The same people who say "go see a therapist" have no idea how inaccessible therapy is

[FireFox]

I hate how people whether it is on social media or real life tell other people to go "see a therapist." Therapy is extremely difficult to acess. The mental health care system is inaccessible to the general public this is a problem worldwide which needs to be addressed otherwise more people are going to die

In the UK where I live the NHS has very long waiting lists for mental health treatment even getting on the list is difficult in itself. Mental health care here is a postcode lottery -where an individual lives in the UK will determine how long they will wait for treatment. The NHS now has backlog of cases because during the pandemic the NHS cancelled its services now people from 2020/21 are waiting to catch up on their cancellaed treatments and procedures.

Going private for treatment is very expensive especially in the city i live in. In USA Americans struggle to afford health insurance and world wide mentally ill people struggle to get treatment because of their inaccessible healthcare systems.

If going to see a therapist was so easy we would all be doing it.

 

[Spiritual survivor]

Agree. If it was easy, practical, accessible, and affordable I would have been in therapy by now. I remember thinking when I was a young lady, that we were in this very advanced civilized society. I mean they told us we have built a spaceship and landed on the moon for fcksakes Little did we know, it was all a lie. If there was ever any enlightenment, it's going back to medieval in a hurry.

 

[FireFox]

Agree. If it was easy, practical, accessible, and affordable I would have been in therapy by now. I remember thinking when I was a young lady, that we were in this very advanced civilized society. I mean they told us we have built a spaceship and landed on the moon for fcksakes Little did we know, it was all a lie. If there was ever any enlightenment, it's going back to medieval in a hurry.

@Failedlife I really think we as a society we should all get together to make an app. This app will give information on where people can find affordable low cost doctrors, therapists or support groups and organisations for their mental health problems in the local areas they live in.

 

[ManicNarcissus]

i called a local behavioral med center and asked for a therapist for bipolar spells, they told me the earliest appointment for new patients was in 6 months. i'd been at my lowest for going on 24 months at that point

 

[conejo triste]

It's incredibly sad how small minded those people are. Just yesterday someone told me if I was determined enough to get help nothing will stop me from getting it, despite the social and psychological limitations. As you stated, if help was more accessible I have no doubt the many of us would seek it but unfortunately life isn't fair.

 

[Unattainable666]

So true. If you do find a therapist they tend to be crazier and needing therapy more than I do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Never again.

 

[FireFox]

So true. If you do find a therapist they tend to be crazier and needing therapy more than I do!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Never again.

@Unattainable666 Oh my God I am sorry you went through that. Actually in the past I have heard of law cases of where therapists and psychiatrists have buiiled and abused patients under their care. I always thought it was a minority of cases. We were always told as a society that therpaists are nice people who want to help.

I love your profile picture Starry night is my favourite Vincent Van Gogh art work. I even have a Starry Night tin. My city had a digtal art exhibition called the Vincent Van Gogh immersive experience which uses VR, 360 projection to bring to life his art work. I saw Starry Night in VR it was so cool. You have brilliant taste.

 

[Unattainable666]

@Unattainable666 Oh my God I am sorry you went through that. Actually in the past I have heard of law cases of where therapists and psychiatrists have buiiled and abused patients under their care. I always thought it was a minority of cases. We were always told as a society that therpaists are nice people who want to help.

I love your profile picture Starry night is my favourite Vincent Van Gogh art work. I even have a Starry Night tin. My city had a digtal art exhibition called the Vincent Van Gogh immersive experience which uses VR, 360 projection to bring to life his art work. I saw Starry Night in VR it was so cool. You have brilliant taste.

Great minds think alike!

 

[FireFox]

i called a local behavioral med center and asked for a therapist for bipolar spells, they told me the earliest appointment for new patients was in 6 months. i'd been at my lowest for going on 24 months at that point

@ManicNarcissus Virtual hug what country is that ?

In the UK where I live there is a lot of mental health awareness campaigns about mild to moderate depression, anxiety and eating disorders but when it comes to bipolar, schizophrenia and more severe mental illness people have complained that there is not much help and support in our healthcare system for those at the severe end.

 

[prezmyl]

In my country it is also hard to get into therapy and sure even harder if you want to try some more modern approach than all those classical ones. I spent 10 years in classic therapies with no real outcome. Classic therapies did not work for me very well, but for some others might.

