Method Time to end it all

[William01]

Hello everyone,

I found this website not long ago.

Truth of my situation I'm 35 always been depressed the older I get the worse it gets. I've had some counselling and CBT therapy but hasn't really helped.

Throughout my life I was always backward shy. I attracted a lot of bullies in school. People who are suppose to be friends seem to wait until I make first move or other times just blank me. It's been the same pattern all my life.

I grew up not experiencing that first relationship (I was once referred to as a "thing"), school formal, University. When people seem to know about my issues they it makes them backtrack away from me. In my family all but one if my siblings are married off with children and I am the only one had home now with a parent requiring limited care (but it will increase as they get older). I have a brother who is not married but all seems to fall on me and don't get me wrong I do it but times I just don't feel like the energy to do it when my mood is bad.

I can describe it like dragging my body around but inside I died a long time ago and there's nothing left. It is hard seeing ppl my own age or bullies at school having achieved some whatbof normality in life.

I hate everything about myself. I'm told I am be on the ASD spectrum but thys no excuses I found never being able to fit in with people. Trying to maintain some relationships until the rejection gets too much I just break.

I've felt like this since school. I feel heart broken, devastated and hate life. I've felt suicidal fir a good while now too... I have compulsively done things I.e. over taken tablets, walk slow when crossing a road with a car coming fast toward me hoping it will hit me etc...

I do have a fear of death to an extent - but as I say the older I get the harder it is getting. Recently I wad persuaded to let my guard down by someone I knew and trusted so much to get a back massage. Ended up being sexually assaulted. I feel is like a punishment because ideally I wanted to be gone by now.

I have obtained a charcoal chimney starter burner thing and filles it with the charcoal from 3 disposable BBQs. I have a steel bucket. If I set light to it outside and wait until it goes like a grey colour almost as if it's out and pour the charcoal I to the steel bucket and bring it into my car leaving it on some kind of heat resistant covering (not sure what yet maybe price of wood or a stone flag). Then left it I believe it will generate a massive amount of carbonmonoxide gas. I'm not sure if it would melt anything in the car I.e. the front it or glove compartment? Cover the car in Ash? Or accidentally blow up?

It's an 11 litre bucket so big enough. Can anyone help out here. Would this be enough to put me to a forever sleep? Would it damage my car?

 

[Lone_Gray_Wolf]

I am no expert on this method, so in case you did not do it already, remember to check the megathread competent to that method.
About melting anything, it depends on the materials that are in contact with the hot element and how hot is it. If it is smoking and been off by hours, it should not melt anything.
When it comes to accidently blowing up, it should not, the chance is very low but keep in mind where is the fuel compartment. The chances of it blowing up are low, very low, but if you are unsure, just put the hot elements as far as possible from the fuel tank. Consult the manual of your vehicle or search on internet for information on that.

Best of luck.

 

[Lifeispointless]

1 kg is supposed to be enough to kill in a small space. So just use way more to be safe. And make sure not a lot of oxygen can get in very fast. I'm doing some tests tomorrow with the charcoal method and I plan on using 3 chimney starters worth.

 

[Apricity]

We can provide facts, but not advice, on methods. This method with for sure cause damage to the inside of your vehicle, even just from the smell it leaves behind.

 

[chocolatebar]

Your story resonates with mine so much, it's hurtful to read. And the parent requiring care... it's like the last nail in our coffin...
About your recent experience, this is by no means some sort of punishment. You didn't deserve what happened to you. No one deserves it.

If I wrote something weird, just ignore me. I'm not feeling well

 

[William01]

We can provide facts, but not advice, on methods. This method with for sure cause damage to the inside of your vehicle, even just from the smell it leaves behind.

Even with no smoke coming from it? Perhaps then I should rent private cabin and do it in a small room

Your story resonates with mine so much, it's hurtful to read. And the parent requiring care... it's like the last nail in our coffin...
About your recent experience, this is by no means some sort of punishment. You didn't deserve what happened to you. No one deserves it.

