The choice is out of my hands now

[BlackWednesday]

I work full time and try not to spend a lot of money. Despite this I'm losing money every month just on supporting myself. Soon I will simply be unable to afford to live.

I have tried applying for other jobs but simply get no reponse. Even if I didn't want to kill myself what else could I do?

 

[jodes2]

Sorry to hear that. I guess all you can do is keep applying for more jobs and try and keep expenses down. Heating is often one of the biggest expenses so if you can keep that down it'll really help. See if there's any financial aid you can get from the government. You might want to try moving to a cheaper apartment

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds like a really awful situation to be in, there could certainly never be anything fair about existing here in this hellish world and that is the reality.

 

[Sovereign]

I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling. It can be challenging to stay afloat when money is tight. One piece of advice that could be helpful is to create a budget and track your spending. This can help you identify areas where you can cut back on expenses and find ways to save money. Additionally, you may want to consider reaching out to community resources for support, such as food banks or financial assistance programs. Remember that you're not alone, and there are resources available to help you through this difficult time. Don't give up!

 

[BlackWednesday]

I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling. It can be challenging to stay afloat when money is tight. One piece of advice that could be helpful is to create a budget and track your spending. This can help you identify areas where you can cut back on expenses and find ways to save money. Additionally, you may want to consider reaching out to community resources for support, such as food banks or financial assistance programs. Remember that you're not alone, and there are resources available to help you through this difficult time. Don't give up!

No to be blunt. But I wasn't really asking for cookie cutter advice

 

[Sovereign]

No to be blunt. But I wasn't really asking for cookie cutter advice

Outside of giving general advice on how to get your life back on track, there's hardly any way for me to give advice... In any case I do hope that, in life or in death, your future will find you well.

 

[Mthom2]

This isn't suitable for everyone, but I've stumbled onto "van/vehicle living" after I had to get out of a terrible living situation recently. I'm currently buying a little at a time to get my suv fit to my needs. Do a search for van living online. There are also tons of you tube videos about it.

I'm still suicidal, and always will be, but this has placed the ultimate decision back into my hands. I was at the point of my living situation forcing me into cbt , which isn't a good thing. That decision should always be your choice without outside force.

Hopefully this will help you out a bit, like it has me. Now, I'll have my ctb method ready for the proper time, AND affordable living accommodations. It's definitely something to think about.

 

[ShatteredQueen]

I work full time and try not to spend a lot of money. Despite this I'm losing money every month just on supporting myself. Soon I will simply be unable to afford to live.

I have tried applying for other jobs but simply get no reponse. Even if I didn't want to kill myself what else could I do?

I understand what you mean. Nothing we do is ever good enough, is it? No matter how hard we try, life only slaps us down again. Wages are stagnating again and living expenses keep going up. It makes you want to scream. I know because I am there with you. You are not alone.

My situation may be somewhat different but I can empathize. I did everything "right"... I graduated college with a BA, struggled to find professional positions, settled for call center bull shit jobs out of desperation, set up a savings plan, and lost everything I saved to my ex, (pro-tip: NEVER agree to joint accounts.) I finally got a "real job," although I had to accept pittance wages to do it, and then I got screwed over because I was forced to be a "contractor" but not really. I didn't get to set my hours or rates, but management got to play with my hours as much as they liked. I had to pay my own taxes (at least twenty percent of earnings no matter how little I earned,) and I was not eligible for overtime so WOW did they ever love working me long hours! (Except for when they gave me almost no hours as a sort of punishment for saying I couldn't work all the hours they wanted.) So I returned to grad school thinking that would help, struggled to get all A's in my courses, and have just been informed that I may be kicked out anyway because some brainless office hen lost part of my paperwork. I did everything I was supposed to, but I'm still be punished simply for living.

