What would you say to your abuser?

[venin]

I know a bit about this "field" from therapy but I didn't do it until now and I would like to do it with you guys.

Maybe we vent, maybe we relate, maybe we don't feel that lonely anymore in our suffering, maybe this will be incredibly healing. I sure hope so.

What would you tell the person who hurt you the most? Or what would you do to him\her? What do you wish happened to them?

Let's get some stones off our chests, blow some steam.

 

[Marine]

I don't know if that'll be helpful but I'll give it a try :

"Enjoy your karma. If you think you can get away with harming someone without consequences, think again. Also you won't end me like this. That's not happening."

 

[FindingHome]

I don't consider anyone an abuser to me. I went through trauma in my life because of other people. It's one of the main reasons why I am CTB. I hope that the people that did the unspeakable things to me will one day meet their fate and the same pain that they cause me they will feel. Their is no forgiveness on certain evils that people cause other people cause. I let go and forgive most things in my life but what happened to me was not OK and will never be OK.

I don't know if that'll be helpful but I'll give it a try :

"Enjoy your karma. If you think you can get away with harming someone without consequences, think again. Also you won't end me like this. That's not happening."

I like the attitude you have about "you won't end me like this." I feel like what happened to me is the end of me.

I don't know if that'll be helpful but I'll give it a try :

"Enjoy your karma. If you think you can get away with harming someone without consequences, think again. Also you won't end me like this. That's not happening."

I like the attitude you have about "you won't end me like this." I feel like what happened to me is the end of me.

 

[venin]

I don't know if that'll be helpful but I'll give it a try :

"Enjoy your karma. If you think you can get away with harming someone without consequences, think again. Also you won't end me like this. That's not happening."

Tbh I liked the "you won't end me like this" part a lot

 

[StolenLife]

I don't want to say anything to them. They have no idea how much they fucked me up and maybe even enjoy that fact. I just want to be left alone for good.

 

[venin]

I don't consider anyone an abuser to me. I went through trauma in my life because of other people. It's one of the main reasons why I am CTB. I hope that the people that did the unspeakable things to me will one day meet their fate and the same pain that they cause me they will feel. Their is no forgiveness on certain evils that people cause other people cause. I let go and forgive most things in my life but what happened to me was not OK and will never be OK.

I like the attitude you have about "you won't end me like this." I feel like what happened to me is the end of me.

I like the attitude you have about "you won't end me like this." I feel like what happened to me is the end of me.

None of the things I've heard here was. What happened to me was and still is pure hell.

I don't want to say anything to them. They have no idea how much they fucked me up and maybe even enjoy that fact. I just want to be left alone for good.

Or if they know, they simply don't give a fuck

 

[bloodblacknothing]

i've already said everything that could be said to them, and it didn't do me any good. if you can look into someone's eyes while you beat and berate them for years, then you are beyond words and reason, and far from human. part of me hopes they lose everything, wrap their car around a pole, and end up in a vegetative state until they die -- but, none of that would fix anything.

mostly, i just want to forget.

 

[Rational man]

I wrote an email to myself with words that were unspeakable to repeat here. However, I disowned my family including my Mother and Brother, both narcs. My Mother has since died of cancer in the most awful way. But despite the torture I endured and the bullies, I have found some kind of forgiveness and a little peace in myself because I could never move on if I hold the pain that my narc family inflicted on me. I strongly believe in karma, so theres nothing for me to do. I live and die in the best way possible but my family are in pain. My Brother apparently is a vindictive narc bitch who uses any opportunity to belittle people online. It occured to me that my familiy were incapable of unconditional loving anyone and inflicted pain on anyone in the firing -line. So in a strange way, Ive broken this curse. Im sorry to hear the dreadful stories here but life can be cruel.

 

[Takamagahara]

"If you thought that I deserved to be with someone better, then why couldn't you be better?"

 

[AntHills]

I'm stuck between dying without a word, and contacting every single one of them so I can say what I want to say, but I'm still trying to decide what (if any) good could come of doing that. I don't want to hurt anybody else for as long as I live, including the people that abused me, because all of them were victims at one point in their life. But people can't change if the problem is never addressed, and a small part of me wants the world to be a better place.

As for all of the pedophilic abuse that me and my family have suffered through, I don't think I can ever forgive that. It has destroyed my life and fucked my mind up. The number of pedophiles that exist in the world is actually astounding, so I'll just say this much; If you have ever had a singular pedophilic notion or feeling in your life and you don't want to CTB, get help and be honest with the people around you. The moment you become a child molester is the moment you relinquish your humanity. Sexual assault is the most traumatizing and life ruining thing that a child can go through.

 

[Rational man]

I'm stuck between dying without a word, and contacting every single one of them so I can say what I want to say, but I'm still trying to decide what (if any) good could come of doing that. I don't want to hurt anybody else for as long as I live, including the people that abused me, because all of them were victims at one point in their life. But people can't change if the problem is never addressed, and a small part of me wants the world to be a better place.

As for all of the pedophilic abuse that me and my family have suffered through, I don't think I can ever forgive that. It has destroyed my life and fucked my mind up. The number of pedophiles that exist in the world is actually astounding, so I'll just say this much; If you have ever had a singular pedophilic notion or feeling in your life and you don't want to CTB, get help and be honest with the people around you. The moment you become a child molester is the moment you relinquish your humanity. Sexual assault is the most traumatizing and life ruining thing that a child can go through.

Such a profound post. Thankyou for sharing. I think I really sense the pain you have been through.

 

[Forever Sleep]

'I envy the people that have never met you.'

I read that somewhere the other day and thought it was very apt. But no- the ideal for me would be to never ever see them again to say anything to. Honestly- I'd rather die than see them again. Besides- I doubt they'd give me the chance to speak. They'd no doubt say something nasty first!

 

[John Ryder]

'I envy the people that have never met you.'

That has to be from a movie, too perfect

 

[Forever Sleep]

That has to be from a movie, too perfect

Yeah maybe. I very much approve of your profile pic and movie choice by the way. I love Rutger Hauer and 'The Hitcher' was a crazy but good film.

 

[John Ryder]

Yeah maybe. I very much approve of your profile pic and movie choice by the way. I love Rutger Hauer and 'The Hitcher' was a crazy but good film.

Christopher Nolan thinks so! It was very validating to find out. Like who can argue now lol

 

[Forever Sleep]

Christopher Nolan thinks so! It was very validating to find out. Like who can argue now lol

Oh cool. I didn't know that. I love Christopher Nolan's films. I think maybe Memento is my favourite. So clever. Sorry OP for derailing!

 

[John Ryder]

Sorry OP for derailing!

Yes, same haha

 

[Gaga786]

"Why me?"

 

[venin]

"Why me?"

I would ask God that, if he would exist ofc

Yes, same haha

Nothing official here. Bonding is more than welcome @Forever Sleep

'I envy the people that have never met you.'

I read that somewhere the other day and thought it was very apt. But no- the ideal for me would be to never ever see them again to say anything to. Honestly- I'd rather die than see them again. Besides- I doubt they'd give me the chance to speak. They'd no doubt say something nasty first!

That's very true. The last part

The quote is mindblowing ty

I'm stuck between dying without a word, and contacting every single one of them so I can say what I want to say, but I'm still trying to decide what (if any) good could come of doing that. I don't want to hurt anybody else for as long as I live, including the people that abused me, because all of them were victims at one point in their life. But people can't change if the problem is never addressed, and a small part of me wants the world to be a better place.

As for all of the pedophilic abuse that me and my family have suffered through, I don't think I can ever forgive that. It has destroyed my life and fucked my mind up. The number of pedophiles that exist in the world is actually astounding, so I'll just say this much; If you have ever had a singular pedophilic notion or feeling in your life and you don't want to CTB, get help and be honest with the people around you. The moment you become a child molester is the moment you relinquish your humanity. Sexual assault is the most traumatizing and life ruining thing that a child can go through.

I'm sorry you endured that kind of hell. I always thought sexual abuse is the worst.
I was abused in every way possible, but sexually I don't remember. Even though somewhere in my mind I feel something did happen. I feel I really really hate my mom, despise her, and it's somehow sexully related. I can't explain it even to myself but something's not right there.

My father has abused me in the most gruesome ways physically, emotionally, mentally, yet I still feel I hate her in a more powerful way… I don't fucking know man.

Such a profound post. Thankyou for sharing. I think I really sense the pain you have been through.

Yeap, profound invididual with a high sense of morality and empathy in spite of everything.

"If you thought that I deserved to be with someone better, then why couldn't you be better?"

Beautiful, sad, deep. I'm sorry

 

[dyingslowly]

I know a bit about this "field" from therapy but I didn't do it until now and I would like to do it with you guys.

Maybe we vent, maybe we relate, maybe we don't feel that lonely anymore in our suffering, maybe this will be incredibly healing. I sure hope so.

What would you tell the person who hurt you the most? Or what would you do to him\her? What do you wish happened to them?

Let's get some stones off our chests, blow some steam.

I really really hope u live long enough to get abused and be alone in a old home where u pray that death comes to you.

 

[venin]

I really really hope u live long enough to get abused and be alone in a old home where u pray that death comes to you.

Nice

 

[ultrasharpy123456]

Abusers because most of my abuse is verbal (it comes from people yelling at me.)
Anyway I'd tell them they're neurotic psychopaths that need to fucking relax.

 

[NancyVicious]

Part of me also doesnt want to leave hate filled notes because I want my final words to be full of kindness and love for the children I'll be leaving behind rather than giving too much to the people who have made me hurt.

The people who have abused me will either not care what they contributed towards my despair because they are cruel humans who don't care about the impact their actions have. OR if they do deep down understand that their actions played a part, that's for them to wrestle with their conscience. I don't want to go down throwing blame out in all directions.

With the exception of one. I anonymously reported my rape to crimewatch years ago, many years after the crime. I was never brave enough to report it normally for fear of not being believed due to him being a well known businessman. I will leave a detailed statement to police on my death.

I suppose if I could say anything to the others, which I won't, it would be 'I hope you realise the hurt you caused with your actions and don't ever treat anyone else that way'