It's definitely better to have multiple people thats a support network I've always craved and wanted but never managed to achieve what i feel i need is muiltple people who can support me on a deeper level while having people i can maybe just talk with causally but idk
It's difficult to find those people sadly but i still feel i need a number one of sorts but that's difficult to find in all honesty and tbh i dont mind the idea of being controlled it's certainly preferred to trying to control and hurt someone anyway
A guess its difficult for me to have a balance in anything really..i'll be frank with you
And i guess my inability to give space is my fatal flaw with how clingy and latched onto people i can get often can overwhelm and push people away
But i guess heighted codependency is a flaw i'm just not sure how to work on that fully to were it isn't a problem
And i feel you not wanting to be attached to one sole person anymore i guess thats somewhat were you and i differ but maybe i'm wrong to feel the way i do perhaps
Okay, yeah i can understand it.
Finding such friends is hard and i am also struggling with that so i just know the theory of that but can't really do it practically either.
I also am far from balanced but due to therapy and stuff i have come to think about what could help in the past, what could make it better and all the other things but my ctb thoughts are still louder and getting even louder.
I do not want to sound like a therapist but being clingy is a habit, just like anything else and that was formed and increased due to some experiences you made in the past. You could with work of therapy change that or at least decrease of how bad it gets - if you want to of course. I am just here to share ideas.
My opinion is coming from a mental abusive relationship i was in. The person was the world for me literally, he had everything i could ask and wish for, it felt like the perfect relationship, like two souls had found each other (at least that is what i thought for a long time), although he was also mental sick and probably had more problems than me. Intentionally or not he tried to force some stuff on me and tried to change my personality which made me wake up but i still stuck around him for months as "friends" as i was way too attached to him and couldn't let go. It still took a year to finally cut him out of my life completely, for the better and he still kept trying to get me back and made me feel worse. But he did not really want me, he did not see me like i was really, he had a different version of me in his head - but that person was not me.
That is the reason that i do not seek one sole person anymore, i need some balance myself and some people to talk to, some different opinions and ideas. But that's me and my story - yeah.