I'm kind of a morbid, dark person so my s/o wasn't alarmed or surprised when I tried to initiate the "let's discuss what we want done with our bodies when we die" conversation. The problem is though that he insisted that he won't die and I won't die either. He wholeheartedly believes that we'll have the technology to beat death within our lifetimes. He's utterly out of touch with the reality and inevitability of death and I'm worried how that's going to affect him when I finally ctb. I even asked him, "yes but what if something unforeseen were to happen to one of us before the technology exists?". He insisted we'd survive it. I just really don't know how to feel about it. I have no intention to back out of my plan, but I'm worried that it's gonna fuck with him more than I anticipated if he honestly believes this.
Rachel74
Enlightened
- Sep 7, 2019
- 1,716
Oh he has no plans to ctb, just me. I was only bringing up what we want done with our bodies portmortem as a way to get my desires communicated to someone before I pass, but we're engaged so he probably just thinks I brought it up for down the line. He has no idea I intend to die
BipolarExpat
Accomplished faker
- May 30, 2019
- 698
Can you imagine?
"Yay, we're immortal!"
"Errrr, how are we gonna' keep paying for comfort?"
Rachel74
Enlightened
- Sep 7, 2019
- 1,716
Got you now! I really need to start reading threads properly.
He and I have had a loooooot of talks about immortality, and he thinks it'd be great and wonderful and we'd never run out of universe to explore and things to discover and nobody would ever get bored of learning. I wish I could have even a portion of his optimism lol
BipolarExpat
Accomplished faker
- May 30, 2019
- 698
My goodness, me too. Well, if I could have that optimism without being manic, that is.
In all seriousness (I'm sure you realize) tho, an aging population that is already extending its stay is facing practically certain financial turmoil.
It just wasn't budgeted for and then you add on forced retirement schemes, effects of ageism and dwindling national economies that threaten pensions/securities, etc.
Could be a perfect storm of ensuring miserable (and extended) twilight years.
AngelOfDeath01
Member
- Oct 12, 2019
- 41
I get you. When I try to open up to my mother about my death to prepare her emotionally she starts saying that I will live a long life ( God forbid). She would always say that she has some kind of visions where we all live together happily. Sometimes I think it is just her way to manipulate me and make me believe in her illusions ( though I know she has good intentions). I think she will be at denial at first when I CTB but giving my circumstances I hope she will understand.
woxihuanni
Illuminated
- Aug 19, 2019
- 3,299
Honestly, if he seriously both believes immortality will be achieved (in his own lifetime, too!) and wants it... He has so much trouble with his mind that I don't know if there is even space for grief in there.
bigj75
“From Knowledge springs power."
- Sep 1, 2018
- 2,540
that's some absurd thinking. no way we will survive long enough for that.
trynacbt
Arcanist
- Sep 28, 2019
- 476
JTG1972
Set on my path, just need the strength
- Oct 2, 2019
- 51
I understand your situation. My wife has always been very optimistic and upbeat (until recently because of me) and I worry about how my ctbing will hit her. Especially hard because I have all my supplies now and write a version of my note I am happy with today and now I feel ready. I wasn't planning to this early but the urge has never been so strong, and she has no idea, and that's difficult.
There is a mortician on YouTube that has a hilarious channel that discusses death. It's honestly been something I've used to discuss death positivity without talking about ctbing. She has some really great tips, plus I've decided how my death will be put to good use as well. She is an advocate for death positivity and death with dignity stuff. I'm not sure how far with the death with dignity because she is based in the US. But I've made sure that I'm leaving some stuff to start those conversations and even started them with many people under the guise of humor with her videos.
I follow her channel too I love her. I read at least one of her books as well
Are you lost too?
Operator, well let's forget about this call
- Oct 18, 2019
- 361
Could you kindly share the link or her Chanel name ? Thanks!
I haven't read any of her books, are they long maybe I can get one, or I could buy one to have bedside for when I ctb.
Sure I just wasn't sure if it was allowed or not. The channel is called Ask a Mortician.
Are you lost too?
Operator, well let's forget about this call
- Oct 18, 2019
- 361
Not trying to seem insensitive, but I thought your SO believes very funny... in a nice way.
But I think he would see a psychologist. It's gonna be tough when he realizes it's not gonna happen.
May I ask, of course if you don't bother answering, if you do feel free to ignore it and no problem st all! But have/are you suffering from depression during this relationship? He seems very looking forward to the future and happy full of hopes !
Oh thank you so much! Gonna definitely check it out
I think it is allowed, I've seen people post musics on some topics (or wha it in the chats? Maybe). Anyway I don't think there would be any problem cause it's not a link to selling anything
Last edited:
The one I have by her is the one about working in a crematory and it wasn't too terribly long. Very interesting, I highly recommend it if you're interested in the funeral/death industry
I've suffered from depression for most of my life and I've always been on psych meds, which he knows about, but he also believes it can all be forced through with a positive mindset which kind of creates a bit of a rift between us. He's a good guy but I don't think he's always very realistic and he still has a lot to learn about the world
Are you lost too?
Operator, well let's forget about this call
- Oct 18, 2019
- 361
Oh I just check the channel.. loved her she is very charismatic, very upfront, video super informative and she is like an activist to change the whole "funeral" industry! So nice.
Let me wollow: oh I wish I was passionate about something like she is ... (note to self: gotta stop this!! But damn kind of addicted to it. I feel like a drama . Where did I left my crown l anyway. My god not even good enough for taking care of this fancy yet unimportant object)
Oh I see !
Yes, he definitely seems like a good guy.
But I know it's hard on the relationship when you have so different "views" of the world. Here he wave a saying: the reverses are attracted, but only the similars stick together. Not sure if my translation makes up to it but anyway I've tried
Last edited:
