cylus46
Member
- Jan 28, 2025
- 97
I hit the last big age milestone in my life. Life been nothing but pain and temporary happiness always ended with more pain.
I haven't been active on here since my semester at college started, I work 60 hours and commute 2 hours back n fourth im broke but im paying that tuition somehow...I got a girlfriend, shes ok...im not really ecstatically happy with her but I think thats just me and my own issues because shes great and treats me ok. My appendix almost blew up and I almost died so I lost alot kf muscle mass which for me is hard because my body is my temple and muscle is what I project to hide my suicidal tendencies but now im half the size- still decently muscular but no where near my prime.
All around college is whatever im just kind of going through the motions but learning psychology is fun ngl. I dont think im ready to end it now but im not really excited for life either. I see a therapist on Friday and I dont know where to start. I got 21 years of abuse and trauma to dump and im ready for one thing to go wrong before I potentially decide to ctb. But thats just my update I hope everyone else is thuggin it out :)
I haven't been active on here since my semester at college started, I work 60 hours and commute 2 hours back n fourth im broke but im paying that tuition somehow...I got a girlfriend, shes ok...im not really ecstatically happy with her but I think thats just me and my own issues because shes great and treats me ok. My appendix almost blew up and I almost died so I lost alot kf muscle mass which for me is hard because my body is my temple and muscle is what I project to hide my suicidal tendencies but now im half the size- still decently muscular but no where near my prime.
All around college is whatever im just kind of going through the motions but learning psychology is fun ngl. I dont think im ready to end it now but im not really excited for life either. I see a therapist on Friday and I dont know where to start. I got 21 years of abuse and trauma to dump and im ready for one thing to go wrong before I potentially decide to ctb. But thats just my update I hope everyone else is thuggin it out :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ( belated? )
