to people that live a somewhat active life outside of here...

[tsumihoroboshi]

if you have OCD and general intrusive thoughts maybe don't read because i don't wanna trigger any paranoia with this but...

how do you guys leave the house? to go to jobs? to just get outside? go to the store?

i am extremely scared of getting murdered by someone. how do you not deal with the fear of being murdered?
i guess bcus we're all suicidal but... i still can't do it. i'd want it to be at my own hands, not someone else's.
i can't remember what triggered my agoraphobia but i havent left the house since i was a teenager *2 decades ago...yeesh.

i've left to go to appointments and see family and that's it. that's months and months apart and i always had another family member take me. i cannot leave alone. i'm too scared of being murdered. i look up crime statistics daily and where i live murder isn't common and hasn't been for years but i can't stop the fear. even walking to the mailbox terrifies me but i've been getting help with it slowly.

idk how people just go on with their lives like that. walking places alone. driving alone. is it because you plan to ctb anyway so being murdered is nbd? i could accomplish going so many places if i didn't have this horrible fear. AND YES i've been told "well someone can just break into your house and kill you", yes i have many defensive weapons for such cases but i fear that less since i am already at home?

my mom watches true-crime like all the time and has had friends and known people that have been killed and i've asked her this and how she can still leave the house and she just says "well i have to work". this isn't enough for me. my brain will not let me stop obsessing over this forever.

sorry if this is extremely off-topic and incoherent i don't really have the clearest frame of mind rn.

 

[Apathy79]

With murder specifically, I think the odds of getting murdered in my country in an entire normal human lifetime of daily activity is something like 1 in 200. In a single day of that lifetime, it's like 1 in 6 million. And 99% of those are people known to the person killed, not some random. So in the extraordinarily unlikely scenario you're ever going to be murdered by anyone, it's almost certainly going to be by the person you're going out with rather than some random you encounter along the way. At least that's the case in relatively safe countries.

I guess I think of it the same way as I could get struck by lightning on a sunny day, or attacked by a swarm of bees out of nowhere, all sorts of horrible things are conceivable, but they're so unlikely the fear of them is not going to stop me doing things I enjoy. There's risks every way of doing things. I would guess the probability of a shut in slipping and cracking their skull in the bathroom on any given day is probably 100s of times greater than the chance of them being murdered if they went outside. I'd also be confident they'd have a far lower life expectancy as a result of staying inside so much.

Unless you're in a severely war torn or largely lawless location, my hunch is the greater risk to your health and longevity, not to mention life enjoyment, is staying in. But that's only answering the rational level. As for the crippling anxiety when you actually do it, I think the best way to get through it is by gradual exposure. If you can't go all the way to the mailbox today, just take a step out. That's a win. If you're comfortable sitting behind the window looking out, maybe you can become comfortable sitting in front of it. The more experiences you get of taking little steps and not dying, the easier it becomes to take one more.

 

[darkandtwisty]

Honestly, I don't even think about it. It never occurs to me except after dark or when I'm out by myself and there's men. Remember the question of if you're in a forest with a bear or a man, whom are you afraid of? The man 100%.

 

[LastDayOnEarth]

Im not scared of being murdered because I wanna be murdered

 

[alwaysalone]

if you have OCD and general intrusive thoughts maybe don't read because i don't wanna trigger any paranoia with this but...

how do you guys leave the house? to go to jobs? to just get outside? go to the store?

i am extremely scared of getting murdered by someone. how do you not deal with the fear of being murdered?
i guess bcus we're all suicidal but... i still can't do it. i'd want it to be at my own hands, not someone else's.
i can't remember what triggered my agoraphobia but i havent left the house since i was a teenager *2 decades ago...yeesh.

i've left to go to appointments and see family and that's it. that's months and months apart and i always had another family member take me. i cannot leave alone. i'm too scared of being murdered. i look up crime statistics daily and where i live murder isn't common and hasn't been for years but i can't stop the fear. even walking to the mailbox terrifies me but i've been getting help with it slowly.

idk how people just go on with their lives like that. walking places alone. driving alone. is it because you plan to ctb anyway so being murdered is nbd? i could accomplish going so many places if i didn't have this horrible fear. AND YES i've been told "well someone can just break into your house and kill you", yes i have many defensive weapons for such cases but i fear that less since i am already at home?

my mom watches true-crime like all the time and has had friends and known people that have been killed and i've asked her this and how she can still leave the house and she just says "well i have to work". this isn't enough for me. my brain will not let me stop obsessing over this forever.

sorry if this is extremely off-topic and incoherent i don't really have the clearest frame of mind rn.

Personally I carry 24/7 I've also lived long enough to know most thugs are talk. I've never been scared to go out alone. To be fair I don't live in a crime riddled area but there have been murders. You have to realize logically that most murders are committed by someone the victim knows. If you don't live a high risk life style your chances of being murdered even in an urban area are fairly slim.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I'm not afraid of being murdered or in the wider sense of being injured or having an accident when I go outside. Unless you live in a war zone or a very dangerous country it's very unlikely to be murdered.

i can't remember what triggered my agoraphobia but i havent left the house since i was a teenager *2 decades ago...yeesh.

Maybe this?

my mom watches true-crime like all the time

Could it be the case that you also watched true crime stuff together with her at a very young age already and that might have triggered the fear of being murdered?

 

[tsumihoroboshi]

Maybe this?

Could it be the case that you also watched true crime stuff together with her at a very young age already and that might have triggered the fear of being murdered?

I'VE WONDERED about it because we never watched these things together, my interest in true crime was separate to hers and i felt fine when was into it as a teen but i really think it definitely contributed to it because i can't think of any other reason (i was also raised on lifetime movies, so as someone stated above, it's a MUCH higher statistic to be killed by someone you know than a random, usually).

 

[lawlietsph]

my intrusive thoughts are only applying to others, never myself. meaning i'm more scared of hurting somebody than somebody hurting me. i would actually not mind at all if someone would kill me.
I've never felt any concern for myself, only my family members and pets.
But I get that it can be paralyzing for you and I am so sorry you have to suffer from this. OCD is one of the most terrible thing the human brain can do to itself...