Venting Thoughtlessness

[ms_beaverhousen]

Let me preface this and say I can see this not being a popular opinion, but nonetheless, it's my opinion.

This forum is becoming progressively more juvenile and increasely more painful to read as the days go on. I've tried to avoid it by ignoring the infantile users, but it's not fair that I should have to keep up with every new batch to block. (Plus their threads and replies still show up because an 'ignored user replied'.) The absurdity of some of these posts has been [and is] maddening.
Just sick of it...

I have sympathy for the diversity of mental challenges here, for the inexperienced and the virginal [etc] youth here; but I'm out of sympathy for the thoughtlessness that goes into a lot of these threads and replies. Sure, everyone comes here for attention and validation, but there are proper ways to go about doing so so we can at least appear as if we're trying to cling onto what dignity we have left as depressed and suicidal peoples. It's only tactful to remember others when you're putting out content that others will have to sift through to decide whether to further examine or dodge. It takes minimal effort to not be a nuisance, and create a duplicate and/or senseless post that is of low quality.

To me, there's nothing blissful or dreamlike about someone's suicide. It's horrific and tragic any time that happens. The level of pain that leads one to this act is obviously extraordinarily severe; and it'd be nice to see those facts not be undermined with blatant immaturity and flippant disregard left and right. It'd also be nice if some people would even consider what constitutes the point/message of their post before it becomes official. What is its purpose? Is it even serving that? (That takes a mere moment to decide.) Because the intent of some these posts are very questionable. It's not cool and it's just ridiculous.

On the contrary there are so many well-thought out and thought-provoking threads/replies that it's rather sad (and borderline insulting) to categorize them with some of these others. It's a shame that there are long-time lurkers here who often second-guess (and even end up deleting their postings) while others don't think twice before or after they post, from their sandboxes I presume.

Takeaway:
My fifth grade teacher used to often say, "Common sense goes a long way."

Thanks in advance.

 

[Namelesa]

I do think some of the responses on here can be a little unempathetic at times, tho I think some of those times people may just misunderstand or make a mistake while some others do want to be purposely mean. If I have done any of this or do this in the future, please criticize me. I don't want harm anyone here as most of us are already in great mental pain to be here to begin with.

 

[dragonofenvy]

While being a contrarian to people has burned me on this forum in the past, I'll decide to to so again and hopefully I won't get harassed this time around. You're more than welcome to disagree but I just ask you to do so in a nice way.

To defend the more juvenile posts as you put them, they are coming from a place from hurt as it seems you can understand. I don't think that every single post on this site needs to be thought-provoking or deep. Honestly, if it was that way, I'd have left ages ago. I don't want to have to sift through long, deep and "meaningful" posts. Sometimes there's someone hurting and they want to feel like they're not alone and just can't express it in a way that is "meaningful" as you put it. If every post is deep and meaningful, then none of them are. If deep conversations are what you're looking for, I don't think SS is the place to find them because the vast majority of users (and people in general) aren't capable, or don't want to engage in that.

Sure, everyone comes here for attention and validation, but there are proper ways to go about doing so so we can at least appear as if we're trying to cling onto what dignity we have left as depressed and suicidal peoples. It's only tactful to remember others when you're putting out content that others will have to sift through to decide whether to further examine or dodge. It takes minimal effort to not be a nuisance, and create a duplicate and/or senseless post that is of low quality.

Who gets to decide what is proper or not on this forum? Usually, for me it's pretty easy to tell what posts are not worth bothering with, because, well, I simply skim them and move on. It's no skin off my teeth that a post wasted 5 seconds of my life.

On the contrary there are so many well-thought out and thought-provoking threads/replies that it's rather sad (and borderline insulting) to categorize them with some of these others. It's a shame that there are long-time lurkers here who often second-guess (and even end up deleting their postings) while others don't think twice before or after they post, from their sandboxes I presume.

Just like every social media platform. Unfortunately, not everyone is going to behave in a way that is ideal for you. Some people, let's be honest, are just going to be plain stupid. Hell, if you took a random post that I made, I'm sure you'd find something that is so cringe-inducing that you'd think I'm a lobotomite. I get the messaging behind it asking for people to think before they post, but not everyone is at the same social competency. Some people like me have autism, and others are so damaged they have a very difficult time showing any emotional availability. I'm able to understand this, and I hope you are able to as well. Because I'll be totally honest with you, as you seem like a person who is open to criticism, this post comes across as a bit elitist.

 

[ms_beaverhousen]

While being a contrarian to people has burned me on this forum in the past, I'll decide to to so again and hopefully I won't get harassed this time around. You're more than welcome to disagree but I just ask you to do so in a nice way.

To defend the more juvenile posts as you put them, they are coming from a place from hurt as it seems you can understand. I don't think that every single post on this site needs to be thought-provoking or deep. Honestly, if it was that way, I'd have left ages ago. I don't want to have to sift through long, deep and "meaningful" posts. Sometimes there's someone hurting and they want to feel like they're not alone and just can't express it in a way that is "meaningful" as you put it. If every post is deep and meaningful, then none of them are. If deep conversations are what you're looking for, I don't think SS is the place to find them because the vast majority of users (and people in general) aren't capable, or don't want to engage in that.


