Help Tech help - do prepaid internet laptops or tablets or modems or anything??? exist that can be hidden from a digital snoop with shared accounts…??

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Hey
Apologies for not understanding tech stuff that is easy for others. I'm trying really hard to wrap my head around it but doing a poor job. I'm still living with my ex & it is not fun at all but I'm trying to stay here a bit longer so I don't have to deal with finding somewhere else when I have my SN & plan to CTB soon. I only have access to an iPhone but need to change that. It took me forever & ever to find SaSu, set up my own apple stuff (but am not sure what he still has access to…), get a VPN, join from a blocked country, get a secret email address that definitely doesn't auto save a password anywhere, set up Paysend, get a link for DMC, order, pay, receive etc. And all with only a few bits of time I can grab here & there. And before I found this site, I'd never heard of SN or any such thing - I have learnt one thing after another & instead of encouraging me, it's freaking me out about what I still don't know. So I want to properly research & it's pretty much impossible just on an iPhone & I really need to dig down & research & plan. All other computers & tablets etc are shared access - he actually built my desktop from scratch. So he's a geek & a snoop & will use what he can against me & it could turn nasty & I'm defs trying to avoid that. He always knows stuff that he can only know from access to my phone or email or whatever so I think he's installed something or just has access to what he shouldn't. I wrote a dummy grocery list on my phone of stuff that we never ever buy & he came home with it all & tried to gaslight me but it was just a test. So I don't know what he knows. But I just cannot, under any circumstances, use any other digital things at home - I don't know enough to hide everything, I don't doubt he's spying on me & will use what he can & I'm a bit scared. I've got zero money & so hadn't looked into getting anything else for myself. But now I'm thinking of just hocking something, even my wedding ring, to get a tablet or laptop. But I need to be smart & be able to hide absolutely everything from him. So I want to steer clear of Apple in case I fuck anything up & it goes in shared cloud or anything. I'm in Australia & want to steer clear of Telstra - that's who we use for home internet & mobiles & such & still on a shared plan. I was thinking of getting a laptop preferably to have a good keyboard or a tablet that I can attach a keyboard - it will be bottom of the range stuff I'm sure, but a big screen, touch typing & saving stuff will be life/death changing. I need this. But because I know nothing, it only just occurred to me that I'd have to connect it to stuff at home - modems & routers & whatever, all of which I assume will be impossible for me to set up without knowing all our details & also easy for him to see new devices or people connected. It had not occurred to me & when it did, I felt punched in the stomach, at such a near miss, out of ignorance. I have limited access to the internet & limited time. I only have one legit excuse I can use at both work & home to go AWOL for a few days & I'm saving that to actually CTB. And I medically can't drive so am limited to what's nearby or I can somehow get & I'm not confident of having anything delivered here. There's a "chance" I can get it sent to work but that's not ideal. So if I know exactly what I'm looking for, I can make calls from work, go to what's in walking distance or get a taxi to a one off place. But I need to have all my bases covered. I can't afford to get it wrong. If he sees any evidence of this…. I have one shot to CTB. I want to take full notes of how to test SN, find a rural hotel or caravan park, read the differences between the successful & unsuccessful attempts, come up with a regimen, post it, get people's advice, all of it. But on a iPhone that I'm too scared to open links, can't see a large screen, can't touch type, can't save things on, it's just never going to happen. So what the fuck do I do? I don't know what I don't know. I know it can't be Apple, it can't be Telstra, it can't be anything connected at home, it can't be anything he can see as a nearby user or whatever. I need internet but I don't understand how much I need. I need a laptop or a tablet that can have a keyboard attached. I need it to be cheap or cheap-ish. But the big thing is - is there a way to get a prepaid laptop or tablet? Or a modem? Or anything? Especially something not on an ongoing plan with paperwork, just something I can top up?? Like the old school mobile / cell phones???
What am I looking for?
How do I not get detected?
I'm sorry I don't know any of this stuff & I don't know how to find out when I don't have any privacy or skills & the fear of being caught is so overwhelming. But so is the fear of how long research will take on a phone & what I could miss & get wrong when I only have one chance to CTB. We are still legally married & he threatens calling crisis teams for me when I don't do what he wants - he is a very believable person that looks rational & in control & if I was anyone else in the world, I'd believe him too….it's not good. At all. Any help appreciated. I gotta get this right so I can go. Please help.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

TL;DR Get your own device, use unique passwords and accounts that your ex-partner doesn't know of, use TOR or VPN for surfing. When they can't access your device they can't know of anything you do on it.