 

[neonzebra]

This is also my experience.
With the NHS I had a 6 week courses of low level CBT and two 6 week courses of counselling. Both were mostly ineffective. I literally don't even know how to get access to the high intensity therapy. My cousin who has been severely mentally ill for decades has only just started having proper NHS psychotherapy so I guess I have to wait a while and possibly make some self harm attempts before I will get proper therapy.
I also paid out of my nose for private counselling a few years ago. I must have spent upwards of £1200 because everyone says therapy is the best thing everrrr. Nope. I feel the same way if not worse. If I was a millionaire maybe I'd have the time and money to search and search for a good counsellor but I won't be spending my money on it ever again.

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

If going to see a therapist was so easy we would all be doing it

i dunno about that. i had an mri taken of my knee and two 'specialists' tugging at my legs. the knee is not a very complex area but somehow they both came to the conclusion that my other knee was an issue. now the brain is so much more complex. are you going to trust someone that read a few books?

 

[ManicNarcissus]

@ManicNarcissus Virtual hug what country is that ?

In the UK where I live there is a lot of mental health awareness campaigns about mild to moderate depression, anxiety and eating disorders but when it comes to bipolar, schizophrenia and more severe mental illness people have complained that there is not much help and support in our healthcare system for those at the severe end.

In the US.

Theres a lot of the same going on here with campaigns but nothing really resulting in anything worthwhile.

When i'd first gone through the system almost 10 years ago they thought i just had depression and anxiety, they were throwing meds and "treatment plans" at me like there was no end to their supply. Once i got the bipolar diagnosis and went to behavioral health they said "so, what do you want us to do for it?" as if i was the one that studied pharmacology.

Its very much been a "you're on your own here" but this site has helped tremendously.

 

[UKscotty]

Even if you get into therapy it's a waste of time anyway.

 

[FireFox]

This is also my experience.
With the NHS I had a 6 week courses of low level CBT and two 6 week courses of counselling. Both were mostly ineffective. I literally don't even know how to get access to the high intensity therapy. My cousin who has been severely mentally ill for decades has only just started having proper NHS psychotherapy so I guess I have to wait a while and possibly make some self harm attempts before I will get proper therapy.
I also paid out of my nose for private counselling a few years ago. I must have spent upwards of £1200 because everyone says therapy is the best thing everrrr. Nope. I feel the same way if not worse. If I was a millionaire maybe I'd have the time and money to search and search for a good counsellor but I won't be spending my money on it ever again.

@neonzebra The problem with the UK is we have all these celebrities and influencers going on TV, making BBC, ITV News documentaries or writing glossy magazine or newspaper columns about how therapy helped them and how we all need to go therapy and the importance of reaching out. It is like mental health has become a big business enterprise.

I would have more respect for these celebrities if they raised awareness of that the general public can not access therapy as the NHS is inaccessible when it comes to mental health treatment. People are literally dying waiting.

The therapy made you worse I am sorry to hear that.

 

[lachrymost]

And if it didn't work for you, they might say you just haven't found "the right therapist." Yeah, I'll start working my way through the procession of therapists eager to take me on at an affordable rate until I find that special someone!

You are also expected to do it for months and months with the same person before you can complain that it didn't help. And it's not like it's all that anyway. It isn't magic. You're literally just talking to someone. People are so weird about therapy.

 

[BlazingBob]

I can't afford it

 

[FireFox]

Even if you get into therapy it's a waste of time anyway.

@UKscotty Really I have never had therapy actaully so always wondered what would have been if I did go down therapy route.

I have tried to access therapy on the NHS at 21 when my depression started and was unsuccessful because NHS bureaucracy issues in my area. I am very unlucky because my NHS trust in my area provides not only services to people living in the Borough I live in but also multiple neighbouring boroughs. The service is enormous, overstreched and getting help is uphill struggle. This is the postcode lottery we need to talking about. In the end I gave up.

I talk to people online I am a very passionate and authentic about feelings and how I see the world. I wish I didn't see the world the way I do or have these feelings. Even in online support spaces for women I have had women type "go see a therapist" and criticise me for my posts. These women are so unwilling to help me with whatever problems I am actaully having in my life nor care enough.

