Who do you talk to when you need someone?

[Susannah]

Do you have someone to talk to/ call when things get to hard to handle? I mean like a deal with a friend, therapist or family? Who is the most trustful person for you, and why?

I really miss having access to a helper. I feel too exhausted to help everybody now, but still I say yes. How can I find someone like me (sounds stupid, I know).

Lots of loveS

 

[Manaaja]

I like to talk to the people here, because this forum is the only place where I can freely admit to being suicidal. This place is also one of the only places where I can tell about the issues and feelings I have and get sympathy/empathy.

I'm sorry you don't have a helper anymore. I used to have a personal assistant and I really wish I could still have one, but had to quit after they fired the really good one and hired a really bad one.

I don't have any relatives or "irl friends" with whom I could talk about serious things.

 

[Marktheghost]

No. I've got nobody!

 

[Tegan_sky]

I have no one but my shrink. I see him for about 25 minutes once a month. I need a therapist. I used to have friends I could tell anything to. But they faded away, one died, one I let go of. I write and write and write in a journal, all day long. That's the only way now that I get what I have to say, what I am going through, out of me, is on paper. I have tried and tried to make new friends and get a "support system." But none of them would even return calls. I just tried with another woman, very quickly there were numerous red flags and I let her go. Chasing people and getting unreturned calls, when these people don't even know me, it does a very negative number on my self esteem. However, I forgot about this when I started my reply, there are numerous groups on Zoom that I regularly go to. In some of those Zoom groups I am sharing and saying how I really feel, at least I have those as a place to talk about what's going on. So basically, I have my shrink, my trusty journal, and listening to others and sharing in Zoom groups. And of course, SS. I don't post here so often, but when I have I always know I don't have to shine it on, I can say how down I am, and will get empathy and support.

 

[BeautifulMosaics]

I talk to you lovely people now At my worst and for a long time I had no-one. I did use another forum when I wanted to vent but that was only twice and the lonesome battles far outweighed that.

 

[timf]

There can be times (longer or shorter) where one has to rely on one's own resources. Some survive writing poetry others may attempt keeping a journal that hypothesizes a dialog with their older selves. One problem with isolation is that it can greatly magnify self-focus and amplify negative perspectives.

Communication here even with something like sharing a funny cat video can do wonders to break down isolation.

 

[ghost_]

I like come here and talk. or even just read posts. just knowing someone is on the other side of the screen and im not alone helps sometimes too

 

[OrcWitch]

I am very privileged to have a best friend with an arrangement where we can mutually support each other. I also have/had a therapist but I'm losing willpower and energy to even go. I feel like I got what I needed out of her.

I am also very thankful for all the kind people here who make it possible to dump difficult feelings.

 

[whywere]

For me, I have all the great folks here on SS and that is it. Zero family and zero friends, except all my friends here!

I have a older brother and a younger sister that I have not seen or heard from since 1990, they want nothing to do with me and I live in a city of around 4 million, but I have no friends. I am very liberal, and believe that we are all the same no matter what, and the few that I have run into where I live are racist, homophobic, etc and I will NEVER be around people like that.

That is one of the reasons that I love SS, overall, as all the souls on here are so nice and we are like a huge family.

Walter

 

[TheHatedOne]

I go to the only friend I have left, if he isn';t available to talk at that time? Then I'm fucked. Especially with the loss of another dear friend it's even more difficult.

 

[$nowLeopard]

My older brother, "luckily" he has struggled with mental health and suicide in the past during my age aswell. But I haven't talked to him about CTB yet
I love him so much, without him I would be even more lost in life. He has transformed himself so much and he is my hero.

 

[SuicideBoys93]

I have about two close friends I can rely on. Both I met through my job. It was actually funny because he told me I could tell you deal with mental health struggles. I asked how so? Because I'm dealing with the same shit. I can look at people and sense it. Now we joke about off'ing ourselves daily. Weird coping mechanism.

