what do you think constitutes harassment on a forum?

[Disappointered]

I was on a forum recently and had a post removed for, supposedly, harassment.

The person who's post I was replying to mentioned things about an administrative situation they left because some things were not to their liking. I asked what with the phrase "care to eleborate?".

This, I was told, constitutes harassment (?!?). The reasons were stated, by the person/people who removed the post, as "personal" and this was, apparently, the justification for my question constituting harassment. Am I blind to my behavior here? There are some things that are objective and this is pretty clearly one of them. The person's post did not mention personal issues. The details could have been personal or not. Moreover, even if they were explicitly stated to have been personal rather than policy or indirectly related issues, asking if they care to elaborate is not harassment. Imputing harassment to someone who hasn't harassed when it's obvious they haven't however, is very reproachable behavior and should itself be subject to administrative intervention.

Now, there is of course the bizarre possibility that the reasons given as "it's personal" mean it's not something I/we want you asking so don't...aaaaaand I can deem you a harasser so don't question my command not to ask about this...but holy shit I think that would be even more inappropriate. I like to think someone doesn't understand that asking whether someone can elaborate doesn't constitute harassment than that I was just threatened by a corrupt administrator(s).

 

[ecmnesia]

don't have a clue. but surely not what you described.

 

[Disappointered]

Thank you!

 

[Disappointered]

You can take my account of events of face value or assume I'm lying/leaving something out.

I did let the matter drop: I asked a question once and didn't return to it. What I find odd is to be told I harassed someone when I didn't.

 

[Disappointered]

This is the suicide forum. It's not the I got told I harassed someone when I didn't forum.

Well, now that you mention it again, I just realized this might be the wrong section for this thread and should be moved to the offtopic section. But if you're saying I shouldn't ask people whether I was just abused I disagree. I'm not going to dwell on it but it makes me wonder about how these online forums actually function.

 

[Aap]

Abused?

 

[LastFlowers]

I think I saw the comment you are referring to, that was just today right? I can't remember which thread but maybe it's best not to say because the person who felt harassed will probably feel even worse from this post.

I have to say though, if that's considered harassment then please, by all means, take over the job of the people who have actually harassed me on this site, even in the past 24hrs. I will hire you immediately! That sounds like heaven compared to the stuff I've deemed reportable. But I think the person probably took that question as a jab, or like you weren't taking them seriously unless they would elaborate. That's my guess, and some people do like to poke the bear around here so I can't say I blame them, maybe you were the straw that broke the camel's back and they were fed up or at their wit's end long before you came along.

It is also possible that the reason they gave for reporting you didn't translate to anything perfectly so you were told a general reason like "harassment". I have no idea though. The only experience I have with given reasons were "thread derailing", I don't know their whole list of terms that they are allowed to spell out to the accused without outing the accuser.

 

[Disappointered]

This is the suicide forum. It's not the I got told I harassed someone when I didn't forum. Sometimes things like this have to be dropped. Especially not made into it's own thread on the suicide forum. Just let it go.

It's now it the offtopic thread...is that what you meant? I mean I know this isn't the I got told I harassed someone when I didn't forum but this is the offtopic section.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

When you say it happened on another forum, do you mean a forum that's not SS?

 

[Disappointered]

I wanted to keep it hypothetical rather than personalize it to the people involved but so I left it open.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Well the comment itself doesn't seem harassing, but there's a whole lot of context left out here to be able to make a reasonable assessment. If, say, you had a history with that member where there was discord between you, in threads and/or PMs, and they said they didn't want to engage with you anymore, and then you made that comment, then I could see the comment being called harassment. Did anything like that happen?

 

[141592653]

Hey ! To me harsassment cannot be done in one post. I can't judge for your post but one post can be agressive, outrageous, triggering etc. but it cannot be harassment cauz harassment is made on a long period of time. I suffered harassment and the main impact it had on me was the constant shaming, insults for a long time (3 years in my case). To harass somebody you would need to message them on a regularly basis to make a dangerous negative impact on them.

Though I would say if this person is harassed by other people on that topic, you probably involuntarily took part to the harassment and triggered them cauz they may overreact if they are harassed (that's exactly what I did a lot when I was harrassed).

 

[Disappointered]

Well the comment itself doesn't seem harassing, but there's a whole lot of context left out here to be able to make a reasonable assessment. If, say, you had a history with that member where there was discord between you, in threads and/or PMs, and they said they didn't want to engage with you anymore, and then you made that comment, then I could see the comment being called harassment. Did anything like that happen?

No. What happened is exactly what I said happened and nothing more.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

Like @GoodPersonEffed is saying I wouldn't say that post sounds like harassment but depending on the context there could have been grounds to remove it. Sometimes things get removed for confusing reasons or without much reason at all; moderation is often imperfect so I wouldn't worry to much if you really think you did nothing wrong.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I would call harassment refusing to leave someone alone when they have asked you to. The dictionary definition is somewhat more nebulous, but personally I'd regard it as continuing to either say disparaging things about someone, or even continuing to contact them when they have explicitly told you to go away.

 

[Wayfaerer]

That doesn't sound like harassment at all, provided if that's all there is to the story.

 

[Disappointered]

Whatever the grounds to remove it might (if there even were any) have been, they didn't include harassment.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

Whatever the grounds to remove it might (if there even were any) have been, they didn't include harassment.

Sorry, this has been kind of confusing. I went back and re-read the OP, I think maybe I'm starting to understand.

The reason for deleting the post was "personal," as in, the mod determined it was a personal question, correct?

The word harassment was never brought up by the mod or the person you asked, correct?

 

[Disappointered]

No, this is what it said:

Your post in the thread New Moderators was deleted. Reason: its personal reasons, do not harass members.
Yesterday at 2:39 PM