Discussion The only person i thought to be my friend is faking it (+small vent)

[Asprex]

As the title says, a girl i know and i know since last year has been texting me for a while now. I reply because im not that kind of person. Yet when we see each other at school etc she acts as if we total strangers. As if she doesn't want to show that we are "friends" . I really hate that and I'm going to confront her about it. She never approaches me first or never starts a conversation. She knows about my condition and she probably has decided to keep texting with me saying all that stuff like "why don't you go outside?" "Why don't you hang out with your friends" and when i say that i don't have any she says that she's my friend. And that's it she doesn't even ask if I want to go out with her to do anything. And whenever i tried asking first she always turned it down. Im not gonna be a simp for a friend that's way too much. Im confronting her about and cutting ties with her even online.

Some backstory if you want to read: we used to hang out last year and i ended up getting into a "relationship" with her but it was so one-sided. She never did anything and she ended up dumping me as well. She knew about everything. Now this year she approached me and i thought she'd want to be friends and it's nice to at least have one friend but no she ain't gonna do this. Omfg she is so annoying.

 

[Actually]

Do you have updates? +hope it all went well with cutting her off

 

[Asprex]

Do you have updates? +hope it all went well with cutting her off

Yes actually she sent me again after 2 weeks. Help me im so stuck but I don't feel as bad. I treat her badly. Talk rudely to her. Idk anymore. How did you find the post after such a long time?

 

[Mirrory Me]

What if she's just shy / introverted and doesn't dare to talk to you in public? There is no reason to send messages to someone unless there is actually some kind of interest.

 

[Asprex]

What if she's just shy / introverted and doesn't dare to talk to you in public? There is no reason to send messages to someone unless there is actually some kind of interest.

I don't know it seems way too weird. Because she talks with everyone else but me. That's my problem. Like today we didn't exchange a single word at school it's so annoying. Anyways I won't consider her a friend. Problem solved i guess. She's not the shy kind of person. She's just way too entitled and probably expects everyone to approach her first.

 

[notwhereIbelong]

I suggest confronting her directly (through text, of course), asking what her intentions are and why she ignores you irl. It could be anything, but unless she's willing to change something about your relationship, you should really minimize how much you get fixated on her. I know it's hard, I've had (and have) people that I fixate on, it's hard to move on, even when they're bad for you. If you don't feel like cutting her off completely, do still try to distance yourself a bit, so don't be too open about your mental health and avoid being passive aggressive. I'm not going to say 'grey rock her' but.. it's kinda similar. Most importantly, as said above, if you have any interest in your relationship with her, confront her and demand an explanation

 

[Asprex]

I suggest confronting her directly (through text, of course), asking what her intentions are and why she ignores you irl. It could be anything, but unless she's willing to change something about your relationship, you should really minimize how much you get fixated on her. I know it's hard, I've had (and have) people that I fixate on, it's hard to move on, even when they're bad for you. If you don't feel like cutting her off completely, do still try to distance yourself a bit, so don't be too open about your mental health and avoid being passive aggressive. I'm not going to say 'grey rock her' but.. it's kinda similar. Most importantly, as said above, if you have any interest in your relationship with her, confront her and demand an explanation

I think the only thing i can really do is cut her off slowly. I'm gonna try doing that without mentioning my mental health state. Jeez something so small yet so annoying.

 

[Valky]

What I can tell you from experience is that (obviously) most people act different than they do online. Some more and some less.

Therefore, maybe she doesn't know how to approach you or is scared that you feel pressured by here. Do you get what I mean?
Like maybe she just doesn't know how to deal with this outside of texting you.