Time Stopped in 2012-2014

[TheGoodGuy]

TLDR; I just feel like time stopped back in 2012-2014 I got apathy in 2014 that got worse by each passing year, I had no social life anymore or care for love or hobbies not even smoking weed all because of apathy and it feels to me as if music from that era was the last to be released because when I listen to it now I feel like these songs literally just came out the same with certain games e.g. battlefield 4, GTA V, CS GO yet it was so long ago

I have had apathy for 5 years now that has gotten worse by each passing year now I really don´t feel anything but to me it also feels like time just stopped after 2012-2014 my life was over at that point I had lost all my friends from my teenage years I also think it´s important to say I was very addicted to Cannabis, from when I was 16 I smoked on and off in my off times I would bodybuild but the point with saying this is in 2014 I stopped smoking weed and I used to relapse and start smoking again for several years because nostalgia would hit me so hard especially on the days I called "relapse days" it´s usually on nice sunny days like a cool sunny day in autumn but for years I haven´t been able to feel that feeling anymore because I can´t feel emotions at least when I had depression I could feel it since nostalgia is a mixture between happiness and sadness and I haven´t been able to feel either for 5 years.
I tried smoking weed a year ago to try and recreate the feeling of my youth even the addiction part but I didn´t feel any emotions now I only got anxiety from it I then got kind of mad and desperately tried to get the feeling back by smoking every night for like a week but I still didn´t feel anything and I used to smoke so much that I would smoke a bowl on my bong every 30-45 minutes.

The point with this is that my life completely stopped back in 2012-2014 from then on there would be no more memorable experiences in my life not love (stopped caring about my looks because of apathy) and I had no friends anymore and because of apathy I have lost interest in anything that probably explains why I feel so many things like music, games and stuff like that just came out even though it was 5-7 years ago like the songs in the spoiler below.

Spoiler: 2012-2014 Music

I mean it literally feels like these songs just came out especially 'Swedish House Mafia Dont You Worry Child' since I feel nostalgic about that song I remember back when I heard that song what I was going through at the time but other songs like Katy Perry´s Roar or Dark horse I feel as if they came out recently but it´s been like 5-6 years that is completely insane to me I can´t even begin to understand where the time went I know the Swedish house mafia song was some time ago but not fucking 7 years!
And when Miley Cyrus Wrecking Ball came out I couldn´t believe my own eyes it was like the ultimate realization that not only her young teenage years were gone but mine too it felt like I lost a piece of me I know it sounds cheesy but that is how I felt I miss my youth so much and I watched her in Hannah Montana and still listen to those songs all the time and I guess I am just a man child that can´t accept that I will never be young again.

Also especially video games scares me to think about how old some of them are even though I feel like they just got released like Battlefield 4 which was the last Battlefield game I bought and I have been playing Battlefield since Battlefield 2, Bad Company 2, Battlefield 3 and of course Battlefield 4 and to think there have been released two new battlefield games (not including Hardline) it just mindboggling. It´s been 6 year since Battlefield 4 came out I can´t comprehend that because I still feel like it´s the last Battlefield game to be released and if I were to jump back in the game (like I have tried a few times the last years) I can´t understand how there are 2-3 more Battlefield games it doesn´t feel that way to me time really feel frozen back between 2012-2014
Also when I think of GTA V it feels like it came out maybe a year ago but it too came out 6 years ago

Anyone feel the same way as if time just stopped all those years ago? I even have this pic I found a while ago.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Really no one else feel this way?

 

[StillWaiting]

I get that feeling too.
Lost myself somewhere in the past.
Now everything I do just don't feel real anymore.

 

[Xaphous]

People I follow on YouTube say that all the time, and say time also feels sped up and not because of just getting older. Its always been the empty void for me with isolation but just the world increasingly fake and bland around that.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

I get that feeling too.
Lost myself somewhere in the past.
Now everything I do just don't feel real anymore.

Yeah it´s fucked up everything keeps moving forward while we are stuck in the past and in the example above with the Battlefield franchise I don´t even think the newer Battlefield games look anything like their predecessor.

People I follow on YouTube say that all the time, and say time also feels sped up and not because of just getting older. Its always been the empty void for me with isolation but just the world increasingly fake and bland around that.

I forgot to mention that but I have mentioned that too in other posts that I feel time is speed up like crazy I mean soon this year will be over years feels like months, months feels like weeks and weeks feels like days.

 

[StillWaiting]

Yeah it´s fucked up everything keeps moving forward while we are stuck in the past and in the example above with the Battlefield franchise I don´t even think the newer Battlefield games look anything like their predecessor..

