Suicide topic with therapist

[Deleted member 23009]

My first post here, scary >.<

Anyway I was thinking of bringing up my suicidal thoughts to my therapist just to talk about it and i'm curious to what she thinks or how she will respond, but I feel it could be good to talk to someone face to face about it and just vent maybe. I'm not sure if it's a good idea or if there will be consequences. I doubt she will look at it the same way I do, since not many people do but I assume she would understand at least but i'm a bit conflicted.

Has anyone some experience with that? What are your thoughts? Obviously it depends a lot indvidually but was just curious if anyone had some tips.

 

[PointlessStruggle]

My brother once brought it up with his therapist and his therapist bailed out of fear that he would ctb and the dude didn't want it to ruin his career. Not sure if all of them would do the same but in my personal experience they bail

 

[woxihuanni]

Pack a suitcase in case you get locked up.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

All therapists agreed to work with me on the basis that "I wasn't suicidal" and dropped me if I mentioned suicide. They don't want to risk ruining their careers.

 

[darksideofthebright]

I think therapy experiences vary from one person to another. If you are lucky, this might be the one that can support you; but note in mind, therapy can a be a process of trials and errors.

I have brought up suicidal thoughts with my therapist, and she helped me get to the roots of my thoughts to really understand and see it from a different perspective. I, personally, try to be as rational as I possibly can, and so I always appreciate people's perspectives.

Professionally speaking, a therapist SHOULD NOT or CANNOT advise one on or against anything. Instead, they should guide the conversation. Therefore, as soon as you feel like they are inserting themselves and their personal opinions during the conversation, it might be worth (re)considering the topic(s) you will be talking about in the future.

Once again, I'm not sure how the system works where you are. But in the UK, you can look at a therapist's background, experiences, expertise, etc. so if you can do so and do not see them having a lot of experiences with suicide/suicidal thoughts, it might be worth not bringing it up because they might not be equipped and strong enough for the conversation.

Either way, I hope it goes well for you whatever you decide to do. (Sorry for the long reply!)

 

[Deleted member 23009]

My brother once brought it up with his therapist and his therapist bailed out of fear that he would ctb and the dude didn't want it to ruin his career. Not sure if all of them would do the same but in my personal experience they bail

All therapists agreed to work with me on the basis that "I wasn't suicidal" and dropped me if I mentioned suicide. They don't want to risk ruining their careers.

That is horrible wtf, a therapist exists to help and guide people but i guess some people care more about their career than helping someone, even though their job literally is to help people. Incredibly stupid and wrong people for the job.

Pack a suitcase in case you get locked up.

Don't think they can do that to me here but yeah I guess I should be on my guard.

I think therapy experiences vary from one person to another. If you are lucky, this might be the one that can support you; but note in mind, therapy can a be a process of trials and errors.

I have brought up suicidal thoughts with my therapist, and she helped me get to the roots of my thoughts to really understand and see it from a different perspective. I, personally, try to be as rational as I possibly can, and so I always appreciate people's perspectives.

Professionally speaking, a therapist SHOULD NOT or CANNOT advise one on or against anything. Instead, they should guide the conversation. Therefore, as soon as you feel like they are inserting themselves and their personal opinions during the conversation, it might be worth (re)considering the topic(s) you will be talking about in the future.

Once again, I'm not sure how the system works where you are. But in the UK, you can look at a therapist's background, experiences, expertise, etc. so if you can do so and do not see them having a lot of experiences with suicide/suicidal thoughts, it might be worth not bringing it up because they might not be equipped and strong enough for the conversation.

Either way, I hope it goes well for you whatever you decide to do. (Sorry for the long reply!)

It seems you have a good therapist and had some good talks with them. I hope i'm lucky like that too, unlike the others in this thread. Yeah that's a good point about testing the waters and see her reaction or if she inserts her own opinions or try to tell me to do something.

i think i'll give it a try to see the reaction and based on that i'll keep going into details or not.

and don't apologize over a long post silly, i'm glad you took your time to reply

 

[Ghost2211]

As mandated reporters you're going to get yourself in trouble if you mention a plan, intentions, or a method. You can talk about suicidal feelings, but can't really talk about the full topic without repercussions.

