I came across this video, and it has been lingering on my mind the past few days. I've read quite a few topics on the subject, but actually seeing it in a video gave me chills that I find it hard to shake. Despite harboring thoughts of CTB, I never find it easy hearing or seeing someone else catching their own bus. I guess many of us fantasize and plan about leaving in the calmest, most peaceful manner. Looking at how abrupt, distressing and violent Vanessa's death came, really threw me a rush of emotions. It's heartbreaking to see how bad her suffering must be, and how desperate she was, to make that decision to do what she did.
I came across this video, and it has been lingering on my mind the past few days. I've read quite a few topics on the subject, but actually seeing it in a video gave me chills that I find it hard to shake. Despite harboring thoughts of CTB, I never find it easy hearing or seeing someone else catching their own bus. I guess many of us fantasize and plan about leaving in the calmest, most peaceful manner. Looking at how abrupt, distressing and violent Vanessa's death came, really threw me a rush of emotions. It's heartbreaking to see how bad her suffering must be, and how desperate she was, to make that decision to do what she did.
Woah :(
that first guy was like back up some weird shits going down
what a heavy weight they must carry, eugh
that first guy was like back up some weird shits going down
what a heavy weight they must carry, eugh
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faust
lost among the stars
- Jan 26, 2020
- 3,138
Cops will remember all their lives this welfare check...But I have to admit that was her decision, maybe she had no strengths to do that on her own or maybe wanted to be killed...
Whale_bones
Experienced
- Feb 11, 2020
- 269
Considering what she had was only a BB gun, I severely doubt she planned to CTB like this. She was clearly in a terrible mental state to start with, that's obvious just by looking at the bed she's lying in. Then it was her landlord that called the cops, she didn't know they were going to show up and order her to the hospital, so it was a split-second decision for her to pick up that BB gun.
Whatever thoughts about suicide she may have had before this, I think this was an instant decision made out of panic. Definitely a horrific way to go, both for her and for those cops; imagine the horror they felt when they realized her gun wasn't even real. I just hope she's at peace now.
Whatever thoughts about suicide she may have had before this, I think this was an instant decision made out of panic. Definitely a horrific way to go, both for her and for those cops; imagine the horror they felt when they realized her gun wasn't even real. I just hope she's at peace now.
Perhaps she was delusional and perceived the police as a threat? Perhaps in that delusional state, she reached for her fake gun to protect herself? Perhaps the police should not have fired at a person who was obviously suffering from a mental health issue and has a distorted perception of reality?
....although maybe not the best decision. Actually theres too much to take into account here obviously she wasn't thinking right, at the time, or maybe she was and was why she had a bb gun. I've honestly no idea but the cop who fired the shot(s) will remember the rest of his life, kinda seems like throwing yourself in front of a train to me. Like okay but don't scar peoples minds
edit: I just wish they could offer some help, like anything, idk I'm talking out my ass
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faust
lost among the stars
- Jan 26, 2020
- 3,138
She haid on video "Kill me" so probably she really wanted to be killed. Impulsively or not
Yes that's right, I only watched it once. I recall that scene now. Given that she had worded those statements, kill me. Then I can see how that may have been indeed her wish. However , She did not seem "all there."
maybe she heard the cops were being called and kinda went well fuck it, I agree she didn't seem 'all there'
She also took off the orange cap that's put on the end of the barrel specifically to avoid scenarios like and exactly like this happening. You only do that for two reasons: 1. You want to get shot by the cops thinking it's real
2. You want someone to think they're about to get shot by a real gun
It's just a shame they don't allow someone with obvious mental heath just be put down
keiichidono
Suicidey
- Mar 10, 2020
- 19
Does anyone here think the cops were within their rights to show up at her house with guns, tell her she's being arrested to go to a mental hospital then shoot her to death?
Honestly fuck these cops I hope they never have another decent night of sleep.
She was just existing, maybe her room was messy and she was anxious about police in her home but she was just existing.
What was her crime? Did she deserve the death penalty?
I would do the same exact thing if a cop broke into my house for a wellness check. It's like being swatted.
Honestly fuck these cops I hope they never have another decent night of sleep.
She was just existing, maybe her room was messy and she was anxious about police in her home but she was just existing.
What was her crime? Did she deserve the death penalty?
I would do the same exact thing if a cop broke into my house for a wellness check. It's like being swatted.
Another part of this story that seems to only be talked about in epilepsy communities is the fact that the police said they witnessed her having seizures when they arrived. During a postictal state people can be confused, combative, or even go into postictal psychosis. It's very possible she was so mentally altered she didn't know what was happening. Unfortunately very few police are trained on seizures enough to have that knowledge.
Saddening situation whether she meant For herself to be killed or not.
Saddening situation whether she meant For herself to be killed or not.
