Who else is in the horrible position of being generally happy with their life but one thing has just destroyed it?

[s-w]

My gf left me 2 months ago. I finally got a decent job after graduating with a good degree and everything was looking ok but now it's all meaningless because I have nobody anymore. She was everything to me and now she's gone and hates me. I'm so scared and don't want to die but I don't want to live without her.

 

[attheend13]

My gf left me 2 months ago. I finally got a decent job after graduating with a good degree and everything was looking ok but now it's all meaningless because I have nobody anymore. She was everything to me and now she's gone and hates me. I'm so scared and don't want to die but I don't want to live without her.

I'm sorry you feel so alone. If I may though, you are in a rough patch. It will likely pass. Don't make a permanent decision based on temporary emotions. I've been in a depression for a few decades. Every breath is painful. It's people like me who need to ctb. Because it's truly hopeless. I think you're expressing true sorrow but you need time to grieve. 2 months isn't long for that process. I wish you well whatever your choices.

 

[s-w]

I'm sorry you feel so alone. If I may though, you are in a rough patch. It will likely pass. Don't make a permanent decision based on temporary emotions. I've been in a depression for a few decades. Every breath is painful. It's people like me who need to ctb. Because it's truly hopeless. I think you're expressing true sorrow but you need time to grieve. 2 months isn't long for that process. I wish you well whatever your choices.

Thank you. I was always lonely and had suicidal thoughts for years before but we were together for 6 years straight but now I'm back to how I was before. I do completely understand what you mean but I've known her for over 7 years and she's been my best friend that entire time. We were each other's firsts for everything and I even if I could go on without her I don't want to. I don't have any other friends or anything - if it weren't for her I probably would have ctb a long time ago. I am fairly sure I have undiagnosed BPD.

Also I am so sorry about how you feel. I really hope things are able to get better for you one day :(

 

[attheend13]

Thank you. I was always lonely and had suicidal thoughts for years before but we were together for 6 years straight but now I'm back to how I was before. I do completely understand what you mean but I've known her for over 7 years and she's been my best friend that entire time. We were each other's firsts for everything and I even if I could go on without her I don't want to. I don't have any other friends or anything - if it weren't for her I probably would have ctb a long time ago. I am fairly sure I have undiagnosed BPD.

Also I am so sorry about how you feel. I really hope things are able to get better for you one day :(

Please understand I'm not minimizing your pain in any way. I know that losing love is devastating. I'm in a relationship rn and I know he has changed his feelings because I'm a loser and I want to ctb before he kicks me out . Losing the last chance for love is the last straw for me. I was diagnosed with BPD when I was hospitalized for depression. I spent 2 years in psychiatric wards and institutions. In fact it's my cut up arms in the textbooks next to bpd. They took me downstairs and shot pictures didn't even ask me. Lab rats don't have rights or choices.
All I wanted to say was that I know how deeply lonely life is and losing someone you loved so long is just horrible. But your life isn't over. Give yourself time to heal. If you decide after that to ctb, I will only wish you peace on your journey. It took me a long time to be sure. Dozens of failed attempts at ctb and at life. I'm at the end.

 

[mattoman]

Yes, I am as well.

Sorry to hear about what you're going through, I cannot relate, but I don't doubt it being tough.

I'm quite happy with my life, I have a job, friends, a decently caring family. But, I suffer from gambling addiction, it's gotten better, but has gotten me in a lot of debt and most of my paycheck goes to rent and to pay those debts off. It's not really any life. I'm alive, but it sucks that I can't do anything because I've got no money. I know that some might think "it's just money" but it's somewhat important to possess in this society. No one really to blame but myself for putting myself in this situation. It's relatively small thing but it really gets me down and sometimes I have issues buying food. Honestly work is the only place I don't need to think about this, but once I'm off, the anxiety kicks in and it's terrible.

 

[Sophie123]

Meee. I have perfect life, perfect friends , perfect family, perfect pet, hobbies.

The only thing they expect of me was do ok in school/ college .

And I failed a sem soo.
Im gonna miss so much.

I wanna grow up with my bff,
Graduate
Have those small moments with my family
See what my life will be like

But I can't
And it's all my fault

Meee. I have perfect life, perfect friends , perfect family, perfect pet, hobbies.

The only thing they expect of me was do ok in school/ college .

And I failed a sem soo

Im gonna miss so much.

I wanna grow up with my bff,
Graduate
Have those small moments with my family
See what my life will be like

But I can't
And it's all my fault

Meee. I have perfect life, perfect friends , perfect family, perfect pet, hobbies.

The only thing they expect of me was do ok in school/ college .

And I failed a sem soo

Im gonna miss so much.

I wanna grow up with my bff,
Graduate
Have those small moments with my family
See what my life will be like

But I can't
And it's all my fault

Meee. I have perfect life, perfect friends , perfect family, perfect pet, hobbies.

The only thing they expect of me was do ok in school/ college .

And I failed a sem soo

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I suffer from a big failure in life. I would like to live my life and I don't wanna die but the circumstances make me suicidal.