 

[HelloHell]

I brought up my suicidal thoughts (thoughts, not intent). He knows about my previous attempt too. I told him that i feel like life has no meaning and everything is pointless, so why must i live just to suffer? He asked me if i have any reason to stay alive, and i answered no. He then asked why i am still alive rn and not proceed to ctb, i answered "i think it's not time yet"
I gotta say i'm quite lucky he still wants to listen to me and try to understand where i'm coming from even though he's definitely against the idea of ctb

my advice if you dont want to be sent to hospital is dont mention intent/plan, and definitely dont mention timeline, and try to convince your psych that you're not impulsive
it shoud be fine if you just talk about suicidal thoughts

 

[Deleted member 23009]

As mandated reporters you're going to get yourself in trouble if you mention a plan, intentions, or a method. You can talk about suicidal feelings, but can't really talk about the full topic without repercussions.

Yeah no I wouldn't mention any plans or anything, just general thoughts about the subject. Not planning to go into detail about methods either, just casually talk about it.

I brought up my suicidal thoughts (thoughts, not intent). He knows about my previous attempt too. I told him that i feel like life has no meaning and everything is pointless, so why must i live just to suffer? He asked me if i have any reason to stay alive, and i answered no. He then asked why i am still alive rn and not proceed to ctb, i answered "i think it's not time yet"
I gotta say i'm quite lucky he still wants to listen to me and try to understand where i'm coming from even though he's definitely against the idea of ctb

my advice if you dont want to be sent to hospital is dont mention intent/plan, and definitely dont mention timeline, and try to convince your psych that you're not impulsive
it shoud be fine if you just talk about suicidal thoughts

That's nice that he listens even tho he's against it. As long as he doesn't try to force you to do something or create a bad situation for you with involving others or something. But yeah as I stated above I won't go into detail about methods/intentions. Just general talk.

 

[Caspers]

In the UK, a therapist (or any other authoritative figure) cannot section you (put you in hospital against your will) unless you are a harm to yourself and/or others. Basically if you say you want to CTB but have no plans or recourses to do it, then they are not able to section you (although they can advise).

If you mention you have meds to do it with, or are about to buy what is needed, depending on the relationship, they have a legal duty of care to section you. So you are free to say 'I want to die', but if you say 'I want to die, I am researching methods and writing my note', then you are likely to be taken in. This is my knowledge in the UK, the NHS website also has some info. If you're in a different country, it may be different. Maybe go on your government/community mental health's website and see what they have to say about involuntary admission.

I personally would suggest you talk about it. My therapist knows I want to CTB and he knows I have a plan, but he knows it would break my trust if he did something, so he's sitting still. Showing you are afraid of hospitalisation could help them understand you better too

 

[Deleted member 23009]

In the UK, a therapist (or any other authoritative figure) cannot section you (put you in hospital against your will) unless you are a harm to yourself and/or others. Basically if you say you want to CTB but have no plans or recourses to do it, then they are not able to section you (although they can advise).

If you mention you have meds to do it with, or are about to buy what is needed, depending on the relationship, they have a legal duty of care to section you. So you are free to say 'I want to die', but if you say 'I want to die, I am researching methods and writing my note', then you are likely to be taken in. This is my knowledge in the UK, the NHS website also has some info. If you're in a different country, it may be different. Maybe go on your government/community mental health's website and see what they have to say about involuntary admission.

I personally would suggest you talk about it. My therapist knows I want to CTB and he knows I have a plan, but he knows it would break my trust if he did something, so he's sitting still. Showing you are afraid of hospitalisation could help them understand you better too

Yeah I don't live in the uk but i'm fairly certain it's the same here basically. I'll look it up. Thank you for your suggestion, i think i'll try talk about it a little bit.

 

[Caspers]

Yeah I don't live in the uk but i'm fairly certain it's the same here basically. I'll look it up. Thank you for your suggestion, i think i'll try talk about it a little bit.

Great, it's super brave to open up, and if you do, you'll get a lot closer to your therapist. You'll also learn what they believe about suicide, maybe when you're more comfortable, you could ask their opinion on the topic, although you may not agree with her answers. If she's a good therapist, she will be thankful about your honesty

 

[sadworld]

As mandated reporters you're going to get yourself in trouble if you mention a plan, intentions, or a method. You can talk about suicidal feelings, but can't really talk about the full topic without repercussions.

Yes this is correct. I've talked with my therapist about my suicidal thoughts but if they ask you if you have any plans you need to say no or you might get locked up.

