Freelyffe88

Freelyffe88

Member
Jun 28, 2021
98
Around two years or so go I came across the Carbon Monoxide method using charcoal (either 2 charcoal grills or using chimney starters, using 2 metal buckets) and I just held onto that being the method I would use when the timing was right…. However as the timing has come I've done more research and found that the Carbon Monoxide method isn't as easy or smooth as it first appeared. You either need to be in a house (apartment complex could effect others), have a car or a tent… however the tent method seems much more challenging than I originally thought because you need a top of the line water proofed to the max tent. If you don't have a car, you have to lug a bunch of shit (2 charcoal grills a tent a large bag of charcoal, water, etc to whatever remote area that may exist in your area). And when all said is done, it seems like a challenging method and it's a method that you don't want to fail at doing, because it could turn you into a vegetable. It's difficult to know what testimonials are true, but if I take them at face value, CO seems to fail a lot… however in various Asian countries the charcoal method is very popular and statistically seems to be very effective… perhaps they have an untampored with form of charcoal? because in many of the documented suicides I've come across, the person has just a little bowl of charcoal and it apparently does the trick. All the instructional info I've come across recommends 2 medium grills and a shit load of charcoal. Then it's a cluster fuck of info pertaining to how long you're supposed to let the charcoal burn before and when to enter, etc. As a result I've concluded that the charcoal method isn't as optimal as I initially thought. If I had a house, this would probably be my 2nd or 3rd ideal suicide method.

Obviously Nembutal – which is probably the most effective/painless way to off yourself. The catch is, it's not that easy to obtain and it's very expensive (approximately $500 - $1000+). I'm good at navigating the dark web and I know how to purchase whatever… however with something like Nembutal it's difficult to trust the sources (even with good feedback). Not so much that the seller is a scammer, rather you just don't know if the seller is an undercover FED. I'm convinced the dark web is run mostly by CIA/FED operatives. If you're buying recreational drugs and what not they're almost certainly not going to care because they're the ones profiting by selling them. They of course bust independent manufacturers/sellers who dare compete with them, but buyers, rarely. But something like Nembutal I would be very nervous buying (these sociopaths don't want people peacefully offing themselves), so it's not something that's worth the risk, unless it's your only option.

After more research I came across the exit bag method (with either helium or nitrogen)…. but the whole thing about getting a big ass tank of nitrogen seemed like a pain in the nuts and there appears to be a lot of negatives about the helium method due to it's purity. This is not meant to compare to the helium/nitrogen exit bag method, but I tested the exit bag method using carbon dioxide (using citric acid, water and sodium bicarbonate) and it was the freakiest 3 seconds of my life. Carbon dioxide instantaneously takes all the breathable oxygen out of the bag, so I was instantly gasping for air and came close to losing consciousness (all the blood either rushed in or out of my head and I was borderline unconscious). I'm guessing that if you hang in there for 5 seconds you could lose consciousness and it could be a quick method, but trust me when I say those 5 seconds are brutal and if this method doesn't work it could leave you brain damaged (for the record using carbon dioxide with an exit bag is very atypical, I just came across a suicide were someone used this method and I was curious since I had everything I needed to test it out). Overall the nitrogen exit bag may be one of the better methods, but for me it's challenging to get the nitrogen. And if I were to go to that extreme I may as well take my chances with purchasing Nembutal as opposed to my big ass nitrogen tank coming via the mail. But even if I had the nitrogen tank I prefer one more method even more.

Finally I came across the SN (sodium nitrate), which after my research I have concluded it's by far the best suicide method for myself. I had already come across SN, but I was initially turned off by the puking factor. But when I came back to it, I looked into it much deeper. Based on the dozens of cases of people who failed and succeeded using this method, I have concluded that it's a relatively peaceful method and you lose consciousness pretty fast (from the time you drink the SN, most are unconscious within 10-15 minutes and officially dead after about 40 minutes). You more than likely will still absorb enough even if you spew, but just in case, that's what the second glass is for. Almost all of those who have failed, failed because they didn't do it in a place of privacy and they were heard/found before the SN did it's job… but the good that I take away from that is… I've yet to come across a failed attempt that resulted in brain damage or physical damage and almost everyone who survived says that it wasn't painful… they lost consciousness pretty fast and next thing they knew they were in a hospital.
SN is extremely easy to get a hold of (in the US that is) and even if it isn't it's not very difficult to make your own. When you research the SN method it's a tad overwhelming at first because there's this recommended routine of taking a cocktail of other shit, much of which are challenging to get (particularly the antimetics). I have concluded that taking this large cocktail seems to be very overrated. The extra cushion it is theorized to provide seems to be almost insignificant (the stats don't show much of a difference one way or the other). In some ways the antimetic info does more harm than good, because it leads many people on the fence to believe that since they can't get antimetics that the SN method is no longer an option (and it can make the SN instructions unnecessarily overwhelming for some), as a result they end up moving onto more ineffective less peaceful ways of suicide. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that the premeasures prior to taking SN are constantly changing/improving to hopefully create a greater cushion for those choosing to end their lives this way, but I think it's important to inform people that they are not essential to the SN method. I personally think SN straight up is still more peaceful than anything else, aside from Nembutal and if by chance SN fails you don't have to worry about being a vegetable. For me finding the SN method was a weight off my back, because I finally found a method that I'm comfortable with and can carry out as soon as I need it. I was nervous after the charcoal method fell through… what am I going to do, jump off a building?… which is a freaky way to go.
My SN regimen will be pretty simple. I'm going to fast for 8 hours, take tagement (over the counter antacid) or baking soda 45 minutes before (I've recently heard that baking soda is no longer recommended, but I'm not sure on that). For my antimetic, I'm just going to use Ginger root ($5 at any health food store), which in clinical trails/studies has been found nearly as effective as the prescription antimetics with cancer patients going through chemo. Lastly, take 25g of SN in 100ml of water with 1 or 2 backup glasses on hand. Hurling typically doesn't effect the outcome, as most people still absorb enough, but just in case, that's what the second glass is for. For the record I absolutely hate throwing up. To put it mildly my body has never thrown up well, I practically wake up the dead and crack ribs when I puke and I'm not a dramatic person (there are two types of people, those who can puke and rally and those who cannot, I'm on the extreme end of cannot). This is actually beneficial to me, since my body has a very difficult time puking stuff up. On multiple occasions throughout my life I've been over a toilet spewing my guts out for hours at a time... so if I can handle that I can handle a measly minute if by chance I happen to puke. Even when taking that into account In the scheme of things it doesn't get much easier than an SN suicide at least that's what I've concluded for myself.

A shotgun or gun to the brain stem seems quick and relatively painless as well, but there is a slight failure rate, especially with a gun. I came across a person on this forum who had a good plan of taking 25g of SN and then shooting themselves in the head… to me that's a great plan if you decide to take the gun route. To me there's just something easier about taking a small shot of SN and letting the ride happen as opposed to having your finger on the trigger and working up the courage to pull the trigger.
Anyways, to those out there looking for a peaceful way to end their lives, good luck on your research and I wish you the best in whatever path you choose, whether that's life or death. If you decide on the later, may you go as peacefully as possible.
 
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