SoulWhisperer
Nothing Like The Looks Ā« ā¤ļøāš©¹ Ā»
- Nov 13, 2023
- 581
Back in January, after more than 8+ years of abuse from my parents, I reported my family to the cops.
I've lived in utter anxiety and terror ever since, and still do. Back then they've only called the witnesses I named, unrelated to them, to ask them stuff. I was anxious.
Now, yesterday, they've contacted my grandparents (Whom I stayed at ever since) and my parents. They've all discovered about it.
The reaction of my grandparents was to keep it silent, especially my grandfather. My grandmother told me that what I did was "horrible" and that I "don't know what I'm going up against".
My parents reacted by cutting contact with me, I saw last night right before sleep that my mother had blocked me online. Meaning I can't text or call her anymore, she's done the same with my grandmother. It's not the first time but I doubt she'd unblock me now. [Edit: On top of that my father keeps claiming he never laid a finger on me while it's the complete opposite, I don't know if he genuinely believes he never did, if he never saw me getting choked as violence or if he's genuinely just lying for the sake of defending himself]
They have effectively ruined my life, from the moment I turned 8 and 13 to today, all those years, they have done nothing but psychologically and physically abuse me. They have denied my identity as gransgent, making me have to hide it and only damaged me psychologically and emotionally by making fun of me, bullying me, exploiting my weaknesses and insecurities, using my own vents against me. They've destroyed everything, and just like a kid that was neglected now I am basically on my own without being able to do anything, okay?
Let me tell you that being trans and unable to transition because of this REALLY does fucking hurt. My parents are the reason I became depressed, they are the reason I became suicidal, and are the reasons why I no longer see a path in life if not to die. Not because I like death and wanna die, but because I've been pushed by them towards a corner and now that's it. I've tried my best to avoid it, to avoid becoming homeless, to seek hopeless salvation, all to the very minimum avail. Unless something happens first I'll have time until June or July, then my life will take a steep turn: Living, or dying.
And on top of all of this. Do I have to justify my pain, ALL I had to go through, to someone such as institutions? No. My life is my life and I do NOT need someone to confirm me I suffered. And shall I end up in hot water for REPORTING it, then my voice to all fellow Italians is to not report it and get consumed by abuse, really. Because it'd be a joke.
I have never been diagnosed with learning deficits because my parents had too much pride to admit their child had anything. They deliberately but indirectly admitted so. And I don't even have any psychiatric or psychological diagnosis, despite clearly suffering from clinical depression and very possibly BPD, if not some other identity disorder, among many. I became a cocktail of brewing sicknesses no one ever bothered to check, and the result is clear: I cannot do anything now.
A cursed, broken life, from the start. All because of a pair of narcissistic, abusive parents. Really?
I conclude by saying that I don't know what's coming up next, but it won't be great. I'll just pray to survive, at least for a bit more.
I want this post to remain here and forever as proof of all that's happened, even if someone will try to brainwash me, my family and everyone into believing another fabricated story that will benefit them, despite having me as protagonist.
That's all from me now;
- SoulWhisperer
I've lived in utter anxiety and terror ever since, and still do. Back then they've only called the witnesses I named, unrelated to them, to ask them stuff. I was anxious.
Now, yesterday, they've contacted my grandparents (Whom I stayed at ever since) and my parents. They've all discovered about it.
The reaction of my grandparents was to keep it silent, especially my grandfather. My grandmother told me that what I did was "horrible" and that I "don't know what I'm going up against".
My parents reacted by cutting contact with me, I saw last night right before sleep that my mother had blocked me online. Meaning I can't text or call her anymore, she's done the same with my grandmother. It's not the first time but I doubt she'd unblock me now. [Edit: On top of that my father keeps claiming he never laid a finger on me while it's the complete opposite, I don't know if he genuinely believes he never did, if he never saw me getting choked as violence or if he's genuinely just lying for the sake of defending himself]
They have effectively ruined my life, from the moment I turned 8 and 13 to today, all those years, they have done nothing but psychologically and physically abuse me. They have denied my identity as gransgent, making me have to hide it and only damaged me psychologically and emotionally by making fun of me, bullying me, exploiting my weaknesses and insecurities, using my own vents against me. They've destroyed everything, and just like a kid that was neglected now I am basically on my own without being able to do anything, okay?
Let me tell you that being trans and unable to transition because of this REALLY does fucking hurt. My parents are the reason I became depressed, they are the reason I became suicidal, and are the reasons why I no longer see a path in life if not to die. Not because I like death and wanna die, but because I've been pushed by them towards a corner and now that's it. I've tried my best to avoid it, to avoid becoming homeless, to seek hopeless salvation, all to the very minimum avail. Unless something happens first I'll have time until June or July, then my life will take a steep turn: Living, or dying.
And on top of all of this. Do I have to justify my pain, ALL I had to go through, to someone such as institutions? No. My life is my life and I do NOT need someone to confirm me I suffered. And shall I end up in hot water for REPORTING it, then my voice to all fellow Italians is to not report it and get consumed by abuse, really. Because it'd be a joke.
I have never been diagnosed with learning deficits because my parents had too much pride to admit their child had anything. They deliberately but indirectly admitted so. And I don't even have any psychiatric or psychological diagnosis, despite clearly suffering from clinical depression and very possibly BPD, if not some other identity disorder, among many. I became a cocktail of brewing sicknesses no one ever bothered to check, and the result is clear: I cannot do anything now.
A cursed, broken life, from the start. All because of a pair of narcissistic, abusive parents. Really?
I conclude by saying that I don't know what's coming up next, but it won't be great. I'll just pray to survive, at least for a bit more.
I want this post to remain here and forever as proof of all that's happened, even if someone will try to brainwash me, my family and everyone into believing another fabricated story that will benefit them, despite having me as protagonist.
That's all from me now;
- SoulWhisperer
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