Z

zadig777

naive fool
Sep 18, 2018
180
hello all
i just were thinking about this problem here
i had great life,but got it destroyed over night
now i know that i will not enjoy pleasures in life due to chemical problems developed in my brain
all my life i were happy to be alive and were living life with full force,had struggles but also had motivation to get reed of them
now i dont see a motive of doing anything at all,since i cant experience pleasure and all that

now to the point
i dont want to die
i want to have the life i had,but unfortunately that is impossible and never will be
i want a better sollution,better than this,but with suicide you get nor better nor worse
u are out of it all
my motive always were to strive for better,but now i cant actually do that even if i want to
due to this philosophy of mine,im starting to fantasize that when i ctb,i recreate in another universe the same me-but the old me
i know thats imposible also now
i also think about reincarnation
i rly dont wanna be no one else except the old me
thinking about this matter rly makes me feel like shit,but so does looking at reality
i think that the most probable thing will be that after few years,when im rly deep into the shithole and tired of all the shit i will cbt and not think about this,but atm im still expecting and hoping that i will go back to normal,when realisticly i wont

do you think that the suicide is the right path towards improvement when u cant improve anymore in this body and in this reality?
or do you think that objectivly the point of suicide is something other than that?

im looking forward to hearing some of ur opinions and thoughts regarding this matter

regards
 
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S

Shay

Experienced
Aug 31, 2018
277
hello all
i just were thinking about this problem here
i had great life,but got it destroyed over night
now i know that i will not enjoy pleasures in life due to chemical problems developed in my brain
all my life i were happy to be alive and were living life with full force,had struggles but also had motivation to get reed of them
now i dont see a motive of doing anything at all,since i cant experience pleasure and all that

now to the point
i dont want to die
i want to have the life i had,but unfortunately that is impossible and never will be
i want a better sollution,better than this,but with suicide you get nor better nor worse
u are out of it all
my motive always were to strive for better,but now i cant actually do that even if i want to
due to this philosophy of mine,im starting to fantasize that when i ctb,i recreate in another universe the same me-but the old me
i know thats imposible also now
i also think about reincarnation
i rly dont wanna be no one else except the old me
thinking about this matter rly makes me feel like shit,but so does looking at reality
i think that the most probable thing will be that after few years,when im rly deep into the shithole and tired of all the shit i will cbt and not think about this,but atm im still expecting and hoping that i will go back to normal,when realisticly i wont

do you think that the suicide is the right path towards improvement when u cant improve anymore in this body and in this reality?
or do you think that objectivly the point of suicide is something other than that?

im looking forward to hearing some of ur opinions and thoughts regarding this matter

regards
I'm in the same situation. I want my old self back that was robbed from me and can't let go of it. I know I'll never have that self again and it is causing me so much pain. But someone told me that I can't travel back in time and it's not doing me any good to think about the past. Except it's hard and I'm recording all the times I am thinking of the past. I'm up to 65 thoughts just 3 and a half hours later. I want to CTB too bc I'll never have it but I've also agree to do CBT while I am getting ready to see if maybe I can come to accept the reality. Although I don't think I can