 

[motoko_s9]

How is the 4G where you are? I don't know anything about Australia but is it possible to buy an Android phone, add data allowance to it and set it up as your own Wifi Access point and connect to it from the laptop?

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Ooof! I do not know the answer to most of that. Australia had a dumb internet thing called NBN that flopped. I work a couple of blocks from home & we just upgraded everything to 5G & I "think" that's what I have on my phone & at home - I know right before the work upgrade, the whole area went out of internet but my ex was still working from home without any issues & I think the 5G was the difference. I'm not sure. I appreciate your response but I will have to google all the things, sorry. If I attempt this, is there any way he could see that there's more or different wifi in the house? Or if I attempt to set up a wifi access point (I don't know what that is…) could I do it wrong & accidentally set up to the house or him in some way? Or is it the kind of thing I could ask people in a computer store to set up for me? Because it's a thing they do often? Because I'm an idiot? Or a service I could pay for in store? Is it that kind of thing? I really am clueless & time poor & scared so I really appreciate the response & I'm sorry for piling on more questions. But the more I learn now, the less I have to chase up & can just make super quick calls from work when no one's around, see if that store does it, if they don't, do they know who does, call them, ask the same short questions, go in, set up & then have proper access to the entire interwebs safely…. I can also then fib that my shifts got extended or I got extra shifts & go to a coffee shop & research thoroughly. Take notes. Plan. Make it happen. I'm hoping to have CTB'd before there'd be evidence of missing pay, or at least I could claim it was a payroll error that I'm chasing up. I think I've only told him one lie so far - I'm not good at it & I have to plan it in advance because if I'm asked a direct question, I'll give a direct answer - this is how I've lived my life & I'm very proud of my honesty & integrity, & it sucks to think I have to give that up at the end of my life, sucks for me, not for him. Lying comes easily & often for him & I didn't know the extent until recently… Sorry, the point is I need as much help as possible to make this impossible to find out - if it's something computer / phone stores do regularly, as a service, I'm happy to pursue. Obviously at the moment, I have neither an android phone or a laptop, so I guess going somewhere that sells both would be my best option?? Instead of going to a phone store? And then a computer store? I thought maybe there'd just be some sort of prepaid option that would exist just for old people to Facebook their grandkids or something,(!!) & I could just do that…

 

[motoko_s9]

He might be able to see there is a Wifi access point but whether he can tell there is a neighbour's one or not, is another matter.

You could directly tether the laptop to the phone using a USB cable and bypass WiFi, or use a USB dongle instead of a phone. It is possible to get a tablet (or maybe a laptop as well) with a sim card slot for 4G.

 

[Hvergelmir]

For whatever it's worth, you're almost certainly overestimating his abilities. Without knowledge he's literally a tech wizard. And it's quite common to purposefully be silent about the limits of ones capabilities.
Apple devices are notoriously hard to break into. He most likely just stole your passwords, by looking at you inputting it. If he's very tech savvy, he could then have installed something on it. I think you should use the system you're most comfortable with. Android will not bolster your security (though it's also sufficiently secure).

TL;DR Get your own device, use unique passwords and accounts that your ex-partner doesn't know of, use TOR or VPN for surfing. When they can't access your device they can't know of anything you do on it.

Realistically this is all protection you need.

With TOR no one will know what sites/servers you visit, but they could see that you're visiting a TOR relay.
With a VPN, only the VPN provider knows what sites/servers you visit. Others could see that you're contacting a VPN provider, though.

Modern basic encryption is something you'll get automatically, and makes it so no one can see what you transmit, even if they know the recipient. Tor and VPNs ensures that encryption is applied to absolutely everything, but it already is on anything important.

Millions of people (including very rich people) do banking online, without knowledge of security. Modern communication is very safe, unless your device is physically breached or your login credentials are shared/stolen.
Use unique passwords to compartmentalize security. You don't want one unlikely leak to give access too all your accounts. Avoid recovery questions that someone else can guess.

I hope that crash course in computer security offers you some piece of mind. Use a new device with a personal account and a new password, and you'll be fine.
Ask in a store for local 4G Internet options.

On a more personal note, you might want to divorce, get your own place, and think things through. CTB:ing while still in a stressful relationship riddled with paranoia, might not be the greatest idea. The idea of just having one chance to CTB is wrong. You'll have many chances, with new ones coming up all the time.

