Venting warning signs, mental health and hospitalization

[LazarusOpus]

I have really complicated feelings about what would happen if somebody "found out" about me wanting to CTB,, I'm terrified of being sent to a ward again, I feel like the loss of my freedom would be worse than death. on the other hand I want somebody to notice the obvious signs and take action to care about me and keep me safe. sometimes i feel like I'm invisible, and no matter how loud I scream nobody cares if I live or die. I hate that thought process tho, nobody else's opinion except mine matters,, its my body.-
I just wish someone cared

 

[Bad-luck]

I have the same feelings as you bud. I don't want to people to find out about me wanting to CTB and get risk getting hospitalization but at the same, a part of me wants to get help. A part of me that wants my old, amazing self back. The worst part is that people are beginning to find out about my suicidal tendencies. The worst part? They aren't doing ANYTHING about it. They're just brushing it off.

 

[Kit1]

I am really sorry that you are yearning for what is basically a right to be cared for with respect and dignity - for help - andnsound slide you are struggling with ctb or to live with such care. What you are asking, hoping, yearning for is positive and should be everyone's rights to get - yet being scared of medical systems that might seem cold, clinical and deliver to the order from their files and boards rather than treat the patients as human beings with their own individual needs and wants.

Are you able to reach out to someone who can help you navigate through the system and get the help and compassionate care/treatment that you need?

On this forum, we care and venting might help. But away from here, is there someone who you can trust and reach out to - or even a charity or trusted therapist?

 

[Sleeper System]

I have the same feelings as you bud. I don't want to people to find out about me wanting to CTB and get risk getting hospitalization but at the same, a part of me wants to get help. A part of me that wants my old, amazing self back. The worst part is that people are beginning to find out about my suicidal tendencies. The worst part? They aren't doing ANYTHING about it. They're just brushing it off.

I have really complicated feelings about what would happen if somebody "found out" about me wanting to CTB,, I'm terrified of being sent to a ward again, I feel like the loss of my freedom would be worse than death. on the other hand I want somebody to notice the obvious signs and take action to care about me and keep me safe. sometimes i feel like I'm invisible, and no matter how loud I scream nobody cares if I live or die. I hate that thought process tho, nobody else's opinion except mine matters,, its my body.-
I just wish someone cared

The only concept of wards that I have are from movies. I feel like if they would just leave me my tablet then that would be enough freedom for me. I'm so scared of having my mental issues on the record that i've never sought out any help. I'm trying to help myself and that's how I found this place. It helps more than not.

If people found out I think for me they would say wow maybe that's why he was always so quiet and looked mad all the time. I think people would say that It explains a lot. I think they wouldn't judge me too harshly. The enviorment im from I think everyone is secretly suicidal.

 

[Kit1]

I have the same feelings as you bud. I don't want to people to find out about me wanting to CTB and get risk getting hospitalization but at the same, a part of me wants to get help. A part of me that wants my old, amazing self back. The worst part is that people are beginning to find out about my suicidal tendencies. The worst part? They aren't doing ANYTHING about it. They're just brushing it off.

I get the same response. I took an overdose late Friday night / early Saturday morning - whilst in a dissociative state. I had emailed my therapist and notnsaid anything about the overdose. Then I emailed my therapist just venting and without realising and in passing mentioned that I still feel quite ill from the overdose - this was as Monday night. She emailed me yesterday concerned and advised that she has contacted my doctor (who I had stopped engaging with more than three months ago as they are not able to meet my accessibility needs) and he will contact me. He didn't - so much for the caring profession!

 

[LazarusOpus]

I am really sorry that you are yearning for what is basically a right to be cared for with respect and dignity - for help - andnsound slide you are struggling with ctb or to live with such care. What you are asking, hoping, yearning for is positive and should be everyone's rights to get - yet being scared of medical systems that might seem cold, clinical and deliver to the order from their files and boards rather than treat the patients as human beings with their own individual needs and wants.

Are you able to reach out to someone who can help you navigate through the system and get the help and compassionate care/treatment that you need?

On this forum, we care and venting might help. But away from here, is there someone who you can trust and reach out to - or even a charity or trusted therapist?

I can't rly pay for anything like that,,, I might just be scraping for excuses tho.--