If I wrote something weird, just ignore me. I'm not feeling well

Thx form response. It's good in a way to know others can relate x

1 kg is supposed to be enough to kill in a small space. So just use way more to be safe. And make sure not a lot of oxygen can get in very fast. I'm doing some tests tomorrow with the charcoal method and I plan on using 3 chimney starters worth.

Good point.

1 kg is supposed to be enough to kill in a small space. So just use way more to be safe. And make sure not a lot of oxygen can get in very fast. I'm doing some tests tomorrow with the charcoal method and I plan on using 3 chimney starters worth.

Good point I don't want to go to all that effort and survive it. OK I should get more charcoal and chimney starters. Problem is in uk not much bbqs at min it's very cold here at min. I ordered first chimney starter online and have to do rest of them online. Only thing is I get the whole "whats that in the box" vrap from family which I hate. Can you let me know how your tests go? I'm thinking maybe I should do I a rented private cabin instead but that would require more charcoal... don't want to leave any damage to car in anyway or do it at home as I'll risk harming others and have parent find me.

I am no expert on this method, so in case you did not do it already, remember to check the megathread competent to that method.
About melting anything, it depends on the materials that are in contact with the hot element and how hot is it. If it is smoking and been off by hours, it should not melt anything.
When it comes to accidently blowing up, it should not, the chance is very low but keep in mind where is the fuel compartment. The chances of it blowing up are low, very low, but if you are unsure, just put the hot elements as far as possible from the fuel tank. Consult the manual of your vehicle or search on internet for information on that.

Best of luck.

Thx for advice.

 

[Apricity]

Burning charcoal still emits a smell, even if there's no smoke.

 

[Labean]

Мое сердце разрывается от твоих забот, хотя я тоже сгорел внутри, ты коснулся последних струн моей души. Какой бы путь вы ни выбрали, я желаю вам обрести покой.

 

[FuneralCry]

That is not my method, so I do not know anything about it. It sounds like you have been through a lot, being alive really is horrible. I'm sorry you are suffering. I wish you the best with your plans and I hope you find the peace you are looking for.

 

[Lifeispointless]

Even with no smoke coming from it? Perhaps then I should rent private cabin and do it in a small room

Thx form response. It's good in a way to know others can relate x

Good point.

Good point I don't want to go to all that effort and survive it. OK I should get more charcoal and chimney starters. Problem is in uk not much bbqs at min it's very cold here at min. I ordered first chimney starter online and have to do rest of them online. Only thing is I get the whole "whats that in the box" vrap from family which I hate. Can you let me know how your tests go? I'm thinking maybe I should do I a rented private cabin instead but that would require more charcoal... don't want to leave any damage to car in anyway or do it at home as I'll risk harming others and have parent find me.

Thx for advice.

Hello everyone,

I found this website not long ago.

Truth of my situation I'm 35 always been depressed the older I get the worse it gets. I've had some counselling and CBT therapy but hasn't really helped.

Throughout my life I was always backward shy. I attracted a lot of bullies in school. People who are suppose to be friends seem to wait until I make first move or other times just blank me. It's been the same pattern all my life.

I grew up not experiencing that first relationship (I was once referred to as a "thing"), school formal, University. When people seem to know about my issues they it makes them backtrack away from me. In my family all but one if my siblings are married off with children and I am the only one had home now with a parent requiring limited care (but it will increase as they get older). I have a brother who is not married but all seems to fall on me and don't get me wrong I do it but times I just don't feel like the energy to do it when my mood is bad.

I can describe it like dragging my body around but inside I died a long time ago and there's nothing left. It is hard seeing ppl my own age or bullies at school having achieved some whatbof normality in life.

I hate everything about myself. I'm told I am be on the ASD spectrum but thys no excuses I found never being able to fit in with people. Trying to maintain some relationships until the rejection gets too much I just break.