 

[ham and potatoes]

Get a USB stick, and install "tails" on it.
You can then boot your PC from that, and it won't save anything to the pc. Check out the link below
https://tails.net/

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I think it really sounds like he has installed spyware on your phone that can log your keystrokes, sites you visit, etc and then it reports all that info back to him. Really, all you need to do is take your device to a "repair" store, have them clean your phone with whatever is on it, and change all your passwords for everything after that. If you connect to the wifi in your house, he'll be able to see it's you since your device has a unique identifying number that you can't change (easily), but he won't be able to see anything specific you do on the phone anymore. He *could* block you from connecting to the wifi, though, if he wanted to.

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Thanks. I'm fine using VPN's - I've got opera on my desktop & proton on my phone. I don't know what TOR is. When we split, I changed the passwords to everything I could think of, including my iPhone, all different, none of them auto saved, all handwritten only & stored outside of this house, somewhere he can't access. Got my own appleid, no find my iPhone, no family sharing or whatever. So I did the things I knew how to do. And yet, he still knows things he couldn't know any other way.
My concern is things I don't know. If I just buy a laptop or tablet, I have to connect to the home internet & I can't do that. So what I need to know is how to have an independent internet source, that isn't through an ongoing monthly plan, that I don't accidentally connect to anything of his or that he can see in any way. My decision to CTB is independent of this but it is influencing my time frame. I'd be happy to go tonight if I had enough information to be sure I'd be successful. Part of what I want to research is the difference between successful & unsuccessful attempts. And other people may have a million opportunities to do this, but I believe it to be true that I just have the one chance & need to seize it. I didn't come here to hang around, no disrespect to anyone else, I just came here to get as much help as possible, with the things I don't know, so that I can achieve one thing and soon. There are a tonne of crazy life circumstances that need to be worked around, causing most of the issues. Maybe I'll just block my caller ID & calll a computer store…The digital snooping is real as is the physical snooping - I noticed things out of place so I repeatedly lined different things up in particular ways before work & come home to them moved - in my personal drawers & such where he'd never have the need to be. It's why I've stored a few things permanently out of the house, kept on my person, or wrapped so heavily & hidden, there'd be no way for him to rewrap - it wouldn't stop him opening but at least I'd know immediately.
I just want a safe way to access the internet for a few weeks, not forever, to see this project through, without worrying about what I'm fucking up, what he can see & how he could use that against me - because he would.
Sorry, that only just posted now & I wrote it yesterday but haven't reread... I'm not that fussed if he keeps tracking my phone stuff - if I get that fixed it'll be a red flag to him that I've finally learnt a tech thing & he'll want to know why… Getting my own Apple ID & changing my phone password was definitely a surprise to him that I was questioned about. It's not great here.
And I definitely can't use the desktops at home - apart from worrying about leaving a trail, it's also easy to see from everywhere in the house that you're on it & he often works from home using it. So no guaranteed access & easily seen as soon as you open the door & I can't take to another room or coffee shop. So a laptop preferably or a tablet. And I'll hopefully always be able to keep either of those items hidden or offsite & with unique passwords, so I'm not that worried if he found that as well. I'll have to pre think of a lie, maybe even scratch the outside a bit & saying a friend handed it down to me… The real concern is connecting to the internet in a way he can't see, that isn't connected in any way to him or the house or our accounts. Using a dongle or a SIM card sounds "easier" for me to try & achieve & I'll look into that, even though I don't know what they are, they sound like "easy" words to google or ask a computer store. It's difficult when you don't know anything, if you're asking for something that already exists & normal people know about & takes 2 seconds for them to explain or if you're asking for something that doesn't exist or is stupid. I apologise for the ignorance. If I had the time to join a different forum for every problem in this process, I could reach out to different fields like tech. But I only have SaSu so have been leaning on it really really heavily for advice as I need help & don't have anywhere else to go. I have received much generosity here - people sharing their skills & time & understanding that I'm in a tight spot knowledge wise & time wise & have just helped with things I can't do by myself. I appreciate any responses. Thank you very much.
Ha! I accidentally sent both posts as one - 1 I thought I sent last night, then thought I sent now without rereading & then the 2nd starting from Sorry onwards. It's pretty clear that even basic things are beyond me. I'm fucking useless at all of this - the one thing I want to get right. As in CTB. Heartbreaking & soul destroying in a time when what led me here was already horrific. Thanks for your time guys. I'm so sorry.

 

[spottem]

Have your circumstances changed? How are you doing today?

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Have your circumstances changed? How are you doing today?

