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cosmic-realism

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Sep 7, 2024
48
I missed the date to catch the bus by ctb.


This acquaintance I know,began to act too friendly and borderline flirtatious..this is the first time someone ever acted this way towards me.Now I am hyperfixated on this,dodging my troubles and everything.I have dissociated entirely without really dissociating.

How do I come out of this and get this roadblock out of my head?Any advice will be greatly appreciated.
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
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I guess it depends on whether you think that- if you could have a relationship with them, whether that would turn your life around. But then, would you allow them the risk of getting involved with someone who is suicidal? But, if you have any interest in pursuing it, then I guess you could consider that.

If not though, then you just have to be super firm with yourself. I believe I suffer from limerence- obsessive crushes on people. So, I'm very prone to drifting off into some sort of beautiful fairytale on how we'll live happily ever after. I know that messes me up further in the long-term though so, I'm much stricter with myself when I feel it happening now. I just keep telling myself- this is limerence and it will mess you up! Plus, trying to not fantasize about them sexually is a major part. (If you have been even.)
 
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cosmic-realism

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Sep 7, 2024
48
I guess it depends on whether you think that- if you could have a relationship with them, whether that would turn your life around. But then, would you allow them the risk of getting involved with someone who is suicidal? But, if you have any interest in pursuing it, then I guess you could consider that.

If not though, then you just have to be super firm with yourself. I believe I suffer from limerence- obsessive crushes on people. So, I'm very prone to drifting off into some sort of beautiful fairytale on how we'll live happily ever after. I know that messes me up further in the long-term though so, I'm much stricter with myself when I feel it happening now. I just keep telling myself- this is limerence and it will mess you up! Plus, trying to not fantasize about them sexually is a major part. (If you have been even.)
Nah,it's this person who has been acting strange for these two days.Excessive handshakes is one of them.To be frank,I don't know what to interpret it as.This has never happened to me..I guess it is limerence on my part...but it's like a small light in this tunnel of darkness.I am experience things never experienced before.
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
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Nah,it's this person who has been acting strange for these two days.Excessive handshakes is one of them.To be frank,I don't know what to interpret it as.This has never happened to me..I guess it is limerence on my part...but it's like a small light in this tunnel of darkness.I am experience things never experienced before.

Yeah, limerence can be amazing. Like, the greatest highs but, they can lead to the greatest lows- unfortunately. It can be pretty hard to quit too- if they are something that is bringing us joy but, I've learnt my lesson (finally- I hope anyway.) Something made me very limerent a few weeks back but, things are starting to settle again now. I tend to follow a predictable pattern. I just try not to get too carried away with it now.

Yeah, excessive handshakes does seem a bit strange. I knew someone who used to do that a lot though. They got all obsessed that they could judge a person's character by the strength of their handshake. Not sure they were doing it because they fancied people. It felt more like they enjoyed forming opinions on people. Not saying this is what this person is doing of course.
 
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cosmic-realism

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Sep 7, 2024
48
Yeah, limerence can be amazing. Like, the greatest highs but, they can lead to the greatest lows- unfortunately. It can be pretty hard to quit too- if they are something that is bringing us joy but, I've learnt my lesson (finally- I hope anyway.) Something made me very limerent a few weeks back but, things are starting to settle again now. I tend to follow a predictable pattern. I just try not to get too carried away with it now.

Yeah, excessive handshakes does seem a bit strange. I knew someone who used to do that a lot though. They got all obsessed that they could judge a person's character by the strength of their handshake. Not sure they were doing it because they fancied people. It felt more like they enjoyed forming opinions on people. Not saying this is what this person is doing of course.
Haha the funny part is this person was acting as if we have known each other for years..always extending their hand and being too friendly..
Yeah, limerence can be amazing. Like, the greatest highs but, they can lead to the greatest lows- unfortunately. It can be pretty hard to quit too- if they are something that is bringing us joy but, I've learnt my lesson (finally- I hope anyway.) Something made me very limerent a few weeks back but, things are starting to settle again now. I tend to follow a predictable pattern. I just try not to get too carried away with it now.
Yes this limerence hurts a lot,especially for my depressed brain...It's hard not to get carried away..no idea how you do it
 
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cosmic-realism

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Sep 7, 2024
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Yeah, limerence can be amazing. Like, the greatest highs but, they can lead to the greatest lows- unfortunately. It can be pretty hard to quit too- if they are something that is bringing us joy but, I've learnt my lesson (finally- I hope anyway.) Something made me very limerent a few weeks back but, things are starting to settle again now. I tend to follow a predictable pattern. I just try not to get too carried away with it now.
UPDATE:Thank you very much for telling me this.I wanted to get out of this as soon as possible so I texted this acquaintance.Guess what,I got left on read :)...I am back on earth
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,296
UPDATE:Thank you very much for telling me this.I wanted to get out of this as soon as possible so I texted this acquaintance.Guess what,I got left on read :)...I am back on earth

That was a brave and I think- a good thing to do. Find out where you stand. I did the same with a crush once. Same thing- no response. Stupidly though, I made the mistake of still harbouring feelings for him quite a while after.

The weirder thing is, he died a few years back and honestly, I didn't feel all that much- so- it must have been limerence. If anything- and I know this will sound terrible- but I almost felt a relief. I think he was quite a manipulative person really. Especially with women. I don't think he was physically dangerous but, I think he could be emotionally exploitative- if that makes sense?

Anyhow, I hope you aren't feeling too bad about it? It's quite the emotional rollercoaster- I know.
 
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cosmic-realism

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Sep 7, 2024
48
That was a brave and I think- a good thing to do. Find out where you stand. I did the same with a crush once. Same thing- no response. Stupidly though, I made the mistake of still harbouring feelings for him quite a while after.

The weirder thing is, he died a few years back and honestly, I didn't feel all that much- so- it must have been limerence. If anything- and I know this will sound terrible- but I almost felt a relief. I think he was quite a manipulative person really. Especially with women. I don't think he was physically dangerous but, I think he could be emotionally exploitative- if that makes sense?

Anyhow, I hope you aren't feeling too bad about it? It's quite the emotional rollercoaster- I know.
I think we might be onto the same guy...We meet occasionally in school for work..For few days he acted as if he knew me forever,that too just recently...it all started there..and now he acts as if doesn't even know me.It was as if those few days happened in a different timeline...

The girls around him are all really pretty, considering he is below average and I am below average looking too.

My pride is crushed now but I feel a sense of peace.Limerence is scary,that much I have learnt.
 
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