Discussion What do you fear most about death?

[BrainSplatter]

I've realised that it's not the idea of death itself that scares me – it's the possibility of a slow or painful end, and the uncertainty of what comes after. Imagine dying only to be reborn, forced to relive the same miserable life over and over again. All I really want is peace and comfort from my life but what if death just brings more suffering? I don't think it will, but I see so many people talking about heaven, hell, and how suicide is a sin, and it's made me question things I never really considered before. But now that I'm sitting here thinking about it, it feels like my mind is just creating irrational fears to try to protect itself. None of this has been proven one way or the other, so why even fear it?

I'm planning to CTB in the spring, after my son's adoption, but I feel ready now – and that's why this is so hard. Grieving the loss of my son while he's still alive is unbearable, and dealing with that alongside BPD makes it even harder. I can't afford to act impulsively. My drug use is a problem –I've always used recklessly, but lately I keep overdoing it and ending up in A&E. There are only so many times I can say yes it was recreational when they keep questioning if it was intentional OD. I need to stay on track with the plan, with no changes to my CTB date under any circumstances. I know I'd benefit from having a partner, but I'm struggling to find one. UK peeps be hiding lol.

 

[itsgone2]

Good set of choices. Results interesting so far. Hopefully more participation

 

[TAW122]

I've more/less made peace with the concept and idea of 'death' even around late adolescence and especially during adulthood. If I had any fear about death, it would be the process of dying and the suffering associated with it. However, that could be overcome by suppressing my SI (Survival instinct, self-preservation instinct), understanding the method of choice including the execution of said method, and also planning carefully. I trust logic and science as well as the research about method efficacy to give me confidence that I will succeed and likely not suffer horrendously.

 

[dogdrool]

I was never scared about what came after death until I really tried to kill myself and suddenly I became terrified. Imagining just some kind of non-existence is just something I can't wrap my head around and that scares me. I used to believe in reincarnation but my brain won't allow me to do so anymore.

 

[SomewhereNew]

I've realised that it's not the idea of death itself that scares me – it's the possibility of a slow or painful end, and the uncertainty of what comes after. Imagine dying only to be reborn, forced to relive the same miserable life over and over again. All I really want is peace and comfort from my life but what if death just brings more suffering? I don't think it will, but I see so many people talking about heaven, hell, and how suicide is a sin, and it's made me question things I never really considered before. But now that I'm sitting here thinking about it, it feels like my mind is just creating irrational fears to try to protect itself. None of this has been proven one way or the other, so why even fear it?

I'm planning to CTB in the spring, after my son's adoption, but I feel ready now – and that's why this is so hard. Grieving the loss of my son while he's still alive is unbearable, and dealing with that alongside BPD makes it even harder. I can't afford to act impulsively. My drug use is a problem –I've always used recklessly, but lately I keep overdoing it and ending up in A&E. There are only so many times I can say yes it was recreational when they keep questioning if it was intentional OD. I need to stay on track with the plan, with no changes to my CTB date under any circumstances. I know I'd benefit from having a partner, but I'm struggling to find one. UK peeps be hiding lol.

I just can't fathom God punishing every person for ctb because a lot of great people have done it, honest good people. It's not the ultimate sin imo and should be forgiveable if we somehow do face judgement and it's not just the end of our consciousness entirely similarly to as before birth.

 

[itsgone2]

As of right now, physical pain and suffering is number one in this poll. It's been discussed a few times on here but is that what survival instinct really is? A fear of pain? Maybe it's not all that complicated.

 

[Liebestod]

Nothing, maybe it's because I have a quick and essentially painless method but I've made peace with death and I'm confident there's no afterlife.