Noodlebug

Noodlebug

Member
Aug 22, 2020
20
What stops you from going through with CTB?
The thought of what it will do to my family is what stops me, but I'm not sure how much longer I can carry on for.
 
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R

rt1989526

Paragon
Aug 2, 2020
935
Fear of failure. Pain. That's it.
 
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timetofly

timetofly

Student
Aug 8, 2020
110
My sister. I'll leave her all alone and she's in a difficult situation right now, it will be tough for her. I'm waiting till her situation improves or till I can't take it anymore.
 
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Shades of Grey

Shades of Grey

Student
Jun 17, 2020
183
I have a geriatric cat that I hand-reared from birth when I was younger. (Bottle baby.) Nearing two decades, not in particularly good health anymore. He's had a happy existence despite some medical challenges, and I don't want it to end on that note. So I have chosen to wait until his time comes.

(It's not that I don't care about the impact my suicide may have on human loved ones... I've just reached the point where I can't continue living for others anymore.)
 
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almost_dead

almost_dead

Arcanist
Aug 7, 2020
465
I wanna sleep with my crush
 
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Noodlebug

Noodlebug

Member
Aug 22, 2020
20
I have dogs, they are another reason not to CTB.
 
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G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,017
It's tough isn't it.
Yeah, very. Taking it one day at a time helps, as well as reminding yourself why you keep doing it. Hard to say how long we can live solely for the sake of others.
 
Ramirez

Ramirez

Criminally insane
Jun 10, 2019
396
my cowardice does. I literally have nothing LOL.
 
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Rn110bg101

Rn110bg101

I want to go home
Apr 18, 2019
412
Not having any reliable method is the main thing.
I'm trying to wait until my next birthday as well, see if my friend will come back… But I doubt they will, so it's not as much of a stop as the other thing.
 
T

TimeToBiteTheDust

Visionary
Nov 7, 2019
2,322
I'm in a situation in which I can't ctb. Won't go into details. I can't do it. It's what I most like to do but I have to stay. In the meantime I research about methods.
 
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Sprite_Geist

Sprite_Geist

NULL
May 27, 2020
1,591
Still trying to find the ideal method. And yes I know "ideal" doesn't exist because they all have disadvantages.
 
W

Wisdom3_1-9

he/him/his
Jul 19, 2020
1,954
It changes. It's usually thinking about my mother or my husband. Sometimes it's a faint glimmer of hope for the future. Sometimes it's fear of pain.
 
Noodlebug

Noodlebug

Member
Aug 22, 2020
20
It changes. It's usually thinking about my mother or my husband. Sometimes it's a faint glimmer of hope for the future. Sometimes it's fear of pain.
I get this, it is like a constant wave of change
 
BPD Barbie

BPD Barbie

Visionary
Dec 1, 2019
2,361
It's a combination of things. Fear of failure as failing opens up a new can of worms I'm not willing to deal with. My mother, it will destroy her. I also, when I have mania, feel like things can get better which is stupid.
 
mxEll

mxEll

Member
Apr 21, 2020
25
Like many others it is the fear of failure that stops me. There's also a strong feeling of not wanting to be seen as a quitter, which is part of the problem in the first place - putting too much stock in to what others think of me.

I'm in a situation in which I can't ctb. Won't go into details. I can't do it. It's what I most like to do but I have to stay. In the meantime I research about methods.

What a coincidence, nice avatar :heart:
 
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TheSoundofTime

TheSoundofTime

In time you will find peace...
Aug 9, 2020
71
What stops you from going through with CTB?
The thought of what it will do to my family is what stops me, but I'm not sure how much longer I can carry on for.
Deep question and so simple that you hardly think of this.... thank you for that
I think what stops me is a small hope that I can still make this life work.
 
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VIBRITANNIA

VIBRITANNIA

lelouch. any pronouns. pfp is by pixiv id 3217872.
Aug 10, 2020
1,156
i still haven't got everything i need to ctb, and i'm waiting for a good opportunity to do it.

i have my little sister, and i'd like to spend some more time with her in order to leave her with some good memories of me.

i also have some projects i want to finish, as well as shows/movies that i want to watch.
 
mpnf

mpnf

Mental anguish..no more please.
Oct 3, 2019
190
The dream of my life and my only reason to exist and wait for.
 
Rue89

Rue89

Visionary
Feb 10, 2020
2,726
My anxiety, and fears about pain during ctb or failure. I think I'm starting to get over some of that fear though.
 
M

mapletree

Student
Aug 22, 2020
199
Don't have many family members left. It's just me my mom and brother. We've had a lot of death and loss and stuff and I dont want to leave them alone with no support (my mom doesn't have much social support, my brother is a bit better), even though I'm miserable and I'm making them miserable as well. Love them but sometimes I wish they would just like tell me to fuck off so I could leave without worrying about them being sad

also my brain keeps trying to think about what it would be like not to exist, gets caught in a loop, and it freaks me out if I think about the actual feeling of non existence too much in a literal sense
 
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onlyeverexisting

onlyeverexisting

Member
Nov 24, 2019
33
Don't have many family members left. It's just me my mom and brother. We've had a lot of death and loss and stuff and I dont want to leave them alone with no support (my mom doesn't have much social support, my brother is a bit better), even though I'm miserable and I'm making them miserable as well. Love them but sometimes I wish they would just like tell me to fuck off so I could leave without worrying about them being sad

also my brain keeps trying to think about what it would be like not to exist, gets caught in a loop, and it freaks me out if I think about the actual feeling of non existence too much in a literal sense

Both of these things a thousand times over. Don't want another suicide in the family. My lizard brain wanting to hold onto existence because it can't fathom nonexistence.

Also, if I fail, all it would do is leave me with a medical bill I couldn't hope to pay for the privilege of being hospitalized and kept alive against my will. I love the US "healthcare" system :smiling:
 
J

JAG_78

Getting ready
Feb 10, 2019
59
Immediate and long term Impact on family and friends.
Waiting for a miracle or trying out promising/miracle solutions that never pan out.
currently waiting for items nessecary to ctb & make it look natural. Probably deluding myself there too but gotta try.
 
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