Discussion Victims of SA cases, how do you deal with it?

[Horifumada]

I unfortunately have been a victim of 2 separate cases of SA and due to the particular nature of it, I feel I've never recovered, my support has been minimal and I've lost just about all of my will to live. I really don't know why I'm alive anymore. I've been on an emotional roller-coaster these past few days due to this second case. I feel like I've been blamed for it occurring in the first place, but I don't know what I did wrong in the first place as I've never had a good example of a relationship with the opposite gender and such so at home I am more lax and things. It's hard to explain honestly for me.. But really, how am I meant to cope with this and improve my attitude, I feel like I'm stuck in the gutter.