The Way Parents Talk About Thier Children Makes Me Sad

[Anonymoususer1234]

I see all kinds of posts on social media where parents complain about thier children having tantrums or crying or being "inconvenient" as if they somehow expected thier kids to come out the womb perfectly behaved.

Or posts where they laugh about how they never wanted kids and talk about how thier kids were accidents, as if pregnancy is something that "just happened" to them and not something that can be prevented (in most cases).

Just makes me sad. I wonder if these parents understand the damage they're doing by bringing an unwanted person into the world. I wonder if they care.

 

[Pluto]

Yes, it's not something to be so flippant about. I think everyone here would understand.

Another rant I've long held is that people who realise that having children wasn't the best choice are censored from sharing their warnings to others. Society conspires to push everyone into parenthood even though this sets up suffering at so many levels. Only people who genuinely respect this extreme level of responsibility should be going anywhere near children.

 

[Celerity]

Seeing my brother struggle to raise his children well really puts me off the idea of wanting to raise my own. I think that even with the best of intentions, it is really difficult to be a good parent and doubly so if you didn't have a good model of it growing up.

 

[Anonymoususer1234]

Seeing my brother struggle to raise his children well really puts me off the idea of wanting to raise my own. I think that even with the best of intentions, it is really difficult to be a good parent and doubly so if you didn't have a good model of it growing up.

100%. Parenthood is not easy and it's not for everyone ethier. Good intentions don't mean much if one doesn't have the right skills or knowledge. And yeah it's always sad to see parents who fail thier kids because they didn't have good parents growing up. I wish everyone did this kind of reflection before making such a big choice.

Yes, it's not something to be so flippant about. I think everyone here would understand.

Another rant I've long held is that people who realise that having children wasn't the best choice are censored from sharing their warnings to others. Society conspires to push everyone into parenthood even though this sets up suffering at so many levels. Only people who genuinely respect this extreme level of responsibility should be going anywhere near children.

Yes. Often parenthood is promoted as the right or selfless choice and this results in all kinds of harm. I wish our society was more willing to have open and honest discussions about these things.

Yes, it's not something to be so flippant about. I think everyone here would understand.

Another rant I've long held is that people who realise that having children wasn't the best choice are censored from sharing their warnings to others. Society conspires to push everyone into parenthood even though this sets up suffering at so many levels. Only people who genuinely respect this extreme level of responsibility should be going anywhere near children.

Yes. Often parenthood is promoted as the right or selfless choice and this results in all kinds of harm. I wish our society was more willing to have open and honest discussions about these things.

 

[Csmith8827]

You're right 1,000,000%.

Like it's pretty unheard of...

 

[Daxter_87]

To me all parents are criminals. They have no right whatsoever to complain about how their children turn out, since they are the ones who decided to procreate. They were either oblivious to the possibility that anything could happen to their offspring, or they were aware of this fact, yet they chose to roll the dice anyway (for whatever selfish reasons).

Besides, I personally believe that children have no obligations of any kind towards their parents. They don't have to behave like their parents want them to, and they certainly don't have to feel guilty for "disappointing" them (for not doing what the parents desire).

Of course, this is always easier said than done, as we have been deeply programmed by our parents precisely to do the aforesaid things. I too find it hard to break free from such powerful (yet invisible) ties; I am attached to my parents, but I know the love I feel for them stems from the strong conditioning ingrained in the depths of my mind.