Story Surviving ctb is embarrassing

[d3j3ct3dl0s3r05]

A couple months ago, my grand CTB plot (which I had planned for multiple weeks) got foiled due to my own stupidity (disclosed my location on the phone and honestly talking to anyone in general tbh) and I found myself "arrested" (they threatened to handcuff me so close enough tbh) and had to wait in the back of a cold paddy wagon before being transferred to hospital where I got put in an exceptionally shite psych ward for god knows how long with no activities and no therapy, except a highly dismissive and arrogant doctor that dismissed literally every mental health concern I brought up (like sir I am in a psych ward why would I make this up). After about a week and a half of trying to sleep through screaming and people being restrained, I was discharged and immediately went for my phone only to discover a couple messages asking if I was ok. Got worse when I returned school and teachers kept asking about it. Like I would rather forget about it all. It's worse when family members get involved and you start to feel like "that one family member"

This time I'm going to try to stfu for once to avoid this. Idk if could bear to deal with condescending hospital staff.

 

[nicotine_goblin]

I wouldn't say it's embarrassing, ctb is hard. And you had no idea they were actually gonna arrest you basically. I can relate to the hospital situation, last time for me back in july was horrid as well, felt like I was imprisoned for trying to off myself. I went on my own though after multiple failed attempts because my parents were extremely worried and asked me to

 

[SexyIncél]

No shame! People only really start seeing their society when they probe it. Experimentation. Clears away the false/incomplete theories programmed into their heads

 

[Pyxel]

There is no shame! I hope to have your amount of courage for a ctb attempt very soon. Truthfully speaking the consequences of a failed attempt terrifies me. Having everyone treat you differently & be viewed in the family "as that person."