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citadelofme

Member
Sep 29, 2024
8
i know that it is selfish to want to be hit by a train, i know that it can cause trauma to other people. there are not many ways i can think of to ctb in australia (especially since i am in perth which is mostly isolated from the most popular parts of australia)

SN seems impossible to get my hands on, as well as me being unemployed so definutely not enough money to be able to afford everything id need. i have no access to any guns, hanging myself seems too slow and painful. i am scared of failing and being put in a psych ward if i overdose and then fail. jumping from a high place seems like there is too much of a chance of me failing and being permanently paralysed and then life would be a million times more shitty than it already is. slitting my wrists seems like too high of a chance of failure. if anyone even suspects me being suicidal i will probably be sent to a psych ward immediately, i have beeing cutting and burning myself since i was 9 and everyone knows that so i am constantly being treated like i am "sick" and they are constantly watching out for me.

there are train tracks within walking distance of me, they are almost completely uncovered so it would be pretty easy to walk in front of a train or lay down on the tracks. i assume that i am less likely to die if i walk in front of the train near the station as the train will slow down and there will be lots of people around.

there are parts in the middleish of the tracks where i can climb over a pretty short fence (probably like double my height but i would still be able to climb over it pretty easily) i have not checked if there are employees or anyone who would catch me climbing the fence but i will check the next time im near the tracks. the side that i can climb over is hidden by trees and people in the houses near the tracks would not be able to see me. if im in the middleish of the tracks the train will be going its fastest im assuming (online it says the top speed of the train im looking for is around 110 km/h).

i do not know if that will be enough to kill me, hard to find stuff online as it seems as google is trying to keep me alive haha.

i wonder if it is more effective to walk in front of the train or lay down on the tracks, i fear that if i lay down on the tracks it would be too obvious and too much of a risk of being caught. ive heard jumping in front of the train is less effective.

i will try and find more stuff about the train i am hoping to be hit by, i am planning to die before 2026/2027 so i guess i have a while im just trying to find the most effective way to die.
 
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lebrodude

Arcanist
Jul 18, 2022
489
A train going at that speed is as good as guaranteed to kill you as you can get with train suicide afaik.
Reason I'd never choose this method is I'd never want to traumatise the driver however I get people get desperate.

Plus surviving that method isn't worth the risk either tbh.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do.
 
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annen

New Member
Oct 24, 2024
3
It's not just the traumatizing, but think about your last act being making everyone late to where they are going, all the hate you'll get (deserved or not, I'm not judging). In the end, it's up to you of course but seeking a better way for a while, continuing the misery to spare others one, doesn't sound too bad, does it?
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,930
I hope that you find what you are searching for, it just feels so cruel to me how painless, guaranteed methods are made inaccessible and instead there is all this suffering, trying to die leading to way worse agony is what I fear as well but anyway I wish you the best.
 
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citadelofme

Member
Sep 29, 2024
8
I hope that you find what you are searching for, it just feels so cruel to me how painless, guaranteed methods are made inaccessible and instead there is all this suffering, trying to die leading to way worse agony is what I fear as well but anyway I wish you the best.
i agree, i wish there was an easy painless way to go that wouldnt traumatize anyone. nobody else would be hurt if they would just let me die easily
It's not just the traumatizing, but think about your last act being making everyone late to where they are going, all the hate you'll get (deserved or not, I'm not judging). In the end, it's up to you of course but seeking a better way for a while, continuing the misery to spare others one, doesn't sound too bad, does it?
most people hate me either way, it sounds selfish but i really dont care if i traumatise other people when i die, i just hope that one day there is an accessible, guarenteed way to die so that people wont have to traumatise others just to leave this life
 
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NegevChina

NegevChina

Student
Sep 5, 2024
134
The tracks connecting city's near my city are all protected by this fence but it is unclaimable due to the spaces being to small to put a shoe through. I can use a ladder though it would be to risky and I might break a leg and fail my attempt. So I'm considering jumping from a building instead.
 
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Unspoken7612

Specialist
Jul 14, 2024
333
It sounds like you have put a lot of thought into this.

I have too, and I wouldn't feel comfortable giving advice - but our thoughts are very similar.

What I will say is to make sure you are identifiable. I feel comfortable saying this because it isn't giving advice on making the suicide more likely to succeed, only on how to be considerate to others. Leave a bag by the side of the tracks containing a form of ID and a note, in which, among other things, you should reassure the driver that you intended to commit suicide, that you had a settled desire (it wasn't impulsive), and that you're sorry for the impact this might have had. Also include contact details for your family, whoever that may be (if you're not close with your birth family then it can be a found family).
 
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lastboyscout

lastboyscout

Aint Life a Bitch
Sep 23, 2024
61
i agree, i wish there was an easy painless way to go that wouldnt traumatize anyone. nobody else would be hurt if they would just let me die easily

most people hate me either way, it sounds selfish but i really dont care if i traumatise other people when i die, i just hope that one day there is an accessible, guarenteed way to die so that people wont have to traumatise others just to leave this life

Between train or jumping i dont see whats better or worse.
Train can traumatize driver and make people late wherever they were going, Jumping can hit a person or damage a car passing by
On both there is a high level of violence.. taking that final step sure is no easy peasy.... at least for me

One thing i am sure, it aint fair a World that instead of letting people get out of it with dignity , leaves them with no much better options than having to smash their bodies if they want to stop suffering ... or instead searching metoclopramide for all eternity 😕
 
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Coringa

Coringa

Member
Mar 19, 2024
60
Train is very difficult because of the SI which will be huge.
 
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citadelofme

Member
Sep 29, 2024
8
Train is very difficult because of the SI which will be huge.
how will the SI stop me? SI is survival instinct right? but survival instinct wont stop the train from killing me?
 
TimetoGo!

TimetoGo!

Wizard
Aug 30, 2022
615
how will the SI stop me? SI is survival instinct right? but survival instinct wont stop the train from killing me?
Walk down to the tracks and stand there, observe a train going by and just picture yourself actually walking onto those tracks…….its the hardest thing a human can do. I've been there a few times and struggled to do it
 
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lastboyscout

lastboyscout

Aint Life a Bitch
Sep 23, 2024
61
how will the SI stop me? SI is survival instinct right? but survival instinct wont stop the train from killing me?
maybe can try to prevent you from crossing into the front of the train.. Using that method i would probably park the car next to a railroad entrance and when i see the train coming would cross to the other side walking normally (no rush and neither slow) and make to be on the middle of the line at same time the train gets there

This method requires brave personality plus 2 grams of potent white powder (considered a luxury in the protocol but it helps) :smiling:
 

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