I've felt like this since school. I feel heart broken, devastated and hate life. I've felt suicidal fir a good while now too... I have compulsively done things I.e. over taken tablets, walk slow when crossing a road with a car coming fast toward me hoping it will hit me etc...

I do have a fear of death to an extent - but as I say the older I get the harder it is getting. Recently I wad persuaded to let my guard down by someone I knew and trusted so much to get a back massage. Ended up being sexually assaulted. I feel is like a punishment because ideally I wanted to be gone by now.

I have obtained a charcoal chimney starter burner thing and filles it with the charcoal from 3 disposable BBQs. I have a steel bucket. If I set light to it outside and wait until it goes like a grey colour almost as if it's out and pour the charcoal I to the steel bucket and bring it into my car leaving it on some kind of heat resistant covering (not sure what yet maybe price of wood or a stone flag). Then left it I believe it will generate a massive amount of carbonmonoxide gas. I'm not sure if it would melt anything in the car I.e. the front it or glove compartment? Cover the car in Ash? Or accidentally blow up?

It's an 11 litre bucket so big enough. Can anyone help out here. Would this be enough to put me to a forever sleep? Would it damage my car?

I tested my charcoal and I couldn't get it to stop smoking. I burned it for almost an hour and a half and it was almost completely reduced to ash but it was still smoking

 

[William01]

I tested my charcoal and I couldn't get it to stop smoking. I burned it for almost an hour and a half and it was almost completely reduced to ash but it was still smoking

Did you try spreading out the coals on the tray/buck from the chimney starter giving it more room to hopefully stop smoking? What's your thinking now then? A rented cabin would no good because of fire alarm detecting smoke....

Did you try spreading out the coals on the tray/buck from the chimney starter giving it more room to hopefully stop smoking? What's your thinking now then? A rented cabin would no good because of fire alarm detecting

 

[FromGermany]

This was my method for a long time. I had everything I need here at my home. Then I have discovered, how unpredictable it is and how painful it can be, You have probably a 60 % chance of success. There is a risk of amputation and brain damage, which starts a few days later, after you failed.

In my test runs I was shocked, despite doing all right, using the best coals, the coals at once die or did not die. It's like gambling. You need at least 2.500 ppm CO constantly over hours. If you are lucky, you will die after one hour, most likely not before 3 hours. Some people just don't die and wake up later with such a pain for days or even for the rest of their lives. I know that from a criminal case here in Germany. You must ensure not to put anybody else into danger.

It is only peaceful if it comes very slowly while you are sleeping. Ensuring that is almost impossible with coals.

No one will be able to get the 10.000 ppm to die within 3 minutes. Not even with the acid mixture it's possible. One person tried it, filmed it. He did not came over 7.000 ppm or so in his car and died only after 40 minutes or so even with this high ppm.

I have now switched to Nitrogen. Of course, there is also a risk of brain damage, really bad brain damage. but aside handling SI there is no gambling. If there are no problems, within 15-60 seconds one will pass out piecefully and will die within 15 minutes. If there is a very small O2 problem, one will pass out within 2 minutes and die within 60 minutes.

CO2 can never be a problem when the flow rate is at 20 Liter/Minute.

As long as I am unable to get N, this will be my method.

 

[William01]

I tested my charcoal and I couldn't get it to stop smoking. I burned it for almost an hour and a half and it was almost completely reduced to ash but it was still smoking

This was my method for a long time. I had everything I need here at my home. Then I have discovered, how unpredictable it is and how painful it can be, You have probably a 60 % chance of success. There is a risk of amputation and brain damage, which starts a few days later, after you failed.

In my test runs I was shocked, despite doing all right, using the best coals, the coals at once die or did not die. It's like gambling. You need at least 2.500 ppm CO constantly over hours. If you are lucky, you will die after one hour, most likely not before 3 hours. Some people just don't die and wake up later with such a pain for days or even for the rest of their lives. I know that from a criminal case here in Germany. You must ensure not to put anybody else into danger.

It is only peaceful if it comes very slowly while you are sleeping. Ensuring that is almost impossible with coals.

No one will be able to get the 10.000 ppm to die within 3 minutes. Not even with the acid mixture it's possible. One person tried it, filmed it. He did not came over 7.000 ppm or so in his car and died only after 40 minutes or so even with this high ppm.

I have now switched to Nitrogen. Of course, there is also a risk of brain damage, really bad brain damage. but aside handling SI there is no gambling. If there are no problems, within 15-60 seconds one will pass out piecefully and will die within 15 minutes. If there is a very small O2 problem, one will pass out within 2 minutes and die within 60 minutes.

CO2 can never be a problem when the flow rate is at 20 Liter/Minute.

As long as I am unable to get N, this will be my method.

This really saddens me to read this - that it's more complex than I first thought.

Can I ask about the Nitrigen method I once briefly researched it - is that the body thinks you are breathing oxygen so you don't gasp for air and drift into unconsciousness... I'd it like an exit bag thing or do you fill a room or small space with Nitrogen?

This really saddens me to read this - that it's more complex than I first thought.

Can I ask about the Nitrigen method I once briefly researched it - is that the body thinks you are breathing oxygen so you don't gasp for air and drift into unconsciousness... I'd it like an exit bag thing or do you fill a room or small space with Nitrogen?

Is the Nitrogen purchased like stuff for ordinary parties ti full balloons?

 

[FromGermany]

Everything is described and answered here.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/exit-bag-and-inert-gas-megathread.8393/

 

[William01]

Everything is described and answered here.

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/exit-bag-and-inert-gas-megathread.8393/

Thx. I'll go thru but wish I had dump down version.
Also does anyone know is it forbidden on this to ask for locations i.e. to find out if others are in the same country or near you...

 

[William01]

Also does anyone know is it forbidden on this to ask for locations i.e. to find out if others are in the same country or near you...

 

[Auto Immunity After]

Thx. I'll go thru but wish I had dump down version.
Also does anyone know is it forbidden on this to ask for locations i.e. to find out if others are in the same country or near you...

lol ok so if you want the "dump down" version, just ask. Tell everyone what Country you are in and ask if anyone else reading your post is in the same country. EZPZ

 

[ENDOFTIME]

Hello everyone,

I found this website not long ago.

Truth of my situation I'm 35 always been depressed the older I get the worse it gets. I've had some counselling and CBT therapy but hasn't really helped.

Throughout my life I was always backward shy. I attracted a lot of bullies in school. People who are suppose to be friends seem to wait until I make first move or other times just blank me. It's been the same pattern all my life.

I grew up not experiencing that first relationship (I was once referred to as a "thing"), school formal, University. When people seem to know about my issues they it makes them backtrack away from me. In my family all but one if my siblings are married off with children and I am the only one had home now with a parent requiring limited care (but it will increase as they get older). I have a brother who is not married but all seems to fall on me and don't get me wrong I do it but times I just don't feel like the energy to do it when my mood is bad.

I can describe it like dragging my body around but inside I died a long time ago and there's nothing left. It is hard seeing ppl my own age or bullies at school having achieved some whatbof normality in life.

I hate everything about myself. I'm told I am be on the ASD spectrum but thys no excuses I found never being able to fit in with people. Trying to maintain some relationships until the rejection gets too much I just break.

I've felt like this since school. I feel heart broken, devastated and hate life. I've felt suicidal fir a good while now too... I have compulsively done things I.e. over taken tablets, walk slow when crossing a road with a car coming fast toward me hoping it will hit me etc...

I do have a fear of death to an extent - but as I say the older I get the harder it is getting. Recently I wad persuaded to let my guard down by someone I knew and trusted so much to get a back massage. Ended up being sexually assaulted. I feel is like a punishment because ideally I wanted to be gone by now.

