What have you learned from your parents? Good and bad things

[noname223]

To be honest my parents were horrible. The best thing I did was trying to forget most of the things they taught me after my psychosis. They were extremely toxic. Ignorant as fuck. Maybe my interest into politics emerged due to them. But their politcial stances were rubbish. My dad always read the worst yellow press in the country. I still have to listen to his bullshit takes.

My mom told me my dad only would be lazy not depressed. I tried to become a responsible citizen but I am way too fragile due to the abuse. I am a wreck.

Maybe a positive thing was drugs can cause huge damage. In case I took drugs I would have now even more problems. And I would blame myself for getting iil. So instead I can fully blame the abuse of my parents.

I cannot really say much positive. Not about financials, values, education etc. The only thing is they were kind of an example how not to do it. My mom is kind of eager. And I am disciplined. But due to the abuse all the positive things became too extreme. My relation to for example education or food is so toxic.

 

[GrumpyFrog]

The only thing is they were kind of an example how not to do it.

I can certainly relate to this.
My dad was a complete non-presence during my childhood (he left the family when I was 6 and made no effort to contact me until I was a high school senior, and even before that I cannot remember a single meaningful interaction with him, and my mother confirms, I don't think he ever played with me or tried to teach me anything at all when I was a young child). But as for my mom, I think the most valuable skill I learned from her is being independent and self-sufficient, and that was something I learned due the combination of her rather callous indifference and lack of sympathy to me and my issues that forced me to learn to solve my own problems without asking anyone for help from a rather young age, and due to her being an example of how you should never live your life by growing completely codependent in each of her 4 marriages that were all horrible relationships with awful people. I don't want to dump on my mom too badly, she wasn't the "worst parent ever" and I'm sure she did give me sound advice at some point in my life and taught me some valuable life skills (such as first aid), but in my case her being a negative example of what you should never prioritize in your life was so much more impactful than whatever she was intentionally trying to teach me. I guess that is a relatively common experience.

I'm sorry your parents sucked so much. I hope you can eventually outgrow their influence.

 

[Deboneire1]

Almost nothing good. They are brainwashed sheeple.

 

[theboy]

values
shut up

 

[GrumpyFrog]

values
shut up

 

[theboy]

I learned human values
I learned to keep quiet when I am insulted (but that was at school).

 

[Someone123]

I have learned that some people are monsters and you can't change them no matter how hard you try.

 

[GrumpyFrog]

I learned human values
I learned to keep quiet when I am insulted (but that was at school).

Oh, I see, thank you for explaining. I was confused about the "shut up" part.

 

[theboy]

Oh, I see, thank you for explaining. I was confused about the "shut up" part.

no problem

 

[darksapo]

values

 

[hamvil]

I learned that to educate a kid you need to beat him. That you should never hug him. That you should make him feel like he is worthless. All this as long as you maybe buy a few toys and gadgets. This is the model I received from my parents. Ah I also learned that you need to abuse your wife/partner both verbally and physically.