Venting Unexpected. (long post)

[Terrible00]

I had a close friend that stayed here for a while, she has a lot of problems in her life especially at her home. She was supposed to stay here the entire summer.
She is the only person in my life that I can actually vent to and tell my plans to ctb without getting into any trouble. Because she understands and is in a similar situation.
We have extreme fear of losing each other and we knew that she would have to get home at the end of the summer, and it would be painful to say goodbye.
So we mentally prepared ourselves, she would also celebrate her birthday here with us instead of being with her mother. And she was really happy about it.

We spent a lot of time togheter, we went to a lot of places around the area and went to the city.
I had originally planned to ctb this summer but she wanted me to stay alive a little longer just so we could spend time togheter and I promised her that.
We took a lot of care for each other, she is a good friend indeed, I noticed that she is a gift for me before I go. I would never want to leave her.

But of course, my parents didn't like her that much. They lied about her, she sent her to a mental hospital once just because they noticed a few scars on her leg. All of this was stressful and I was worried for her.
I fell asleep one night, it was about 30 days left, until our time was up. I was freaked out it feels so early despite being a month. So I fell asleep, I had a nightmare about me deperately trying to take her back screaming in pain seeing her leave with tears in my eyes.

Once the dream was finished, I heard someone run into my room in panic. The second I opened my eyes she was there in tears, telling me "I have to go I don't know why.. But I have to I'm sorry" and gave me a hug. I was in shock, I was lost and tired I had just woke up.
I was so tired I could barely react how I felt.
After giving me a hug, she ran away cause it was in a hurry. I quickly went up from my bed watching the car outside leave.

Why so early?, What just happened? I knew this would possibly be the last time I would see her in real life. I did luckily get her pinterest cause that's the only place I can contact her plus another game we both play. I was heartbroken, it was raining outside. I was walking around the entire house having constant memories. I checked the room she slept in, she was not there anymore. It was so quiet, I cried on the couch and went back to my room crying. I ignored my parents, I though she left because she simply had to and she had no other choice. Didn't even have the chance to celebrate her birthday..

But it turns out that my parents chosed to send her away earlier, thinking it was "for the better" I am honestly tired of them. They lied about her, they hurted her mentally, I almost want to kill them. But that's not the right choice, better get myself gone instead.
We were typing to each other on pinterest and It's already chaos at her home, her mom doesn't care about anything..

We typed messages leaving us in tears. I don't really believe that there is an afterlife but if there is, I wanna go with her forever.
She seems to also be planning to ctb someday, but she doesn't know when.
I see her as a gift. And she will be the first to know when I am gonna attempt partial hanging.

 

[MrDarkness]

I'm on the verge of tears reading this, I'm so sorry that had to happen, I hope you able to meet again in life or death, I have so many people I want to see again so many, but they are gone not dead I think, but I won't ever find them again, maybe in death. I'm so sorry. That's tragic

 

[FuneralCry]

To me it's so awful how humans are so cruel in this world but anyway at least you have someone who accepts your wish to die, I think it's rare that there are people like that in this anti-suicide society. But anyway best wishes.