I can't afford it

@BlazingBob See this is a serious issue people are having all around the world but nobody wants to discuss this seriously.

I really think we as a society we should all get together to make an app. This app will give information on where people can find affordable low cost doctrors, therapists or support groups and charity organisations for their mental health problems in the local areas they live in. It would make a massive difference in peoples lives.

Everyone wants to virtual signal " go see a therapist" but nobody wants to suggest nor help ideas on how to actually deal with this problem.

And if it didn't work for you, they might say you just haven't found "the right therapist." Yeah, I'll start working my way through the procession of therapists eager to take me on at an affordable rate until I find that special someone!

You are also expected to do it for months and months with the same person before you can complain that it didn't help. And it's not like it's all that anyway. It isn't magic. You're literally just talking to someone. People are so weird about therapy.

@lachrymost The way people talk about therapy they are behaving as if Jesus cured them.

In the US.

Theres a lot of the same going on here with campaigns but nothing really resulting in anything worthwhile.

When i'd first gone through the system almost 10 years ago they thought i just had depression and anxiety, they were throwing meds and "treatment plans" at me like there was no end to their supply. Once i got the bipolar diagnosis and went to behavioral health they said "so, what do you want us to do for it?" as if i was the one that studied pharmacology.

Its very much been a "you're on your own here" but this site has helped tremendously.

@ManicNarcissus Bipolar is one most cruel illnesses ever. It is shocking how in 2023 despite advances in technology and mordern medicine we still have very ignorant attitudes about bipolar. Then we have arseholes like Kayne West fueling negatives stereotypes about bipolar people.

In 2018 Kanye West even in a wrote an rap song calling his bipolar disorder a "superpower"

One day we will hear the news Kanye West has killed himself because that is where he is heading he has no treatment and has friends who just care about his money. The same world that was laughing at him and his public breakdowns will be tweeting #RIPKanye, reach out for help etc

I wish you well sorry about your bipolar diagnosis.

 

[FireFox]

It's incredibly sad how small minded those people are. Just yesterday someone told me if I was determined enough to get help nothing will stop me from getting it, despite the social and psychological limitations. As you stated, if help was more accessible I have no doubt the many of us would seek it but unfortunately life isn't fair.

@conejo triste I experienced similar recently from someone as well I feel you on that one.

I got fired earlier this year from a very toxic workplace where so much went wrong. I was 25 at the time and I hate myself for my naivety and trusting nature because my older workplace colleagues took advantage of it and ended up humiliating me so badly. My boss cruelly mocked my immaturity. My confidence has been damaged as result. It was my first full time job since graduating university.

I have been sharing my experiences in online spaces because I can't talk about it publicly my family are embrassed thier perfect daughter got fired. One moderator in a discord group she was mega super arsehole and responsed "stop writing novel long pages" and "go see a therapist". I wrote 2-3 shorts paragraphs then shamed me infront of the community yes. This woman has no life of her own she lives her life on moderating reddit and discord server talks about the meals she having at restaurants, her weekend at home or how loves karaoke.

In my country it is also hard to get into therapy and sure even harder if you want to try some more modern approach than all those classical ones. I spent 10 years in classic therapies with no real outcome. Classic therapies did not work for me very well, but for some others might.

@prezmyl Suicide is ultimately a symptom of a broken world. The true poison and sickness is the inhumanity of society.

we can not have world without suicide because some mental health illnesses are extremely difficult to live with such as bipolar and schizophrenia however if we did have a better world and society sucide won't be as common.

They are plenty of social and economic problems that led people to kill themselves. If people and society spent more time trying to address those rather than telling people to "go see a therapist"

 

[SadPingu]

I have bipolar 2 and it sucks. It's not a super power and the hypomania isn't worth it for the depression. I've been depressed for months now. Back and forth to the NHS. I can't fault my GP. They finally got me seen by the CMHT on the NHS. Spoke to a psych for about 10 mins who offered a treatment I was hesitant about and when I suggested and alternative they refused to agree to it. Paid to go private (I'm fortunate in that sense). Psych spent an hour with me went through all the various options and agreed my suggestion was suitable. The system is rigged in favour of those who can pay. Dunno how much the new meds will help but want to say I tried all I could before CTB.

