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Eriktf

Warlock
Jun 1, 2023
702
I just don't function to do anything, so I live of social security so I'm not homeless or anything but that's just worse, no job, no school, what do I do I do fucking nothing.

I get no sleep then I'm awake, just awake, I can literally sit and see into the wall 24h straight then sleep 3h repeat.

I'm not in physical or emotional pain I just exist way out any meaning.

I cant find a single reason to live but I still live just to be a live and I'm tired of it.

I want to ctb but I also want to continue to live just to live wayou any meaning.

I just don't know what to do, should I just ctb now? should I wait? should I just live? idk.

I'm also too tired to do the things I must before ctb so that's something too, every time I get the checklist done I ether fail, or I don't do it.
 
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Aries

Aries

Student
Jun 14, 2023
109
Ohh my I wish I could be you. You get to sleep almost all day and are not homeless? You want a job and to study? I wish we could exchange places. Studying just brings out my worries that I'm probably not going to succeed. But if that's what drives you and motivates you, its your decision❤
 
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E

Eriktf

Warlock
Jun 1, 2023
702
Ohh my I wish I could be you. You get to sleep almost all day and are not homeless? You want a job and to study? I wish we could exchange places. Studying just brings out my worries that I'm probably not going to succeed. But if that's what drives you and motivates you, its your decision❤
sure i have time to sleep, but cant, its about 20h since my last 3h
Yeah I'm Not Homeless Since im Sick So Have Rights To Have Just enough to Pay rent
yes i wish i could work or study

sure i can have it worse but it aren't that great either
 
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outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,907
sure i have time to sleep, but cant, its about 20h since my last 3h
Yeah I'm Not Homeless Since im Sick So Have Rights To Have Just enough to Pay rent
yes i wish i could work or study

sure i can have it worse but it aren't that great either
Sorry you have insomnia--My sleep patterns have also drastically changed also in the last 18 months, can never sleep more than a few hours at a time
 
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90starve

90starve

i don’t know who i am
May 8, 2023
578
my situation doesn't seem as severe as yours - but i had been stuck between wanting to die and wanting to hang on just in case. although, i look to the future and i do not see any reason to continue. so to combat this, i decided to set a date and get to work on my method.

it's been 20 days since i chose my date now, and i feel pretty set in my decision to end my life when my date comes. it's helped me to become more comfortable with my thoughts, and im no longer stuck in an uneasy battle over suicide with my own mind.
 
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Eriktf

Warlock
Jun 1, 2023
702
my situation doesn't seem as severe as yours - but i had been stuck between wanting to die and wanting to hang on just in case. although, i look to the future and i do not see any reason to continue. so to combat this, i decided to set a date and get to work on my method.

it's been 20 days since i chose my date now, and i feel pretty set in my decision to end my life when my date comes. it's helped me to become more comfortable with my thoughts, and im no longer stuck in an uneasy battle over suicide with my own mind.
my date is always tomorrow, if it gets bad I'm almost always ready
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
45,948
I understand feeling so tired of everything, to me existing certainly is so dreadful.
 
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