Wanting to be alive is terrifying

[anxiousguineapig]

I'm going through some stuff right now, and curious if anyone can relate/offer tips for dealing.
I was suicidal for years - I'm 18 now, and probably started wanting to die around the age of 10-11. Then things in my life got a lot better, and I started to believe I could actually have a good/happy life someday.

Now I'm absolutely terrified of the uncertainty in the world. Nuclear war, climate change... The world, which I now sort of enjoy being part of, could crumble at any moment. This has caused me so much anxiety that I almost feel suicidal again. It just makes me feel so demotivated, and wonder, what's the point?

I wish I could believe that everything will be ok but I can't. And it's all hitting me. Has anyone else gone through something similar?

 

[lonelygirl111]

if you can try some grounding techniques when you feel anxious like this, and try not to think so much of what will happen in the future. instead focus on making the best of the present. i get anxious too when i begin to think of how everything could go wrong in a matter of seconds. this fear makes me suicidal as well. i try to tell myself that this is out of my hands though, and that things will go the way they are meant to no matter how much i worry. i'm glad that your enjoying being a part of the world though even if it's just a sort of kind of thing. you deserve to enjoy everything around you and i hope you enjoy it even more in your future :)

 

[Zegers]

The world never was "okay" (at any epoch) and it never will be, the problems just changes. Its more about how you feel and not about the world anyway.

 

[Obliviate]

Honestly, it's only gonna be ok for the rich and privileged. Normal people are gonna continue to have a shitty life. Always struggling. I don't believe that there is a time of actual happiness. The world is terrifying. Racism, rape, murders, nuclear war, climate change, financial struggles........I don't think it will get better. Infact lot's of people think this is the end times and if that's true then get ready for the worst.

 

[Thomas_Europe]

I concur, there are phases of happiness and phases of sadness, but there will probably never be a phase of continuous untarnished pure joy. In religion, they call that heaven - if you believe in that concept. I personally have my doubts about that...