s00ngone
All you can feel is the weather
- Mar 21, 2025
- 31
Waking up is the hardest part of every day. It could be much, much worse - I get a full 8-10 hours of rest every night, my parents don't throw open my door and yank the blanket off me or anything.
It's just the responsibility to be that comes with being awake. When I fall asleep for the night, even with the unfathomable horror of what goes through my mind these days, I can pretend or avoid or even hope that I don't wake up. Waking is the condemnation to freedom. I could make something of my life, and in my sheer numbness, I know I won't. Can't? Who knows.
I know one my payment processes, the SN will truly be on its way. It makes me panic but also calms me to know. I've never been more ashamed, more... gone.
It's just the responsibility to be that comes with being awake. When I fall asleep for the night, even with the unfathomable horror of what goes through my mind these days, I can pretend or avoid or even hope that I don't wake up. Waking is the condemnation to freedom. I could make something of my life, and in my sheer numbness, I know I won't. Can't? Who knows.
I know one my payment processes, the SN will truly be on its way. It makes me panic but also calms me to know. I've never been more ashamed, more... gone.