 

[Fk_life]

No one. I stopped going to a therapist and I've only had the gut to talk about my problems to my mom. She's not much of a help to me and unfortunately for me, I have no friends and a TERRIBLE relationship with the rest of my family members. Only came here to cope, but I hope I find someone who can actually make me happier.

 

[whywere]

No one. I stopped going to a therapist and I've only had the gut to talk about my problems to my mom. She's not much of a help to me and unfortunately for me, I have no friends and a TERRIBLE relationship with the rest of my family members. Only came here to cope, but I hope I find someone who can actually make me happier.

Hi! So happy to have you as a friend here on SS. I too have zero friends and I have zero family. But everyone here on SS is so darn nice, thoughtful and caring that life is so much better for me and hopefully you also.

You are a loving soul, as your post makes that so clear and my wish for you is a life filled with loving and caring folks, like everyone here on SS! and I send you lots of hugs and smiles and sunny days.

We are all in this together and that is one of the strengths of being a member here, as everyone is just the best.

Always my best to you friend,

Walter

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I have a friend who is very involved with AA so she Can handle conversations that are dark And depressing and honest. Other conversations I have to be careful what I say. United States, people generally don't like negativity. At least the people I know.

 

[SoulAsylum]

Sadly, I've never had a single person in which I was able to express my thoughts or feelings in an unfiltered and uncensored way. Those whom I've tried to talk to in this manner have always been met with confusion, rolling eyeballs, or a glazed look like a deer in headlights.

Ironically, it's these same people that constantly come to me for help, advice, or to vent out their frustrations. And all too often, I take the time and energy to listen and share my opinions despite knowing it won't be reciprocated or appreciated.

Being empathetic/sympathetic has often been at the expense of my own wellbeing because even though they (hopefully) aren't intentionally being selfish or inconsiderate, and are likely unaware of it, does result in me feeling unappreciated, disappointed, and frustrated.

As a result, not a single soul I know IRL has any clue to my growing thoughts of ctb.

You can't help everybody. And not everybody you help will appreciate your efforts. The rule I've recently established for myself is to stop helping people who aren't at least willing to listen whenever I have things I want to share with them. I don't mind or expect them to have advice or be able to relate to what I'm going through. But they at least have to be willing to listen…really listen to what I have to say and let me know that their shoulders are there for me as much as my shoulders are there for them.

It's okay to keep the welcome mat outside of your door. Just make sure you don't become one.

 

[wanttogetonthebus]

Do you have someone to talk to/ call when things get to hard to handle? I mean like a deal with a friend, therapist or family? Who is the most trustful person for you, and why?

I really miss having access to a helper. I feel too exhausted to help everybody now, but still I say yes. How can I find someone like me (sounds stupid, I know).

Lots of loveS

The people here. Nobody else could possibly understand that the depth of my pain is great, that I consider CBT as viable and rational option for myself.

 

[forgotten15]

I have nobody to talk to. At most I write my thoughts here, but other than this I keep everything to myself. No one knows what I am going through and I think it's for the better, nowadays you can't really trust anyone. Plus, even if I talked about my suffering with someone it wouldn't help because at the end of the day I know no one can save me from this.

 

[callme]

No. I've got nobody!

They're afraid you may eat them

 

[luten]

I had a good friend who died in 2018. He was a paraplegic, and thus had insight of what it is like to have a very restrictive life. I visited him a lot, and we almost talked on a daily basis on IM. We were friends for 18 years ! Then I got back from a holiday, and I found out he died. My life never been the same ever since. I can recall conversations with myself, asking what would I do if he died? Three years later, and here we are.

It is always good to have someone to talk to.

 

[stellabelle]

Just here.
It's pointless.
When people ignore what you're saying or just push push push you despite you explaining why you need space or how you're feeling, it becomes a problem.

You get so tired of the same redundant shit. The same jealous people. The same losers, the same liars, the same thieves. Stalkers.

Work harder. Try harder. Yeah, I did all of that. My life had just crumbled because of it. I should've hung up on my mother years ago and she continued her little fucking "game."