 

[passivethought121]

I feel like people who say "get therapy" are saying that as an escape. They think that by saying that, they've done everything they needed to and they've lifted the responsibility (that they put on themselves) to help us. It's like the many other excuses people will say to physically get out of something. "I have to take a call.", or "I have work", or something else. While those are real, they're probably less focused on that and more relieved that they could run away.

 

[FireFox]

I have bipolar 2 and it sucks. It's not a super power and the hypomania isn't worth it for the depression. I've been depressed for months now. Back and forth to the NHS. I can't fault my GP. They finally got me seen by the CMHT on the NHS. Spoke to a psych for about 10 mins who offered a treatment I was hesitant about and when I suggested and alternative they refused to agree to it. Paid to go private (I'm fortunate in that sense). Psych spent an hour with me went through all the various options and agreed my suggestion was suitable. The system is rigged in favour of those who can pay. Dunno how much the new meds will help but want to say I tried all I could before CTB.

@SadPingu When Kayne West released the album it caused major controversy bipolar sufferers were furious when he described bipolar a "superpower" then there was even others even defending Kanye west.

This bipolar artist was defending Kanye West and gave his perspective on the issue. He suffers from Bipolar 2

https://djbooth.net/features/2018-06-04-kanye-west-bipolar-disorder-superpower

I am not bipolar but I found it a very interesting debate from listening from bipolar sufferers giving thier perspective on the issue.

healthcare is a human right. Everyone deserves access to good quality healthcare regardless of income. A civilised society takes care of the sick if a society cannot do that then its neither civilised nor moral.

 

[FireFox]

I feel like people who say "get therapy" are saying that as an escape. They think that by saying that, they've done everything they needed to and they've lifted the responsibility (that they put on themselves) to help us. It's like the many other excuses people will say to physically get out of something. "I have to take a call.", or "I have work", or something else. While those are real, they're probably less focused on that and more relieved that they could run away.

@passivethought121 Yeah actually that is an interesting point you make actually because the same people who tell you to see a therapist will not even signpost you nor direct you on how to access therapy services in your local area, a name a low cost doctor or place or platform that offers affordable therapy for those who cant afford it. These people don't even know how accessing therapy is very hard and not that easy.

Everyone wants to feel like they are doing something short term but nobody cares enough.

 

[Duality]

I agree, and not only is it inaccessible, even when you do see one they always say something along the lines of "If you are a danger to yourself and/or to others, I will have to call the cops." Right, isn't me wanting to kill myself the reason I am seeing you? So why should I bother if me talking about my suicidality might result in an unwanted stay at a hospital?

Unbelievable. I can never tell a therapist 100% about what and why I feel due to that always being in the back of my mind. Instead, I've learned to not open up to anyone in real life but rather clam everything up inside. Funnily enough, this has actually given me a lot of time to reflect on the what and why so I don't need therapy anymore, but it sure would have been great if therapy was a valid option when I was younger.

 

[untothedepths]

The cost and the risk of me actually pushing me closer to the brink is what keeps me from going, but to be frank, it's mostly the cost.

 

[FireFox]

I agree, and not only is it inaccessible, even when you do see one they always say something along the lines of "If you are a danger to yourself and/or to others, I will have to call the cops." Right, isn't me wanting to kill myself the reason I am seeing you? So why should I bother if me talking about my suicidality might result in an unwanted stay at a hospital?

Unbelievable. I can never tell a therapist 100% about what and why I feel due to that always being in the back of my mind. Instead, I've learned to not open up to anyone in real life but rather clam everything up inside. Funnily enough, this has actually given me a lot of time to reflect on the what and why so I don't need therapy anymore, but it sure would have been great if therapy was a valid option when I was younger.

@Duality Phoning the police makes it even worse. In my city this year the police commissioner has announced the police will no longer attend emergency calls related to mental health incidents and the policy comes into effect August 31.The commissioner introduced this policy because he says the police are not qualified to do with mental health issues and attending mental health related incidents take away time in dealing with the crime.

Before the commissioner introduced the policy this year the police force in my city came under controversy because the police tasered a mentally ill man after attending a mental health related 999 call. The incident caused public outrage and opened up discussion in the UK about how the police cause more distress to mentally ill people during when they attend these emergency service call related to mental health. Mental health in the city will now be matter for the ambulance service and the NHS hospitals to deal with.