Never played before Battlefield franchise so I can't remember how it was since the previous game release but for GTA V, I always wanted to play it and now you mentioned it, it is scary to know that it was released 6 years ago.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

but for GTA V, I always wanted to play it and now you mentioned it, it is scary to know that it was released 6 years ago.

Yeah right I feel like the game JUST came out yet it is over half a decade ago I just can´t wrap my head around it.

 

[Hexen]

Fuck man I feel the same way. I also feel bad when looking at some older game on youtube and the date says 2011 or even 2009. Its that sinking stomach feeling, its weird and I dont think I will get used to it. Like batman arkham asylum came out in 2009 I think? I feel like just yesterday I was drinking chocolate milk and sneaking with batman. Like you I also smoked weed in late teen years but I quit like 3-4 years ago. It gave me nothing but anxiety and bad feelings but there were some good times with weed I gotta sdmit. I had an ok childhood and a really good friend group. These days I only keep in touch with one friend from that group. Compared to the previous years life sucks and I have only lost more and I gained barely anything. I can really relate.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Fuck man I feel the same way. I also feel bad when looking at some older game on youtube and the date says 2011 or even 2009. Its that sinking stomach feeling, its weird and I dont think I will get used to it. Like batman arkham asylum came out in 2009 I think? I feel like just yesterday I was drinking chocolate milk and sneaking with batman. Like you I also smoked weed in late teen years but I quit like 3-4 years ago. It gave me nothing but anxiety and bad feelings but there were some good times with weed I gotta sdmit. I had an ok childhood and a really good friend group. These days I only keep in touch with one friend from that group. Compared to the previous years life sucks and I have only lost more and I gained barely anything. I can really relate.

Love that post I agree with all of it.
It is indeed the sinking stomach feeling when you watch a gameplay video and realize just how old the game really is and just in general realizing how long ago certains things was like Facebook memories (on this day setting) when I see a certain event happened 8-10 years ago that is so hard to see especially how much fun I used to have and also realizing I have not had any new memories in the last 7 years or so.

It really sucks with the weed because if it still felt as when I was a teen I would start smoking again immediately just to get to feel a little better but it only gives me anxiety now it also used to in the past the first day or two I started after a break so I always liked it more after building up a tolerance but it didn´t work anymore.

I also only have 1 friend left a childhood friend but we never hang out it´s been over a year since we hung out together but I know he would like to if I asked him but I have so many problems I don´t have any motivation for anything and I feel so under developed compared to him because I still feel like a teenager in many ways e.g. insecure, not very mature in regards of doing adult stuff. I am also very small in bone size I look nothing like a grown man.

 

[Sweet emotion]

Really no one else feel this way?

Oh I absolutely feel this way. I'm 34 and time stopped for me at 20 when I got Complex Regional Pain Syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history. I don't remember anything but pure misery and he'll after that. There was no happiness or good memories. I died at 20 and have been just existing. I know exactly how you feel. I'm not the person I used to be. I wish I could be but this has changed me forever.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Oh I absolutely feel this way. I'm 34 and time stopped for me at 20 when I got Complex Regional Pain Syndrome which is the highest ranking pain condition in medical history. I don't remember anything but pure misery and he'll after that. There was no happiness or good memories. I died at 20 and have been just existing. I know exactly how you feel. I'm not the person I used to be. I wish I could be but this has changed me forever.

It´s horrible to realize that you are no longer the same person you used to be not only looking older but personality too I feel the same that I am only existing now the real me died years ago now I am just an empty shell of the person I once was.

 

[Hexen]

Love that post I agree with all of it.
It is indeed the sinking stomach feeling when you watch a gameplay video and realize just how old the game really is and just in general realizing how long ago certains things was like Facebook memories (on this day setting) when I see a certain event happened 8-10 years ago that is so hard to see especially how much fun I used to have and also realizing I have not had any new memories in the last 7 years or so.

It really sucks with the weed because if it still felt as when I was a teen I would start smoking again immediately just to get to feel a little better but it only gives me anxiety now it also used to in the past the first day or two I started after a break so I always liked it more after building up a tolerance but it didn´t work anymore.

I also only have 1 friend left a childhood friend but we never hang out it´s been over a year since we hung out together but I know he would like to if I asked him but I have so many problems I don´t have any motivation for anything and I feel so under developed compared to him because I still feel like a teenager in many ways e.g. insecure, not very mature in regards of doing adult stuff. I am also very small in bone size I look nothing like a grown man.

Hah I feel like teenager too but I also feel somehow more mature. Sometimes I feel like a grandpa. I think it is ok to act like that even when you are old but we are still young.