Venting What do other people see in me?

[Deleted member 17949]

How do others find all these optimistic things to say about me? At times I can't tell whether they actually have a positive opinion of me or are just mindlessly trying to cheer me up. A year ago when I was in therapy I remember being struck by the fact that when asked what good qualities I had, I couldn't think of any. My therapist said that I was a nice person, but almost any normal human you meet is not going to be rude to you for no reason. Aside from that, I have nothing. I'm a total loser and I don't really know what I can do to fix that, if anything. It's hard to care about keeping my life going when the person living it is such a bland and useless guy.

 

[Icunurse]

Can u tell me about yourself??
I'm new sorry

 

[Cosmiq]

I think at times we just want to encourage others to feel like the world isn't so bad. That even if you don't enjoy life, your time on this earth, and struggle with believing that society isn't fucked that sometimes we want to believe in others.

A few days ago, I was on reddit and came across a post of 13 year old kid on a sub saying he felt like crap and would appreciate any type of positivity. I wrote a post filled with optimism that I'd never had for myself. I genuinely hope that he'd find happiness within the world, and as he grows he'll enjoy life. I try and believe that others have the potential to lead a life that I won't experience.
So with that being said, I think the people that you come across you might just hold a place of hope for others even if they lack it themselves or don't know the person that deeply. There are different versions of us that exist in every persons mind we come across. Different versions that are nothing like the versions we see of ourselves. I always think about how you can only see a reflection of your face and eyes in a mirror or on video and pictures, but we never get to experience what others see when they look into our eyes and view us from outside our own bodies.

 

[ssaaahmo]

I think at times we just want to encourage others to feel like the world isn't so bad. That even if you don't enjoy life, your time on this earth, and struggle with believing that society isn't fucked that sometimes we want to believe in others.

A few days ago, I was on reddit and came across a post of 13 year old kid on a sub saying he felt like crap and would appreciate any type of positivity. I wrote a post filled with optimism that I'd never had for myself. I genuinely hope that he'd find happiness within the world, and as he grows he'll enjoy life. I try and believe that others have the potential to lead a life that I won't experience.
So with that being said, I think the people that you come across you might just hold a place of hope for others even if they lack it themselves or don't know the person that deeply. There are different versions of us that exist in every persons mind we come across. Different versions that are nothing like the versions we see of ourselves. I always think about how you can only see a reflection of your face and eyes in a mirror or on video and pictures, but we never get to experience what others see when they look into our eyes and view us from outside our own bodies.

it's refreshing to see someone try to spread some genuine positivity

 

[ZardozOmega]

i bet youre cute

 

[Deleted member 17949]

Can u tell me about yourself??
I'm new sorry

Not much to say, I'm 18 year old guy and I don't like myself.

I think at times we just want to encourage others to feel like the world isn't so bad. That even if you don't enjoy life, your time on this earth, and struggle with believing that society isn't fucked that sometimes we want to believe in others.

A few days ago, I was on reddit and came across a post of 13 year old kid on a sub saying he felt like crap and would appreciate any type of positivity. I wrote a post filled with optimism that I'd never had for myself. I genuinely hope that he'd find happiness within the world, and as he grows he'll enjoy life. I try and believe that others have the potential to lead a life that I won't experience.
So with that being said, I think the people that you come across you might just hold a place of hope for others even if they lack it themselves or don't know the person that deeply. There are different versions of us that exist in every persons mind we come across. Different versions that are nothing like the versions we see of ourselves. I always think about how you can only see a reflection of your face and eyes in a mirror or on video and pictures, but we never get to experience what others see when they look into our eyes and view us from outside our own bodies.

Probably, though it feels like the encouragement is so automatic it means nothing.

i bet youre cute

I beg to differ

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

How do others find all these optimistic things to say about me?

What do they say?

 

[GirlInBlue]

Probably, though it feels like the encouragement is so automatic it means nothing.

I can relate to that. Most of the people I'm around are so encouraging that I can't tell what's genuine and what's scripted.

That said, some people just like people right off the bat. You don't need to have special qualities to earn affection from others. Being praised for qualities you don't think you have can absolutely feel awful, but it doesn't necessarily mean they are lying to you; that could just be their genuine perception of you. A lot of the time people compliment or encourage others when they notice improvement, too, so you may not have "good qualities" but you may be improving your qualities.
Even flaws can be perceived as a good thing, because it might make you seem more relatable.

A lot of different things could be going on.

 

[Bct]

I feel similar with you. I've asked on social media what's concretely good about me because I mostly know what's bad about myself, LOL. Just 2 people answered, with one answer was me being well-dressed. I admit about that quality, but nobody said about my personality. So mostly nothing good from myself.