No change in a good way. It's all worse which is just unbelievable to me. He's definitely still in my stuff - a few things popped up the other day & I got a young person (!!) to look at it for me & it took them 2 seconds to see how he was accessing multiple email addresses of mine. I have what I hope is a secret one, in that I've never told him about & haven't autosaved passwords etc. But I don't know how much tracking he's doing. I uninstalled a bunch of apps. Changed more passwords. But when I could see he was in my emails again, I couldn't see how, even after googling. But the kid took 2 seconds. I went home & confronted him about it & that was fucking stupid. I knew it was stupid when I did it. Everything is worse & I have less time alone, no privacy. My decision to CTB is independent of him & is not impulsive. I have been making this decision gradually & then finally. It's not just escape him & you'll be fine. It's health issues & complicated life circumstances & a bunch of things that can't improve, even if I tried. He's just making everything worse. I tried looking into the laptop thing but didn't get far. Have temporarily abandoned, maybe permanently. I don't know. I didn't learn enough to feel confident. I don't live near Apple geniuses to fix my phone but was hoping to make a special trip but then realised he would know if everything he was doing was somehow removed. And that that would be stupid. I'm trying (please god, that I don't believe in, please) get enough alone time to test my SN. Both blood & aquarium. And please god please let it be legit. I don't have a backup source & didn't want to open & test until CTB day but I can't take the anxiety of it anymore. So attempting to test ASAP but am worried I'll fuck it up - I haven't read the full instructions on how to do yet & I'm horrifically bad at following instructions & math & science &'it appears every fucking thing. I am so useless at all of this. Plus struggling to find blood pics that aren't links - too scared to click anything. Someone kindly sent me a pic but was hoping for more. I came on SaSu now to read the instructions & crack on while I had the house to myself for once, but have ended up procrastinating out of fear & dread so have written you a rambling batshit crazy message instead of Just. Doing. The. Thing. Crazy with anxiety I'll do it wrong or not be able to do it all. Anxiety I'll get busted. Anxiety I'll spill it or contaminate it & won't have enough. And the dread in the bottom of both my stomach & my soul that I've been scammed & just don't know what to do with that as an outcome. I hope you're ok - being on SaSu generally isn't a great sign…Thanks for asking how I am, but they say don't ask questions you don't want answers to & I've just written all this drivel. Sorry. Thanks.

 

[Worndown]

A burn phone. You just don't register it to a real person or place.
Takes some effort, but will work.
Just do not contact anyone you know with it so any tracing is thwarted.

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

A burn phone. You just don't register it to a real person or place.
Takes some effort, but will work.
Just do not contact anyone you know with it so any tracing is thwarted.

Thanks. But I was hoping to get something with a keyboard etc to help speed up the research - it's painfully slow. But with a burner, I'd at least be able to keep it hidden & save stuff. But I think a big screen to read a lot of stuff quickly & a keyboard to touch type is still the dream. I just don't think I'm gonna make it happen. Not enough time, money or knowledge - I can hock something for the money - just can't overcome the other hurdles right now. Thanks for answering.

 

[smaragdyne]

It sounds like you want something lightweight, like a Chromebook. They're about the cheapest laptop you can buy.

Also, if you're worried about a large device being more easily surveilled (very valid concern), you could do what's called "booting from USB" where you actually install the operating system on a USB flash drive, and with a little configuring, you actually run the computer off of that while it's plugged in. It's slow, but it works.

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

It sounds like you want something lightweight, like a Chromebook. They're about the cheapest laptop you can buy.

Also, if you're worried about a large device being more easily surveilled (very valid concern), you could do what's called "booting from USB" where you actually install the operating system on a USB flash drive, and with a little configuring, you actually run the computer off of that while it's plugged in. It's slow, but it works.

Thanks so much. My CTB date has moved forward a few times due to unforeseen circumstances, just lots of shitty stuff with shitty timing. But it's getting to the point where maybe it's like trying to find the perfect tattoo - it doesn't exist. I think if I make it through the next week & things go ok instead of more craziness, then late next week I can maybe start writing my protocol & post & get people to spot the flaws, pick a date & just do it with what I have now. But if life keeps throwing me more obstacles that move the date forward again & I think I can get some solid research in, I'll have a crack at exactly what you said above. I didn't get a chance to do more research on tech but I did manage to call the local tech store that I'd be buying from if they offer services to set stuff up & they said they do. I forgot to ask if they can do it in store (!!), it was a super quick sneaky call but they definitely can come to me & obvs I don't want that but I've asked someone if I can do it at theirs & they said yes so that's a possibility. I could never in a million zillion years predicted what's happening at the moment (separate & worse than what first brought me here…) so I'm gonna stop giving myself deadlines that make me feel shit for missing. It's still 100 percent this year. I really fucking hope I can make August. Cross your fingers for me. And thanks so much for your time. I appreciate it.