply for wanting to die by being cruelly locked in psych wards so it sounds like a bad idea being too open in my opinion, I find it so horrible how suicide isn't accepted as a valid option.

 

[Some place nice]

My family knew that I was in high school but they assume that the hospitals "fixed" me. So they dont think that I am anymore or are just ignoring it.

 

[rainbowstagbeetle]

Who else knows about your suicidality? Have you told them?

I feel as though in order to properly recover I have to sort of 'confess' my feelings on the matter to get the treatment ball rolling. I find it a little worrying, though, since 1- it's going to be a very difficult conversation to instigate and explain, 2- if my parents/family don't react a certain way it would probably seal my fate and 3- I'm not even sure I'd like to recover.

How have your parents/family/caregivers reacted upon learning about this? I think that I'd rather die assuming that I was cared for; if I discuss this sort of thing it might reveal what they're really like, but at the same time one of the main things holding me back right now is guilt

my mom and a few friends knew a few years back but i just don't bring it up anymore so they assume i'm better. my dearest friend is struggling a lot so i don't want to put more pressure on him by dumping my feelings.

 

[tiger b]

My best friend has an inkling but noone else, my wife wouldn't understand. I'm actually happy she doesn't.

My actual family only ever cared about themselves anyway, so they can go forth and multiply.

 

[icari]

One other person knows (besides the mental health services at the hospital). I only told him because he asked and also told me about his. I have been debating who else I should disclose the current severity of my situation to, and whether or not to leave suicidality out of it if I do (probably should). I keep reaching the conclusion that it is too selfish to bring others into it.

 

[mob]

I HAD to tell my therapist, psychiatrist and partner about it, or else I would've had to go to work lol. They think I'm doing better now though, but surprise! The antidepressants didn't cure me.

 

[hi-okbye]

when my parents first found out about me being really depressed (not suicidal yet), they kinda just chocked it up to being regular teenage hormones kicking in. as time went by and i became suicidal and stuff, i got more serious therapy for it. they were a bit upset but caring, they just wanted the best for me. a few weeks-months later, i got hospitalized for the first time. i remember my mom crying and just asking me why in the car ride to the hospital. same with my other family members, they tried to keep it light but kept wondering why i wanted to leave. after that i got a lot more serious treatment. it helped for a bit. then for some reason, this one summer everything just went downhill. i got depressed again, attempted, pretty much the same thing. my parents always try to keep it light and want to act cheerful around me, even when i was in the hospital. but when i was knocked out that morning (it was an od on benzo's, slept like a baby), they were crying supposedly. but yea that's how my parents reacted, not to sure about yours but still think you should tell them. they might be able to help out. maybe if you don't feel comfortable, just say you've be feeling really down and depressed, and say you want a therapist to talk to about how you feel.

 

[du2497]

My mother, three people outside of family, one a friend from high school who has an inkling about my depression but nothing specific, one is my therapist, and the third person is from a therapy group I'm no longer in, who I talk to from time to time.

Technically the rest of my family knew when I was last hospitalized, but that was almost a decade ago, I assume they think I'm doing well or something.