Who gets to decide what is proper or not on this forum? Usually, for me it's pretty easy to tell what posts are not worth bothering with, because, well, I simply skim them and move on. It's no skin off my teeth that a post wasted 5 seconds of my life.

Just like every social media platform. Unfortunately, not everyone is going to behave in a way that is ideal for you. Some people, let's be honest, are just going to be plain stupid. Hell, if you took a random post that I made, I'm sure you'd find something that is so cringe-inducing that you'd think I'm a lobotomite. I get the messaging behind it asking for people to think before they post, but not everyone is at the same social competency. Some people like me have autism, and others are so damaged they have a very difficult time showing any emotional availability. I'm able to understand this, and I hope you are able to as well. Because I'll be totally honest with you, as you seem like a person who is open to criticism, this post comes across as a bit elitist.

I wasn't going to respond to this because I thought I gave enough forewarning and details to get my point across in a classifed 'Vent', but then I saw you used the word "elitist." Like I said... This is from my perspective and I tried to use certain details so that the overall concept was self-explanatory. I specifically didn't label it as a 'Discussion' because this is my perogative. I spoke in a broad manner. I realize that it's left open for interpretation, but only so much. You're making generalizations about things that I just didn't say... For instance:

--I thought I specified that I'm speaking for "some" of the posts, not all.
--I thought I covered that I do have sympathy for a variety of shortcomings, which would obviously include autism as it's widely regarded here. (Actually I think I've become more sympathetic to this trait in my time here because I wasn't aware of the notorious correlation between depression and autism. Hence their heavy online presence.)
--I tried to not choose words encompassing "all" posts because I'm not speaking of every post; I'm speaking of a select group/theme.
--I didn't say there should only be profound, thought-provoking posts written: I said use your head.
--I didn't demand only deep and proper writings; I made a sharp suggestion.

I spoke of my (personal) dissaproval, disappointment, and displeasure in reading material here. If people are allowed to be idiotic, then I'm allowed to call it out just the same. Just in the way you're allowed to decide to deem yourself a contrarian. It's fair play. Although I do find it odd that you're lecturing me about forum decor and saying my vent feels "elitist" all the while talking down to me in the same breath... Thanks for the condescension and the patronizing feedback, but no thanks.
You either get it, or you don't.

 

[dragonofenvy]

I wasn't going to respond to this because I thought I gave enough forewarning and details to get my point across in a classifed 'Vent', but then I saw you used the word "elitist." Like I said... This is from my perspective and I tried to use certain details so that the overall concept was self-explanatory. I specifically didn't label it as a 'Discussion' because this is my perogative. I spoke in a broad manner. I realize that it's left open for interpretation, but only so much. You're making generalizations about things that I just didn't say... For instance:

--I thought I specified that I'm speaking for "some" of the posts, not all.
--I thought I covered that I do have sympathy for a variety of shortcomings, which would obviously include autism as it's widely regarded here. (I've actually become more sympathetic to this trait in my time here because I wasn't aware of the notorious correlation between depression and autism. Hence their online presence.)
--I tried to not choose words encompassing "all" posts because I'm not speaking of every post; I'm speaking of a select group/theme.
--I didn't say there should only be profound, thought-provoking posts written: I said use your head.
--I didn't demand only deep and proper writings; I made a sharp suggestion.

I spoke of my (personal) dissaproval, disappointment, and displeasure in reading material here. If people are allowed to be idiotic, then I'm allowed to call it out just the same. Just in the way you're allowed to decide to deem yourself a contrarian. It's fair play. Although I do find it odd that you're lecturing me about forum decor and saying my vent feels "elitist" all the while talking down to me in the same breath... Thanks for the condescension and the patronizing feedback, but no thanks.
You either get it, or you don't.

Ah, I think I made a mistake in posting what I said. I didn't mean to be contradictory and rereading what I posted I see that it was pretty obvious how hypocritical I was being and apologize for that. I do think your response helped me better understand your perspective and I see that I agree with you in almost all points. I was having all-or-nothing thinking when I was writing that, when I shouldn't have and that is completely on me. I didn't intend to talk down to you, I was merely offering a perspective but I failed to phrase it in a respectful way. I'm glad you were able to respond to me respectfully as many people would go straight to insults were they in your situation and I thank you for it and again would like to apologize for my tone in my previous message.

 

[ms_beaverhousen]

Been there. It happens. No worries.

Likewise, I appreciate the civility. Hopefully more people than not get where I'm coming from. Although it's likely that the people who should read this Vent, won't; or worse, won't care.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Ah, I think I made a mistake in posting what I said. I didn't mean to be contradictory and rereading what I posted I see that it was pretty obvious how hypocritical I was being and apologize for that. I do think your response helped me better understand your perspective and I see that I agree with you in almost all points. I was having all-or-nothing thinking when I was writing that, when I shouldn't have and that is completely on me. I didn't intend to talk down to you, I was merely offering a perspective but I failed to phrase it in a respectful way. I'm glad you were able to respond to me respectfully as many people would go straight to insults were they in your situation and I thank you for it and again would like to apologize for my tone in my previous message.

Just wanted to give you props for this. So many people online, even here, will actually double down when called out instead of being introspective. You did just the opposite and it's refreshing to see maturity like this. Now, as you all were. :)