Story Thank you for existing, SS.

[Lilacmoon]

Hello. You can call me Lilac or something like that probably.

I was good for a year when I relapsed severely a few days ago, and found this haven in between the endless ocean of pro-life websites and spaces. Browsing around, I feel almost validated that you all understand what it is really like, and that I am not going crazy(er?)

My story isn't very dramatic. Born an overahiever with expectations put on my shoulders I could never live up to. Trusted a man too much, and he took advantage of me because I was dependent on him. Wasted lots of money and time trying for a Psych degree when I had a breakdown and dropped out. (Irony?) Found someone I loved, a woman beat up a lot by life like me, but because of the long distance, despite years together, while I was sure on her, to her, I was still just a maybe. This triggered all the worst parts of my BPD all over again. Chronic migraines on top of the pie for some extra seasoning.

Finding this place is like a breath of fresh air. The chill seeping down my spine through my limbs is receding. I feel like I can last a little longer now that I'm here, even though I'm still new here.

Thanks again. Not sure if this post is appropriate or not, but it feels good to type it out.

 

[gayprince.exe]

I have chronic migraines too! Also, I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that we're glad that you feel relieved to find this place. I've recently relapsed badly into my self harm problem so I can kind of relate to you. Hopefully, you'll continue to find solace in this site.

 

[L I F E T O L O S E]

own so cute.
Welcome.

 

[almost_dead]

i love mac N cheese

 

[Sinkinshyp]

Welcome to SS Lilac. I hope you find what you're seeking here. There are many kind people here. We all understand. I'm sorry what has brought you here I only hope you find peace and happiness

 

[Eren]

Welcome. This forum is really the only space on the net where we can freely express ourselves about suicide.

I wish that everyone was happy, that no one had to consider CTB, but better to have the need and have the freedom to do it, than to have the need and not have where to express it.

 

[Lilacmoon]

Thanks for all the warm welcomes, everyone! I wish the best for everyone here, whatever choice we may decide to make in the end. Looking forward to being part of the community, a place like this is truly rare and special.

 

[whywere]

WELCOME!!!!!!!!!! It is so GREAT to have you here new sanctioned suicide global family member!!!! I hope you, like I have since I have been on this site, find that EVERYONE here is so loving,caring and so..so much empathy towards one another. My hope for you is that you find the love and caring that one needs to make some of the most important decisions in ones life.All the FOLKS here are so darn nice that it is, for me the ONLY reason so far that I have NOT ctb. Again..WELCOME..WELCOME and LOVE having you here!!!!!!!!!!

I have chronic migraines too! Also, I'm sure I speak for all of us when I say that we're glad that you feel relieved to find this place. I've recently relapsed badly into my self harm problem so I can kind of relate to you. Hopefully, you'll continue to find solace in this site.

I to have those darn migraines, have had for over 50 years!! My 100% true wish for you is that you find some love and happiness here, we are all here for one another and know that I care and love you and want the best for you in this world and beyond.

 

[The Dark Chaos]

Hey Lilac!! Welcome to our SS familyy. I hope you get to make some good friends here. I'll alwayys be there for you too. I understand what you're saying, I've been off SS for about a few months now and tbh I really missed SS. I'm back now though. Nice to meet you :)

 

[StateOfMind]

Welcome. Lots of cool, funny and smart people on here. Haven't run into any notable idiots so far.

 

[Ghost2211]

It's wonderful to meet you. I'm glad you've found community and comfort here. How often are you having migraines and how severe?

 

[Lilacmoon]

WELCOME!!!!!!!!!! It is so GREAT to have you here new sanctioned suicide global family member!!!! I hope you, like I have since I have been on this site, find that EVERYONE here is so loving,caring and so..so much empathy towards one another. My hope for you is that you find the love and caring that one needs to make some of the most important decisions in ones life.All the FOLKS here are so darn nice that it is, for me the ONLY reason so far that I have NOT ctb. Again..WELCOME..WELCOME and LOVE having you here!!!!!!!!!!

I to have those darn migraines, have had for over 50 years!! My 100% true wish for you is that you find some love and happiness here, we are all here for one another and know that I care and love you and want the best for you in this world and beyond.

While I'm happy to find others to share the migraines, I'm also sad too :( Wouldn't want anyone but the worst people to have them.

It's wonderful to meet you. I'm glad you've found community and comfort here. How often are you having migraines and how severe?

They pulse in and out during the day, usually worse during mornings and late at night, making sleeping difficult. The severity varies from a constant twinge around my head and behind my eyes (Which I can tolerate), to rendering me barely functional, almost incapacitated from the throbbing and lights and noise. (Which is less favorable.)

 

[Ghost2211]

They pulse in and out during the day, usually worse during mornings and late at night, making sleeping difficult. The severity varies from a constant twinge around my head and behind my eyes (Which I can tolerate), to rendering me barely functional, almost incapacitated from the throbbing and lights and noise. (Which is less favorable.)

Sorry to hear. Chronic pain makes everything harder. If you're ever interesting I can share so tactics and med ideas that have helped me over the years.

 

[Lilacmoon]

Sorry to hear. Chronic pain makes everything harder. If you're ever interesting I can share so tactics and med ideas that have helped me over the years.

If it's cheap or affordable, I'd love to hear what has worked for you! Student life makes extra spending rather touch and go.

 

[Ghost2211]

If it's cheap or affordable, I'd love to hear what has worked for you! Student life makes extra spending rather touch and go.

Advil seems to be more effective the sooner the better, so the very first symptoms. neurologists have told me never take Tylenol for migraine it can make it worse or cause rebound headache. Zofran is an amazing life saver for nausea, works very fast. You can get it from primary care doctor.

Interestingly I've found putting counter pressure on the part of my head that hurts tends to help, so if it's behind my left eye laying on right side and pressing left are onto the left eye socket.

 

[Lilacmoon]

Advil seems to be more effective the sooner the better, so the very first symptoms. neurologists have told me never take Tylenol for migraine it can make it worse or cause rebound headache. Zofran is an amazing life saver for nausea, works very fast. You can get it from primary care doctor.

Interestingly I've found putting counter pressure on the part of my head that hurts tends to help, so if it's behind my left eye laying on right side and pressing left are onto the left eye socket.

Advil is a blood thinner, so it helps with both my bradycardia (irregular/slow heartbeat) and my migraines, though I have to be a little careful with it. I nearly OD's on tylenol once, and ever since my migraines intensify when I think about taking it. Probably a psychological symptom? Never heard of Zofran before, but I'll ask about it with my doctor. The nausea can be debilitating, but if that can help, I'm eager to give it a shot.

I use pressure too, though usually on the same side. I'll try counter pressure and see if it helps.

Thank you for the advice, that was really kind of you!