I'm not saying all of this to complain but because I want you to believe me when I say I REALLY DO UNDERSTAND. And although people may try to blame us, the truth is that sometimes we can do everything in our power and it still isn't enough. We try our best to play by the rules, do everything right, be good, honest, hard-working people, and we still get shat upon by life at every turn. Even so, just know that you are not alone. There are others targeted by life in the same way you are; others who are fighting this same battle beside you. We won't stop because we know that every day we keep living is another day we spit in life's eye. The longer we can keep fighting the more we can give life and the entire world the middle-finger. We can't have success. We can't have love. We can't have a lot of things. But, fuck them all, we can still have defiance.

 

[liverhood]

Remember that you're not alone, and there are resources available to help you through this difficult time. Don't give up!

well, technically everybody is alone in both life and death

 

[thebusislatetonight]

I understand what you mean. Nothing we do is ever good enough, is it? No matter how hard we try, life only slaps us down again. I know because I am there with you. You are not alone.

My situation may be somewhat different but I can empathize. I did everything "right"... I graduated college with a BA, struggled to find professional positions, settled for call center bull shit jobs out of desperation, set up a savings plan, and lost everything I saved to my ex, (pro-tip: NEVER agree to joint accounts.) I finally got a "real job," although I had to accept pittance wages to do it, and then I got screwed over because I was forced to be a "contractor" but not really. I didn't get to set my hours or rates, but management got to play with my hours as much as they like. I had to pay my own taxes (at least twenty percent of earnings no matter how little I earned,) and I was not eligible for overtime so WOW did they ever love working me long hours! So I returned to grad school thinking that would help, struggled to get all A's in my courses, and have just been informed that I may be kicked out anyway because some brainless office hen lost part of my paperwork. I did everything I was supposed to, but I'm still be punished simply for living.

I'm not saying all of this to complain but because I want you to believe me when I say I REALLY DO UNDERSTAND. And although people may try to blame us, the truth is that sometimes we can do everything in our power and it still isn't enough. We try our best to play by the rules, do everything right, be good, honest, hard-working people, and we still get shat upon by life at every turn. Even so, just know that you are not alone. There are others targeted by life in the same way you are; others who are fighting this same battle beside you. We won't stop because we know that every day we keep living is another day we spit in life's eye. The longer we can keep fighting the more we can give life and the entire world the middle-finger. We can't have success. We can't have love. We can't have a lot of things. But, fuck them all, we can still have defiance.

Your post hits me real hard. Yes. Life keeps us trapped. And every moment that you're still breathing is fighting and defying hell. You're absolutely right. We can do everything correctly and still be pushed over.

 

[Caoine01]

"van/vehicle living"

Can you tell me where you park your SUV and how the environment reacts to it. Some time ago I lived in my VW bus in a posh area of a larger city. There I had tried to become invisible in the car. After two weeks, neighbors offered me to use their bathroom. Has anything like this happened to you?

 

[Mthom2]

Well, I haven't been doing it for long. I'm also lucky in that I have a wonderful boss who literally threw a fit when she found out that I was planning to live in my suv. She insisted that I stay in the old family home until it sold, which turned into about 3 months. Then, wanted me to move in with her current family. Of course, I refused because I don't want to impose. She is extremely hard headed, to say the least. So, we came to a compromise. I'd park on her gated property and wouldn't have to feel like I was imposing in her house. Since then, I just park there.

I also have the option of parking at my job, which is a hotel. I do that fairly often since there's free wifi. I've also used truck stops. I've never used a residential neighborhood personally. Though I do know some people have to.

As long as you're clean and respectful most people won't bother you. There are countless tips online though. And every area is going to be different.

I'm also saving up for a camper, on the insistence of my boss, who again wants it on her property. This would give me a little more room. I've been so lucky to have a decent boss, when most people don't. It gives me a lot more options than others have who were forced to live in a vehicle.

One big suggestion I've read online is to stay somewhere different from night to night. One guy said he has 30 different places he cycles through monthly. This way, he's only parking at a specific location once monthly. I thought that was a great idea, and was going to try it myself until better options opened for me.

A good start is CheapRVliving on you tube. This man offers so much information about it.