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Harleyyy

Student
May 15, 2020
150
Do you ever just. Want to do it? But at the last moment your brain gives you false hopes that things MIGHT be okay someday although they wont.
 
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RileyTanaka

RileyTanaka

ill / failure
Mar 20, 2020
264
Of course, I'd argue that's why many of us are on here. A lot of us here call it survival instinct. I know I still have a little bit left of that in me too.
 
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Notwinnernotawin

Notwinnernotawin

Specialist
Apr 4, 2020
341
Yes. But I try to be rational. My method needs to be executed with patience, I need to be alone for at least 30 mins. I always have the urge to do it when I'm alone, tomorrow I may have the opportunity...
 
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H

Harleyyy

Student
May 15, 2020
150
Also the thought of surviving it is terrifying. I could end up in a much worse situation than now (dont think its possible but still) and i wouldnt get a chance to attempt it again and people will always treat me differently and i will be stripped naked emotionally infront of everyone
Yes. But I try to be rational. My method needs to be executed with patience, I need to be alone for at least 30 mins. I always have the urge to do it when I'm alone, tomorrow I may have the opportunity...
What is your method
Of course, I'd argue that's why many of us are on here. A lot of us here call it survival instinct. I know I still have a little bit left of that in me too.
This
Sucks.
 
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your pathologist

your pathologist

¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Sep 5, 2018
519
I had my method and some form of timeline
Then I freaked out and spent over a month in a psych ward looking for hope...
Now I can't find my sn and now im stuck here
 
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NightmareTour

NightmareTour

Specialist
May 13, 2020
398
Used to have that issue. Eventually managed to get rid of it the time before last, then someone found me. Last time, it wasn't there at all, but I fucked it up.
 
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a.n.kirillov

a.n.kirillov

velle non discitur
Nov 17, 2019
1,831
Yes, but my method has a preparation phase of 5+ days, which could be construed as an up- or a downside, depending on how you look at it.
 
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theguineapigking

theguineapigking

Useless piece of trash
Dec 5, 2019
593
Kind of. But I always just knew that things wouldn't get better.

It's more the thought of my family that's held me back soooo many times. But underneath all of that 'false hope', I see my situation for what it is; hopeless.

I also fear having others find out I attempted(if I fail). My body may be screwed up, but I'd have to get home from the hotel room, which would be hard if I'm still sickly(especially if I can't walk). If my family found out that I'm not still asleep in my bedroom, but rather I'm missing, it'll be a hella awkward conversation there.

Sorry about your situation man. You're welcome to pm me any time, if you need to talk more. I will just listen and respond, with no judgement.

Best wishes.
 
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TimeToBiteTheDust

Visionary
Nov 7, 2019
2,322
Yes. I'm suicidal everyday but it's like my mind tries sometimes to find silly excuses like food or movies to keep alive. I really enjoy eating or watching movies but it doesn't change that my life is fucked up.
 
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Ky204

Ky204

Member
Sep 3, 2019
97
I relate to this, I'd say it's why all of my past attempts at taking my life have failed, cause I wasn't committed. So I've resorted to starving myself to death (am down to 68Ibs), I went into cardiac arrest last week but unfortunately was not alone. So here I am, still stuck in the same crap.
 
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Inferdan

Inferdan

Meeting the first minor relapse after recovery
Nov 3, 2019
450
Thinking whether it was I who chose to live and turn myself around or it was SI
 

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