iori
Member
- May 19, 2023
- 8
i dont know why its happening again at all. im not like i used to be anymore, im happier, im not trapped by one person and i made friends and reconnected with old friends, im back in school and i have a job. im supposed to be way happier but i dont still feel alot of emotions?? i hate this feeling alot!! its really the worse, it feels like my body is completely hollow. i cant do anything to hurt or feel something at all, i cant prove to myself that im a human or even something at all. my dissociation episodes are getting increasingly frequent and longer, my eating disorders and body dysmorphias getting worse, i cant really talk to anyone about it because my therapist dropped me. thats how good i was doing!! ive been going to mental health professionals for 5 years and i didnt need it anymore. i was real happy. i always feel kinda silly posting here cuz my thoughts are real scattered. ill probably go to the pharmacy today to get razor blades or something, it sucks feeling nothing, i choose pain over this
