Discussion To leave a note, or to not leave a note?

[Smashingairwaves]

Another thread about notes.

I am on the fence about leaving a note. I have so much to say, and I'm pretty crap at putting all my thoughts into coherent text. I just love to ramble.

I'm also one of those people who will say something, then want to keep adding to it. I'll forget to write something, and it'll bug me. It'll get to me that I'll die (hopefully this will work, and I will die) without saying all that I want to say. I have so, so much to say, and if I get everything out it'll take pages. I also have to deal with the consequences of what I have said if this doesn't work.

At the same time, I kinda wanna leave with a big 'fuck you' and have no note. Leave all questions unanswered.

I don't even know if anyone will pay attention to the letters I leave. No one has paid attention in an incredibly long time.

So are you all going to leave a note? What do you plan on writing in it? And where do you plan on leaving it?1

 

[Letmego. Please]

I have never done a note & never will, for one thing i am an awkward bugger but mostly because i could never hope to explain anything fully, so im not going to make anything worse by cocking that up.

 

[15dec]

I don't know.

I was originally going to leave a book of poetry alongside a long note about how I've been feeling, why I decided to ctb and an attempt to answer questions any of my loved ones may have left, as well as the entire plan for my funeral, cremation and what I want done with my ashes.

I would just go for no note and let people do whatever they want and think whatever they want. I don't think it makes much of a difference; they'll probably do that even if I leave the most concise and clear suicide note and requests for my funeral. Then again, this would just mean the inquest into my suicide is longer and more difficult for everybody involved (if anyone cares enough, hah). I also don't want them to 'make up' a reason for why I ctb, since that seems to be part of the process, and I don't want them deciding why I committed suicide because they'll pin the blame on one or two events that happened recently and I'd be viewed as having done it on impulse and not wanting to actually die, or having done it for attention.

I'll probably leave a short, very blunt note. Something along the lines of my main reasons for ctb without getting into so much detail it gets overanalysed and misinterpreted. I might ask not to have a funeral and to just be cremated or donated to science, maybe. I don't think my wishes will be respected if I'm honest so I'm not sure if I'll bother.

 

[2 be or not]

I will leave a note to police by my side explaining that the decision to end my life was mine alone; I was not coerced by anyone. The note left for police might not be seen by family members since they will probably keep it as evidence.

If you need to say 'fuck you' to someone, blame your suicide on him/her, your boss (or society). There will be a police investigation to corroborate your words.

I will leave additional notes at my residence, (I plan on exiting at a hotel) to my children repeating what I said to police and comforting them that they had no part in my decision reassuring them of my love for them.

 

[TheRiverStyz]

I used to think that leaving a note was a nice gesture, an attempt at closure for the ones left behind no matter how ineffective it may be. But then I read a blog post that said that leaving a note is obnoxious and pointless and that kind of resonates with me. So now I'm not sure what I'd do when the time comes.

 

[Retched]

I've written and turn up a bunch of them. What I have sort of sucks it sounds so.... bland? Idk. Seems like the right thing to do... but not expecting it to lessen any blows.

 

[21Neberg]

I'm going to be brutally honest - I'm such an emotional wreck that writing a suicide note is just impossible for me. That's why I probably won't do it, though I realize I should.

 

[Mylifeispointless]

Back then it crossed my mind to make a note with full of anger but it will be too long and it will only consist of alot of cursing. Then i think It will not matter anyway because life is unfair and have no justice. So i just decided to write a shorter note and said my goodbyes to them then everyone will be happy.

I have already written mine in two separate notes last year. One is hidden the other one was already read by my family from a failed ctb attempt. It's embarrassing and I'm fucking disappointed with myself. I failed at life and I failed at ctb too what the fuck. If you only knew my horror when i woke up and I'm still alive

Put on my happy mask through christmas and new years so they will not suspect i will attempt again. Ofcourse i don't want to ruin holidays for them too.

Now if i ctb I'm just gonna do it with no new notes. I hope they will think that it is not impulsive.



Edit: Maybe i will write one here on ss before i go. I don't know.

 

[Sixfeetunder]

Yes. But it will mostly be information such as how to contact my work. However, I will provide a brief explanation as to why I ctb (but not a full explanation). It's also to help get the police off my family's back. Hopefully they'll realize it was a suicide.

 

[StreamingMySuicide]

Every time I've attempted, I have left a long detailed note. This time when I attempt, I'm going to write a note that says.. "I'm happy, now.. - *name*"

 

[Xerxes]

The note on my body will be short, a few words, that's all. My longer note will be stored somewhere on the Internet, for those who known me well or should know me well, would know where to look for it.

