The whole “you would’ve done it already” argument is so dumb

[Neogoloid]

So many people say that if you really want to die then you'd just do it. It's such a dumb argument. Many people start having suicidal thoughts years before they come close to actually doing it.

It takes some people more time than others and it is not always an easy process. Even the quickest and most painless methods can invoke some fear. Whether that be survival, or just fear of the end in general.

Everyone moves at their own pace, and many people haven't done it yet for their own reasons. Doesn't mean they won't ever do it.

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

Exactly.
Non - suicidal people have no idea of how difficult it is to find the right method and overcome survival instinct.
Suicide is the most difficult thing anyone could ever do, and you can only do it when you've reached an absolute breaking point, which may take years to finally reach.

 

[Darkover]

i would of done it by now if N was readily available in a shop near me it's my god given right to choose death at a time i decided

 

[ceriseange♡]

Exactly. Suicide isn't something you just do easily, be it physically, emotionally, or circumstantially. I feel like people don't realize that people don't just kill themselves because lol they wanna die, they're suffering.

 

[hermestrimegistus]

I think theres a difference between ideation and actual action but yeah this is a stupid belief. A lot of people dont understand SI and the power it has. But at the same time, I don't think it helps you or anyone else to tell others that you're suicidal. If you're not very close to them and can't trust them, I personally believe it to be a waste of time. Unless subconsciously deep down you just want them to try and save you. Which IMO is kind of a fucked up thing to do to someone. Especially if you care about them. I'd never want to put someone in that position

 

[Deleted member 65988]

People seriously underestimate SI. It is not an easy thing to overcome at all by any stretch no matter the method and the assurance of how peaceful and effective it can be. It's probably the hardest thing anyone can do and to think people say it's for losers or that it's for cowards, I beg to fucking differ.

 

[Lookoutbelow]

Exactly.
Non - suicidal people have no idea of how difficult it is to find the right method and overcome survival instinct.
Suicide is the most difficult thing anyone could ever do, and you can only do it when you've reached an absolute breaking point, which may take years to finally reach.

Yes.

 

[Cress]

Yeah I agree the argument that you would have done an already caters to them expecting you to do a more violent method. They don't really believe that though otherwise they wouldn't remove methods from you. I guarantee the person that said you would have done it already would not feel comfortable handing you a button that if pushed would immediately annihilate you. At some point The majority of them know that it is due to the Obstacles and difficulties that are put in your way.

One other thing I'll also add in this comes from Sam Harris but a lot of people repeat some things he says I think he has a lot of good ideas but this one in general not so much. Sam Harris would say to someone who claims " I can't deal with this suffering anymore" And Sam Harris's reply would be "You already are dealing with the suffering you're already in the moment".

Yeah I really don't agree with it it assumes that just because you can deal with something for a little while you can deal with it practically forever which is not really the way humans work. You can probably hold up a glass of water for an hour maybe several hours but as time progresses your arm is going to get progressively weak and you won't be able to continue holding up that weight forever. A lot of people like to come up with the justification that you can continue forever And I think it's tremendously misguided

 

[Aim]

People seriously underestimate SI. It is not an easy thing to overcome at all by any stretch no matter the method and the assurance of how peaceful and effective it can be. It's probably the hardest thing anyone can do and to think people say it's for losers or that it's for cowards, I beg to fucking differ.

Word to this!

 

[ABSOLUTION]

I don't understand how people so quickly jump to conclusions in their mind rather than actually listening and trying to understand when it comes to depression or suicide.
They think they know how it is, because no matter what I say they just compare it to the time they once felt like killing themselves by eating a box of paracetamol during a rough patch or something along those lines.
Ironically, attempting to reach out even to just get stuff off my mind has only made things worse. Because no one actually understands, it feels even more isolating.

 

[Aim]

So many people say that if you really want to die then you'd just do it. It's such a dumb argument. Many people start having suicidal thoughts years before they come close to actually doing it.

It takes some people more time than others and it is not always an easy process. Even the quickest and most painless methods can invoke some fear. Whether that be survival, or just fear of the end in general.

Everyone moves at their own pace, and many people haven't done it yet for their own reasons. Doesn't mean they won't ever do it.

These people has most likely never been given the ultimatum I believe. I think if they did they never would walk around saying those things. Its the ultimate bravery!

 

[アホペンギン]

Those who haven't struggled with suicidal ideation like we have, have no idea how hard it is to pull off ctb. I don't get their point from that statement either because they're so against the concept of suicide yet telling that to someone may be classified as encouragement. It's all stupid.

 

[DyingToDie123]

God I forgot about this argument and it just made me a whole new level of mad.
As someone who's experienced suicidal thoughts my whole life and tried to ctb, it's fucking hard.

Sorry, not an original contribution, just affirming you.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

Telling a suicidal person that if they were genuine they would have ended their lives straight away, instead of waiting, will only fuel their motivation to die even more. This is not what people who hold this attitude want, is it?

 

[Grave]

I had a nurse from the crisis team tell me this, made me want to do ctb even more just to prove to him that I did have the guts to do it

 

[FuneralCry]

The type of people who say things like that are insensitive non-suicidal people who think that suicide is as easy as just od on whatever accessible pills are available. Those people are best ignored, they are ignorant on how difficult it is to cease existing on our own terms. Sorry but suicide isn't as straightforward as just choosing to be gone with no risks involved, we exist in this society where suicide is cruelly made as inaccessible as possible. I despise how it's so difficult to die.