Thanks for asking this - it's helped me draft it......I'm going to set up a legacy contact, and ask them to post a final message after I CTB, once close people are informed directly.
It definitely needs editing - I am always a bit long winded!
I know it's long - if you have the time to read it, gentle comments appreciated. Including any way I can stronger speak for assisted dying and euthanasia:
Goodbye message from me:
If you're reading this, I have gone and I write this with love and good wishes for all of you reading. I wish you all happiness.
I've been quite public about how much I've been suffering now for a number of years. This ending is my long-considered choice, as nothing has helped ease this suffering. I am relieved. Or at least I hope I am.
The illness I have suffered from my whole life has become too much to bear. After months and years of suffering, I have made my final choice. I strongly believe as a grown adult of [insert age] I have the right to make my own decision, and I wish for everyone the right to choose when they die. I believe this is part of a compassionate society, which would not force people to suffer against their will and would give them the chance to say goodbye to loved ones and friends and be respected in their decision.
Many people attempt suicide only to seriously injure themselve. This is a product of our society that does not permit people the space to make their own decisions. I have been researching my method for many years, to ensure it is effective. This is a privilege of my education and resources and not everyone is so lucky. In addition, many attempts are in desperation, because people are suffering so much, they don't know what to do. We could end that - the peope jumping in front of trains etc, if we simply had a humane policy on assisted dying and euthanasia. Believe me, if you are experiencing severe mental illness for which treatment brings no or little relief, you would understand that this is suffering, as much as any pain or other illness.
I am not blaming anyone for this - it is entirely my choice, and in my opinion it is genetic, as are many mental illnesses. I have tried many treatments to no avail. On my website, I have put evidence for mental illness being often genetic (as well as linked to trauma). Often, people do not understand depression, but the depressed brain is different.
For me, mental illness has been like cancer, only without an end date in sight. I wish it did have an end date, and I have therefore chosen to end this suffering. I have endured it and suffered it for many years, and it is getting worse all the time, and my life becoming more ruined by it every day. The people who know me closely know I have been suffering for many many years. I have constant suicidal thoughts, anxiety and fear, as well as misery. I don't want to put the people I love through this, and have isolated myself more and more. I also no longer want to put myself through this suffering.
I have spent a long time enduring this, not wanting to hurt members of my family, but there are only so many years of this I can take.
If anyone wants to see the extent of this daily suffering, the medications, plant medicines, supplements I have tried - see this website. have also put photos up from my life there, and maybe some stories from happier days, as well as links to death positive sites. [this I am going to create, but I haven't done it yet].
Thank you - those of you I know a little or a lot, for the memories, experiences. Of course, I have written letters/emails for my closest people.
If you have any particular memories of me you'd like to share, or words you'd like to send to my family, particularly my mum, who I'm sure will appreciate messages of sympathy - you are welcome to post them here or email them to [insert email address] and they will be passed on.