It wasn't a game.

She's dead now.

And then the family members that created more problems. The crappy roommate or the crappy landlord or crappy employer or the crappy public or the crappy police or crappy whoever. Who fucking cares at this point?

Nobody.

Here, go to a therapist and spill it.

Ok done.

It still doesn't make my life any better. It didn't allow me to get or be where I wanted to be or allow me to become what I wanted to be.

I could not shake that fucking problem.

 

[StarryStarry]

I talk to the people on this site. They are the only people who understand and don't judge me - whether I'm pissed off or ranting and raving. To have someone understand how I feel means everything to me. I also talk to my cat, but I think I am depressing her too.

 

[luten]

I talk to the people on this site. They are the only people who understand and don't judge me - whether I'm pissed off or ranting and raving. To have someone understand how I feel means everything to me. I also talk to my cat, but I think I am depressing her too.

sorry to tell you this, but your cat only knows one thing about you - which is that you are part of a non-superior species, basically - not good for nothing. If you tell your cat "i am such a failure" your cat will think something among the lines of "yeah right, and you only finding this out now?..." Cats do not think much about humans. It is better to talk to a different animal, such as an elephant, who is way more compassionate and sensitive

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Not really. Not about this particular subject. I have befriended people on this site, but, it hasn't worked out well and frankly, I am very leary of befriending anyone else here. It's not meant as an affront to ya all, I just don't want to be vulnerable again and get hurt in the end. Too much of that in my lifetime. Especially this year.

 

[StarryStarry]

sorry to tell you this, but your cat only knows one thing about you - which is that you are part of a non-superior species, basically - not good for nothing. If you tell your cat "i am such a failure" your cat will think something among the lines of "yeah right, and you only finding this out now?..." Cats do not think much about humans. It is better to talk to a different animal, such as an elephant, who is way more compassionate and sensitive

I won't tell my girl what you said, it would hurt her feelings. Believe me she has more empathy and compassion than 99% of the people walking around.

 

[PTSDPigeon]

you could hole yourself up in your room, drink yourself stupid and vent to yourself? j/k. then you'd be labeled "schiz". even if you are following the law - venting about unlawful abuse.

i have!

i suppose that is a bad idea.

therapists hsve been nothing but evil to me.

i found a nice pen-pal here. i have a friend who completed suicide who listened to me.

ppl gaslight me when i talk to them. i stopped bothering. the gaslighting is worse than the dv, sex sbuse, ANYTHING. The mental cruelty is BY FAR WORSE than a black eye or rape. it's life ending violence to have your mind played with. the sarcasm.. reactions to murderous abuse with annoyance at being asked for help got old. told "it didn't happen".

i cut myself off from others, bored with their attitude and values. i don't enjoy fascists. i feel housed by hitler/ariel castro/jim jones/heaven's gate and buried alive in a death by words, alone. and denial.

I hated organized religion and felt stalked, harassed and sexually abused - even by the women. It (offices, gyms, personal space environment) felt like a place where I was being groomed, brainwashed and threatened. Kind of like living at an FLDS compound where Warren Jeffs was leading women into suicide who don't want a "husband" or a nuclear life. It was so intense I lost it at work - in my cubicle. I felt oppressed, cornered, beat over the skull to submit and surrounded by terrorists in prim and proper dresses.

Nobody was worth communicating with, at all. Too narrow minded and offended that you don't "do as they do". No concept of how to live and let live or let women live automously, without a keeper running them financially, religiously or why women who don't have babies and "love" are even breating?!?!?! Who does those things? What kind of woman?

i don't bother with people. they're useless. USELESS. We have NOTHING at ALL in common. NOTHING.

i had a pet before. I'd get a golden retriever, screaming husky or other needy, sweet companion animal if i could be a good dog mom. too dangerous to myself. too many incidents of self-harm. i can't hurt my pet while i self-harm, forget walks, lock it in a room with me.

