disconnection
It's the blue hour again
- Apr 24, 2020
- 312
So this is a huge part of the reason I want to CTB. I became homeless after an admission to a mental health unit, had broken up with my long term partner just before. Discharged to a hostel awaiting supported housing. Family thankfully stepped in so I didn't go. There was a vague chance I'd be able to return to work at that point but it didn't happen, too much time off sick and too unpredictable. If I hadn't come here I'd have been put in supported housing and have had to give up my job. Because that's the system. Where you can't work over 16 hours or the rent becomes unaffordable from benefits.
Now prior to last year I'd been studying full time for a year, then working full time for some 8 years, with no huge issues. Life crashed down and suddenly the system wanted to disincentivise me to actually get better? If I'm living somewhere I couldn't afford if I was working then how the hell am I supposed to find a job and move on? Without a job, how do I get another place privately? Getting PIP (disability benefit) is ridiculous, you have to be basically unable to do anything for yourself and its reviewed frequently so even if you do get it and can just about afford to live week to week then you're constantly in fear of it being taken away. That's exactly what happened to someone I knew who later killed himself. I knew earlier this year that I'd be following suit - I didn't actually expect it to take as long as it has. Without PIP you're left on £94 a week (was £74 before corona) unless you get the severe disability premium which is as difficult to get as PIP.
What the actual hell? How can it be so easy to fall into a poverty trap and so incredibly hard to dig your way out? Given the state of the world and the lack of enjoyment I tend to get anyway from living at the best of times, I'm not going to attempt recovery this time (did manage it just over a decade ago, hence the recent functionality) but my mental health has been steadily declining too even before I hit crisis point. But if I did want to I don't see how I'd be able to whatsoever if I wasn't able to lean on family for a bit? Policy makers come and talk to me!!!
Now prior to last year I'd been studying full time for a year, then working full time for some 8 years, with no huge issues. Life crashed down and suddenly the system wanted to disincentivise me to actually get better? If I'm living somewhere I couldn't afford if I was working then how the hell am I supposed to find a job and move on? Without a job, how do I get another place privately? Getting PIP (disability benefit) is ridiculous, you have to be basically unable to do anything for yourself and its reviewed frequently so even if you do get it and can just about afford to live week to week then you're constantly in fear of it being taken away. That's exactly what happened to someone I knew who later killed himself. I knew earlier this year that I'd be following suit - I didn't actually expect it to take as long as it has. Without PIP you're left on £94 a week (was £74 before corona) unless you get the severe disability premium which is as difficult to get as PIP.
What the actual hell? How can it be so easy to fall into a poverty trap and so incredibly hard to dig your way out? Given the state of the world and the lack of enjoyment I tend to get anyway from living at the best of times, I'm not going to attempt recovery this time (did manage it just over a decade ago, hence the recent functionality) but my mental health has been steadily declining too even before I hit crisis point. But if I did want to I don't see how I'd be able to whatsoever if I wasn't able to lean on family for a bit? Policy makers come and talk to me!!!
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