I have obtained a charcoal chimney starter burner thing and filles it with the charcoal from 3 disposable BBQs. I have a steel bucket. If I set light to it outside and wait until it goes like a grey colour almost as if it's out and pour the charcoal I to the steel bucket and bring it into my car leaving it on some kind of heat resistant covering (not sure what yet maybe price of wood or a stone flag). Then left it I believe it will generate a massive amount of carbonmonoxide gas. I'm not sure if it would melt anything in the car I.e. the front it or glove compartment? Cover the car in Ash? Or accidentally blow up?

It's an 11 litre bucket so big enough. Can anyone help out here. Would this be enough to put me to a forever sleep? Would it damage my car?

I relate with over 90% of this ..... so much ..... sucks huh. Yeah, repeated injuries to the heart and soul are hard to heal.

 

[Someone123]

We can provide facts, but not advice, on methods. This method with for sure cause damage to the inside of your vehicle, even just from the smell it leaves behind.

I am really not sure exactly how to apply the idea that "we can supply facts but not advice" so I am trying to be as cautious as possible. I definitely have seen times where people are trying a method but not considering certain things that will likely cause it to fail- it's difficult to tell exactly where to draw the line in some cases. I am being cautious and trying to let people find out for themselves if something will fail, though sometimes I think maybe I should say more. For example, with SN if people can't get one medication they often ignore all the other advice in Stan's Guide and they usually fail and end up getting hospitalized, which often makes a person's situation worse. Maybe just referring them to Stan's Guide is ok. Other methods have similar pitfalls.

 

[William01]

lol ok so if you want the "dump down" version, just ask. Tell everyone what Country you are in and ask if anyone else reading your post is in the same country. EZPZ

Lol maybe you can give the dumb down version then so there will be margin for any error and this 100% success rate. I want to be able to follow something without too much detail something easy. The charcoal method past post has put me of it a bit as there is room for failure.

Just wondering is it ordinary for ppl to arrange to ctb together hence the country question. I already stated I am in UK I am in Northern Ireland

 

[FromGermany]

"I want to be able to follow something without too much detail something easy."

Such a method does not exist. Even with N one needs medication to ensure, not vomit the $600 out of the body after drinking it.

 

[Auto Immunity After]

Lol maybe you can give the dumb down version then so there will be margin for any error and this 100% success rate. I want to be able to follow something without too much detail something easy. The charcoal method past post has put me of it a bit as there is room for failure.

Just wondering is it ordinary for ppl to arrange to ctb together hence the country question. I already stated I am in UK I am in Northern Ireland

Yes, some people do partner up to ctb. All your questions and comments are welcome on this forum and the Search option can provide you with lots of information regarding specific methods.

 

[William01]

"I want to be able to follow something without too much detail something easy."

Such a method does not exist. Even with N one needs medication to ensure, not vomit the $600 out of the body after drinking it.

I've Benzos and other things that ain't a problem

I relate with over 90% of this ..... so much ..... sucks huh. Yeah, repeated injuries to the heart and soul are hard to heal.

How do you find the strenght to get up and go again?

 

[ENDOFTIME]

I've Benzos and other things that ain't a problem

How do you find the strenght to get up and go again?

Only because I am/was the only financial support for the family, but now that I have worked enough to garner medical benefits and a small pension and have finished the waiting period for insurance policies that will replace the need for me to be here and work ... I can now go ..... alcohol helped but my liver is now a bit worse for the wear ...

 

[William01]

So I'm not seeing the charcoal method as a good idea due to risk of failure.

before that I was researching hydrogen ssufpide idea. It seemingly started Japan. I know some countries don't have the same chemicals available so some have found an adequate substitutes and been successful at this method. Some go into science of it like ppm but personality I'd rather have too much than too little.

so idea is you mix hydrogen and sulfer together. Some have successful used a form of toilet cleanerd bath salts. However when I tried an experiment it failed to produce anything at all.

Does anyone have any ideas of better chemicals I should be considering please?