 

[Asdr5633]

We want to die so that we don't have to worry about whatever happens after we're gone. As such, it feels a shame to spend so much time, effort, and worry thinking about how to best write a suicide note that will only have any effect after we're gone. I'd like to be able to finally stop worrying about the future in my last days, but of course it's not so simple. I'm still going back and forth with the idea.

 

[DeadlyLiving]

I am probably gonna write a note, I want to make it clear that no one could have saved me and no one is to blame. That might not be 100% true since my mother is basically the one that brought me to this point and never really cared about it when I told her I want to die, but I don't want my grandma to hate her because of it. I don't want anyone to suffer just because I want to end my suffering.

 

[StreamingMySuicide]

I am probably gonna write a note, I want to make it clear that no one could have saved me and no one is to blame. That might not be 100% true since my mother is basically the one that brought me to this point and never really cared about it when I told her I want to die, but I don't want my grandma to hate her because of it. I don't want anyone to suffer just because I want to end my suffering.

It's really hard to write a note that both is honest and doesn't blame... I don't know how many times my note said "I'm sorry" in it.

 

[ForestLove]

People can be hurtful and insensitive or chug it off when you told them you are depressed and/or suicidal.

I always believe Actions speak louder than words.

I will tell the persons who have hurt me coz they never believe how I feel and am in great pain and suffering.

Maybe jus leave a small note to my loved ones in general.

 

[LongSeason]

I will write a note but only to apologize for taking my life and to tell some people that I loved them.
I won't write about other details, they shall die with me.

 

[JustAboutDone]

I would go with no note - purely as sometimes it throws up more questions than it answers. In the uk if you leave a note it's more likely to be written as a suicide at your inquest as it's clear you intended the consequences of your actions whereas with no note it can be left as unexplained or a narrative verdict.

 

[Taylored]

I'm unsure exactly on should I write a note or not leave a note. Depending on my method I could do either I don't exactly want to write a note because I can't explain my thoughts.

 

[RyanSuicide]

I would not write a note as that can cause procrastination and may make you think about reasons to live

 

[ParamitePie]

I've written a note, as I feel it would help them find closure. I remember reading a book by a crime scene investigator, where he said suicide notes and manifestos are basically all the same. I thought that was incredibly rude, to just dismiss the sentiments of the dead, but I suppose everyone just wants to tell their loved ones that it's not their fault, they were unwell for a long time, and can't see a way out. I think my note might be trite, but if it helps them understand how I got here, why I'm doing this and that it's purely my responsibility, it's worth doing.

 

[anonymous23x]

I will be compiling all the the evidence of corruption and injustice bullshit that i have gone through with the law, which has ruined me, and i will be sending that off to the news which will publish it. My evidence is so real that even a superior officer looked at it and decided to delete my records off their systems... However, thanks to the absolute bullshit that the law has put me through, when they were only on a call to find me because my friend said i was about to ctb... court records can never be deleted... so i believe that story deserves to ruin the corrupt bastards who brainlessly decided to accuse me of the worst of the worst.

I may also write a few personal notes to a few people

 

[TheCrow]

I will be compiling all the the evidence of corruption and injustice bullshit that i have gone through with the law, which has ruined me, and i will be sending that off to the news which will publish it. My evidence is so real that even a superior officer looked at it and decided to delete my records off their systems... However, thanks to the absolute bullshit that the law has put me through, when they were only on a call to find me because my friend said i was about to ctb... court records can never be deleted... so i believe that story deserves to ruin the corrupt bastards who brainlessly decided to accuse me of the worst of the worst.

I may also write a few personal notes to a few people

Good! What happened to you is bullshit.

 

[TheCrow]

How does this all work with the cops taking everything to eliminate foul play? Does anyone know? Do they take suicide notes? Do they give them back to family/friends?

 

[ThisIsTheEnd]

I'm not sure. Because no one cares about me now, and I'm still underaged, it's not likely they'll listen to it anyway, so I sometimes think about saying "Fuck 'em" and leaving nothing.

 

[stellabelle]

I doubt if I would leave a note. It's pretty self explanatory and I will likely do it impulsively instead of being well drawn out an planned. I like that freedom in a sense.

 

[Ldog9]

I need to write a note to try and absolve my family and old friends of any guilt or regret and say one last apology for this latest act of selfishness. To let them know that I was in insufferable pain for to long and that I'm now at peace. It wasn't their fault, I know they tried their best and they did all they could. I'm grateful for that.

Someone finding out a loved one committed suicide (or the trauma of finding your body) is devastating, if taking the time to write a note out (even if it's not all true!) can mitigate that pain even just a little, you gotta try.