 

[stellabelle]

you could hole yourself up in your room, drink yourself stupid and vent to yourself? j/k. then you'd be labeled "schiz". even if you are following the law - venting about unlawful abuse.

i have!

i suppose that is a bad idea.

therapists hsve been nothing but evil to me.

i found a nice pen-pal here. i have a friend who completed suicide who listened to me.

ppl gaslight me when i talk to them. i stopped bothering. the gaslighting is worse than the dv, sex sbuse, ANYTHING. The mental cruelty is BY FAR WORSE than a black eye or rape. it's life ending violence to have your mind played with. the sarcasm.. reactions to murderous abuse with annoyance at being asked for help got old. told "it didn't happen".

i cut myself off from others, bored with their attitude and values. i don't enjoy fascists. i feel housed by hitler/ariel castro/jim jones/heaven's gate and buried alive in a death by words, alone. and denial.

i don't bother with people. they're useless.

i had a pet, I'd get a golden retriever of other companion animal if i could be a good dog mom. too dangerous to myself.

People enjoy making one another miserable and then lie about it.
It's sickening.
People don't realize how awful things are or can be.
You're right. Twisting every word to fit whatever agenda, just to be a fucking piece of shit.
Or finding other ways to torment a person.
Tell me all about you! Oh okay. I'll do this, I'll do that, I'll just do whatever it takes to make you miserable and push you over the edge.

People know what they do. They know it's wrong. If they're not abusing this way, they abuse another way.

 

[PTSDPigeon]

People enjoy making one another miserable and then lie about it.
It's sickening.
People don't realize how awful things are or can be.
You're right. Twisting every word to fit whatever agenda, just to be a fucking piece of shit.
Or finding other ways to torment a person.
Tell me all about you! Oh okay. I'll do this, I'll do that, I'll just do whatever it takes to make you miserable and push you over the edge.

People know what they do. They know it's wrong. If they're not abusing this way, they abuse another way.

mental torture is EVIL.

I have had my mind played with to the point that I had no option but self-harm. Driving a person insane (intentionally) causing suicide is a manslaughter or murder charge. "Dimming the lights", (have had power cut on my home, computer remotely accessed, hard drive destroyed, registry edited with NO SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE message instead of OS splash screen, pinhole cameras)- all from "loved ones" who struggled with control.

It drove me into suicide.

Of course thru all of this I was "delusional".

When I see a man confess to murder, hibrystophiles feel compassion. offenders on a list are treated as the victim and women shamed.

Well, that is why I Do NOT BOTHER WITH OTHERS AND NEVER WILL, AGAIN.

 

[StarryStarry]

you could hole yourself up in your room, drink yourself stupid and vent to yourself? j/k. then you'd be labeled "schiz". even if you are following the law - venting about unlawful abuse.

i have!

i suppose that is a bad idea.

therapists hsve been nothing but evil to me.

i found a nice pen-pal here. i have a friend who completed suicide who listened to me.

ppl gaslight me when i talk to them. i stopped bothering. the gaslighting is worse than the dv, sex sbuse, ANYTHING. The mental cruelty is BY FAR WORSE than a black eye or rape. it's life ending violence to have your mind played with. the sarcasm.. reactions to murderous abuse with annoyance at being asked for help got old. told "it didn't happen".

i cut myself off from others, bored with their attitude and values. i don't enjoy fascists. i feel housed by hitler/ariel castro/jim jones/heaven's gate and buried alive in a death by words, alone. and denial.

i don't bother with people. they're useless.

i had a pet before. I'd get a golden retriever, screaming husky or other needy, sweet companion animal if i could be a good dog mom. too dangerous to myself. too many incidents of self-harm. i can't hurt my pet while i self-harm, forget walks, lock it in a room with me.

I agree. I think mental/emotional abuse is far worse than physical abuse. Had both - would rather have the physical abuse.

 

[PTSDPigeon]

me2!! heals without much. experienced both. mental cruelty causes / keeps people in a permanent state of dependency, anguish, brain fog, isolation, helplessness, mental jail, suicidal. feels like razorblades across the brain.