When you get to know someone suicidal, how do you feel in the aftermath of their suicide?

[deflagrat]

I met one person in SS a few months ago. She told me that she was planning to kill herself. I listened to her and tried to comfort her every day. It didn't look like her life was that bad but every person has a different limit. She wasn't poor, it didn't look like she had no future, and she had a boyfriend.

At first, she was trying to do it by hanging, but she was unsuccessful. It seemed like I was able to calm her down for a while. But eventually she found SN and decided to try to kill herself in a hotel. I tried to convince her to wait longer to no avail. She hasn't connected to whats-app since then, which is quite the red flag because she told me she wouldn't block me. She was 33.

I don't know how to feel about this. I wanted to know if there are other people in my same situation.

 

[erehbus]

Two good friends suicided thoughout my life. I used to think "what could I have done", but now, being here, I understand that the answer sometimes is "nothing". I really don't feel sad for them, but it is hard not to feel sad for their family.

 

[JimFord99]

It is always a sad moment if you witness someone close to die. There were a couple of individuals who were once members of the forum and died and they where close to me, not in person but the chats we had. Not wanting to name them right now, but it is very emotional to see them go.

 

[Lady black]

I´m happy for them if they reached their goal

 

[JimFord99]

I´m happy for them if they reached their goal

Yeah, of course, but I seem to get attached to them fairly easy. As always, two sides of the coin.

 

[CyanideSoup]

I lost a very close friend a year ago to suicide and its a very hard thing to take in. I don't think that the pain will ever go away but I know she is in a better place now and all I can do is hope that she is happy. Its completely okay to feel upset, even if you want to Ctb yourself. I hope that both you and your friend can find your peace, however that may be for you both.

 

[Aonewayticketplease]

My next door neighbour 2 years ago. He was one of the nicest and most generous men I have ever met.

He started telling me that he was going to die soon a few weeks before he committed suicide, I was with my Mom at the time who interrupted him and said that he shouldn't talk like that. I'm still really annoyed with her for not letting him finish what he was saying. He was considerate enough that he didn't even commit suicide in his own house so as not to inconvenience anyone nearby, he took an Uber to the local flea bag hotel to CTB from their station.

It still affects me today and even though I was good to him I wish that I had taken a bit more time to chat to him. Even though I don't live there any more I miss seeing him tending to his garden in his oversized yellow t-shirt. It infuriates me that I couldn't help him and nobody else seemed to care enough to even thank him for the effort he put into keeping the neighbourhood clean and tidy. His name was Cobus.

 

[Stan]

I think someone passing is always sad. Looking at your story, for me its the not knowing whether they did or didn't. I know I block my whatsapp to prevent people knowing if I am online and does not show the last time I was active. But if she had the drive and determination then i hope she found her peace. We cannot determine what demons are in someone's head by the way they present themselves or have the components to make a happy life. Just look at the number of famous and rich people that have taken their choice.

 

[Rachel74]

I feel sad but also peace for them if they've wanted this a long time x

 

[drake4871]

I just think about how strong they are to have been able to CTB and then it's like if they were that strong they'll be fine wherever they end up.

 

[darkworld15]

I've only known people I met a few times who killed themselves and it affected me even though I didn't really know them. One was a guy that came by our office sometimes and was so nice and good humored I liked him right away. I still remember him 20 years later and feel a bit of sadness wondering why he was suffering so much.

 

[Sweet emotion]

My friend who had the same condition I do which is Complex Regional Pain Syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history, killed herself three years ago at age 31. We were the same age. Of course I missed her but I was happy that she wasn't in pain and misery anymore. I'm happy to know she is somewhere where that pain can't touch her. She is free. We never got to meet in person even though we only lived a couple towns away because we were in so much pain. And even though we knew each other for a little over a month, being the same age and in the same situation bonded us like no one I've ever bonded with. I still think about her every day and I pray to her to give me the strength to do it. I know this is going to be my last year on this Earth. Maybe even my last month. But she was so brave. Her problem was strictly physical like mine. Sure it brings on depression and anxiety but if we didn't have crps she wouldn't have killed herself and I wouldn't be going to. So you can imagine how painful it is.

 

[BPD_LE]

I feel really sad that it had to come to that. But I'm also glad that they are out of pain. It shouldn't be this way.

 

[PDAnnie2610]

Grieve and move on. Especially since that's what my best mate who CTB would have wanted for me.

 

[NegativeSymptoms]

It is sad but I envy them.

 

[BehindTheWall]

My bestfriend commit suicide in May, he was only 23 and his death destroyed me.
I'm not mad at him, not at all. I accepted his choice but I miss him so so much.

I'Il join him soon.