ArchmagePrincess
Magical Princess of Death
- Aug 31, 2022
- 145
A while ago I posted about my situation of becoming homeless soon. Since then I had a concerned friend beg their parents to give me a place to stay and I've since been living with them. While I'm grateful for the lucky situation and their compassion, I still find myself uncertain where to even turn.
I find myself unable to hold a job anymore as my mental health has dropped so far down I have too many panic attacks and paranoid episodes to even show up to work on time or at all some days.
I made an appointment with a social security lawyer to try and get me to apply for SSI disability benefits but I fear the worst. I have a spotty medical record since I've been in and out of treatment due to financial struggles and I was informed judges like to see a continuous line of following doctor's orders and seeing professionals consistently. Since I don't believe in mental health medication it might reveal a history of me trying some and then immediately stopping when it makes me worse or sick.
Even with disability benefits, I'm told it would take around 2 years for me to see them and I only have maybe a few months of living where I am. Additionally, it seems I'll also need public housing or Section 8 to be able to afford rent even on SSI and after calling around many waitlists are closed entirely or have wait times 2-3 or more years long. Someone on this site sent me this website https://howtogeton.wordpress.com/section-8-hud-vouchers/ and it's helped a lot but I'm starting to lose hope.
It's hard enough just to get up the stairs and make food and take showers with my mental health status, let alone making tons of phone calls and emails, and not losing hope they're getting anywhere or that I'm doing something wrong.
I don't exactly want to die, but my condition for CTBing is if I'm homeless I don't wanna stick around for that. I'm incredibly stressed and not sure where to turn. I'm more than willing to accept my death if homelessness is imminent but I don't want to go down without a fight. I'm just incredibly exhausted after everything I've been through.
I see a potential future for myself where I can get a government-assisted apartment and I'm on SSI. I have a place to myself, me and all my stuffed animals can be at peace. I don't have to suck abuser's dicks anymore just to have a home. Without the burden of having a million jobs and toughing out mental health issues at the same time, I can work on bettering my mental health, and do all sorts of things I've wanted to but never had the time or energy for. Learning to cook, learning to write, paint, draw, hell I could even have a relationship that I wasn't forced into due to financial issues for once.
I have some amount of hope and dreams for the future, but I'm also struggling immensely. Does anyone have advice for me?
I find myself unable to hold a job anymore as my mental health has dropped so far down I have too many panic attacks and paranoid episodes to even show up to work on time or at all some days.
I made an appointment with a social security lawyer to try and get me to apply for SSI disability benefits but I fear the worst. I have a spotty medical record since I've been in and out of treatment due to financial struggles and I was informed judges like to see a continuous line of following doctor's orders and seeing professionals consistently. Since I don't believe in mental health medication it might reveal a history of me trying some and then immediately stopping when it makes me worse or sick.
Even with disability benefits, I'm told it would take around 2 years for me to see them and I only have maybe a few months of living where I am. Additionally, it seems I'll also need public housing or Section 8 to be able to afford rent even on SSI and after calling around many waitlists are closed entirely or have wait times 2-3 or more years long. Someone on this site sent me this website https://howtogeton.wordpress.com/section-8-hud-vouchers/ and it's helped a lot but I'm starting to lose hope.
It's hard enough just to get up the stairs and make food and take showers with my mental health status, let alone making tons of phone calls and emails, and not losing hope they're getting anywhere or that I'm doing something wrong.
I don't exactly want to die, but my condition for CTBing is if I'm homeless I don't wanna stick around for that. I'm incredibly stressed and not sure where to turn. I'm more than willing to accept my death if homelessness is imminent but I don't want to go down without a fight. I'm just incredibly exhausted after everything I've been through.
I see a potential future for myself where I can get a government-assisted apartment and I'm on SSI. I have a place to myself, me and all my stuffed animals can be at peace. I don't have to suck abuser's dicks anymore just to have a home. Without the burden of having a million jobs and toughing out mental health issues at the same time, I can work on bettering my mental health, and do all sorts of things I've wanted to but never had the time or energy for. Learning to cook, learning to write, paint, draw, hell I could even have a relationship that I wasn't forced into due to financial issues for once.
I have some amount of hope and dreams for the future, but I'm also struggling immensely. Does anyone have advice for me?