 

[inpursuitofpeace]

@Duality Phoning the police makes it even worse. In my city this year the police commissioner has announced the police will no longer attend emergency calls related to mental health incidents and the policy comes into effect August 31.The commissioner introduced this policy because he says the police are not qualified to do with mental health issues and attending mental health related incidents take away time in dealing with the crime.

Before the commissioner introduced the policy this year the police force in my city came under controversy because the police tasered a mentally ill man after attending a mental health related 999 call. The incident caused public outrage and opened up discussion in the UK about how the police cause more distress to mentally ill people during when they attend these emergency service call related to mental health. Mental health in the city will now be matter for the ambulance service and the NHS hospitals to deal with.

I have always found it bizarre that in a suicide attempt, the police arrive before the paramedics, if the paramedics show up at all. I've heard it's to ensure that the "scene is safe" for paramedics, but ultimately, police aren't trained well in mental health issues, and sometimes it results in more trauma or injury. I also wish that IF the police showed up and a person absolutely needed to be restrained (which is less common but depends on the circumstances), that they would use hospital restraints rather than handcuffs.

I agree, and not only is it inaccessible, even when you do see one they always say something along the lines of "If you are a danger to yourself and/or to others, I will have to call the cops." Right, isn't me wanting to kill myself the reason I am seeing you? So why should I bother if me talking about my suicidality might result in an unwanted stay at a hospital?

Unbelievable. I can never tell a therapist 100% about what and why I feel due to that always being in the back of my mind. Instead, I've learned to not open up to anyone in real life but rather clam everything up inside. Funnily enough, this has actually given me a lot of time to reflect on the what and why so I don't need therapy anymore, but it sure would have been great if therapy was a valid option when I was younger.

I had that fear for a long time, too. I used to hide the truth because I was so afraid that people would immediately send me to a hospital, however, I've seen handfuls of therapists over the years, and only one was overly concerned/pro-actively recommending hospitalizations if I tell them that I'm suicidal. The rest have been completely okay with me mentioning that I'm suicidal, especially if it's passive. Even when it's active, they've been okay with me making the decision if and when I need to go to the hospital (if at all). We basically talk about it, they ask how they can support me, and ask if I need to go to the hospital (pre-attempt), I say no (and they have never involuntarily committed me), and continue plugging along. I understand that not everyone has this experience, but I hope it gives you a little bit of hope that maybe you'll eventually find someone who can handle chronic suicidality and not overreact, should you choose to try therapy again, provided that you have access.

 

[Duality]

I had that fear for a long time, too. I used to hide the truth because I was so afraid that people would immediately send me to a hospital, however, I've seen handfuls of therapists over the years, and only one was overly concerned/pro-actively recommending hospitalizations if I tell them that I'm suicidal. The rest have been completely okay with me mentioning that I'm suicidal, especially if it's passive. Even when it's active, they've been okay with me making the decision if and when I need to go to the hospital (if at all). We basically talk about it, they ask how they can support me, and ask if I need to go to the hospital (pre-attempt), I say no (and they have never involuntarily committed me), and continue plugging along. I understand that not everyone has this experience, but I hope it gives you a little bit of hope that maybe you'll eventually find someone who can handle chronic suicidality and not overreact, should you choose to try therapy again, provided that you have access.

I'm happy that you were able to find therapists who were able to listen to you. I guess I wasn't so lucky, especially with the therapists in my immediate area. I'm all right with not going to therapy now, I've already made my peace. It's just unfortunate it took so long. Plus, regardless of how I feel about myself, I ultimately view suicide as a choice that should be explored freely and not necessarily something that should be prevented.

Anyway, I also hope others are able to find someone to talk to who won't overreact.

 

[venin]

& how hard it is to find the right therapist and therapy.

& the fact that for some people it might not be as efficient as they want it to be in a reasonable period of time. (while they're dying on the inside every second)

I'm still pro-therapy but people see it way too simplistic.

 

[UKscotty]

I can yell you what therapy will do..
1. Tell you to get outside and put more effort in
2. Write down your feelings before the next session
3. Think of ways you can be more productive

Waste of time