Hi Michaelwaev
I am so sorry you feeling so bad and looking for assisted euthanasia. Unfortunately it is not that simple though :( I live in one of the countries where it is legal, even for mental health reasons but it is very tough to get that approved (I have tried!). They first need to prove you are beyond help and you would need years of "evidence" that nobody can save you. This would include medical interventions, substance abuse rehabilitation (if necessary - if you drink or use drugs), other psychotherapy etc etc. It would also be even more difficult if you were not a resident so you would first need to find a way to live in said country.
I hope you find what you are looking for either way. I wish there was an easier alternative but sadly not. Good luck x