What have you felt when you looked death into its eyes?

[noname223]

I did not take the SN. But I smelled it. And my mouth was already at the glass.

I was manic and on benzos. And my anxiety wasn't that bad. The thought that my thinking would stop when I drink that was very relieving. But I am not sure whether the pain in that moment would have been strong enough to overcome SI. I think this is a disadvantage when I kill myself when I am manic. I am more scared about the crash that will come. It is not about the pain in that moment.

There was pain involved. And parts of me did not want to die. But the thought was peace was so alluring.

 

[Pluto]

 

[tpboy]

i worry less about death and more about the transition

 

[ijustwishtodie]

i worry less about death and more about the transition

This!! For me, death is peaceful. What I worry about is dying

 

[no.one]

i worry less about death and more about the transition

same!

 

[iloveyouihateyou]

one time last year i rushed to my room after a huge yelling match with my mom, and i grabbed my prized possession, a folding bowie knife with a 6 inch blade and pointed it close towards my throat. my mind completely silenced and it felt so strange to know that one push and it would all fade to black. it felt like the whole world just stopped moving for a second. it reminded me how fragile humans really are. as you can see with this post i did not follow through and i just closed the knife and cried. if that was anything, i guess knowing your death is so close can feel peaceful if you really do want it to end.

 

[-nobodyknows-]

The feeling of swallowing a bunch of pills… it's such a strange feeling. It's different from other things, like a hanging attempt, where you just need to do one simple thing. When you're done, and sitting there wondering if things are finally over… It wasn't what I'd call peaceful, but an odd sort of acceptance and resignation to your fate.

 

[Surai]

the eager raw, real, certain, creature of pure truth. the reason for it all

 

[figtree]

it wasn't even from an attempt, but i had a near-death experience. all i could think was, no one is going to find me and my cat will die :(

 

[Jeebo5021]

The peace does seem so welcoming. To be free of the pain and potential pain. When I use to self harm with a razor blade I got close to that. It felt like bliss, like finally some contentment.