 

[Deleted member 23009]

Yes this is correct. I've talked with my therapist about my suicidal thoughts but if they ask you if you have any plans you need to say no or you might get locked up.

The question is, do i have a hero that will break me out?
jokes aside yeah, i'll definitely keep that in mind..

 

[sadworld]

The question is, do i have a hero that will break me out?
jokes aside yeah, i'll definitely keep that in mind..

You know that I'll be here for you

 

[Deleted member 23009]

You know that I'll be here for you

Always knew I could count on you

 

[HelloHell]

That's nice that he listens even tho he's against it. As long as he doesn't try to force you to do something or create a bad situation for you with involving others or something. But yeah as I stated above I won't go into detail about methods/intentions. Just general talk.

yeah he even thanked me for being honest with him
I hope it goes well with your therapist! hopefully they will be understanding of your situation. Good luck :)

 

[elfgyoza]

I've admitted I have the means and intent to do it before and yet I've never been threatened with a psych ward stay. It's weird in the UK, a lot of mental health nurses are completely fine knowing you have the means to kill yourself, they only act if you say you're going to do something soon lol
I'd maybe have a google to find the guidelines in your country @dancingrain? Might have more specific info

 

[FatalSystemError591]

Twice I had super understanding therapists. He nailed down that my suicidal ideation was a coping mechanism for escapism and it was a way for my outbursts to be channeled since at the time I "did not have intent", my therapist now knows and I told her about what the last one told me. She doesn't know I have as much intent as I do, and knows that if I did I wanted to find the least painless possible, "but I haven't found a way that wouldn't put myself in pain so I am not going yet" which is not entirely true I have found a couple methods.

 

[Cherrypea]

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/i-think-i-shocked-my-new-therapist.53380/

I told my new therapist on Monday.

 

[TheLostCause]

I was in CBT therapy and told her i was suicidal and making plans. Got dropped by her and passed onto someone else who saw me once and referred be back to the doctors with a suggestion of med increase on med that clearly wasn't helping. Ended up being the doctors demanding they do another assessment and offer more support. Ended up in the care of a crisis team. That 1 doctor did more than all the other professionals who are meant to be professionals in mh. But nope that 1 doctor got things sorted.

 

[Deleted member 23009]

They can only really force me to be put in here if I'm a danger to other members of society. And if I mention specific plans about suicide they might put me in for my own "safety" but there's no guarantee. So I won't go into any details about that. Should be fine to just casually talk about the subject.

Sorry for everyone that had unpleasant experiences with therapists. The mental health standard can really variate so much depending on the therapist and where you live. I really wish the system was more helpful and developed. Thank you for all the replies though

 

[Giraffey]

I once opened up to a locum doctor about suicide, I confessed to him that I was feeling suicidal and had the necessary skills and knowledge to act upon it. He replied, in a calm and non-judgmental manner, I'll never forget his words: "When a doctor wishes to commit suicide, there is nothing we can do to stop them". I felt heard. He offered me to reflect again on my thoughts and come back and see him the following week either way. There was never any discussion of being sectioned or being a danger.

As a clinician, I've encountered clients with suicidal thoughts a handful of times and I don't think there is a single occasion yet where I've felt it necessary to report someone. There is more value in listening to people's feelings and understanding what lies at their root, the duty to report can be interpreted with a degree of clinical judgement and common sense, provided someone isn't in immediate danger. But it very much does depend on the confidence and competence of your therapist/professional, indeed their own personal beliefs and the level of trust between you both.

It's not something that I would raise with a professional during the first session, but if there is a bond of trust, and the subject is introduced and explored in a sensitive manner then it's something that I think can and should be talked about openly during a session.

 

[Lilacmoon]

hello and welcome.
be careful.
involuntary inpatienting is not for the faint of heart.

 

[Nurse T]

I have attempted suicide, and I have discussed plans with a counsellor and MH team, and I have not been sectioned, if you find the right ones to understand they only want to help, and they can only truly understand if your honest and show you want the help x

 

[torimandy]

If you are in America, if the therapist thinks you are serious they will put you through a way fun little exercise. You will get to go to a hospital to be evaluated. If they determine you are serious you will get to stay in a hospital bed 24/7, being watched until there is a mental health facility that will admit you. As soon as they find one(sometimes 2 or 3 weeks ) you get to o basically to jail with lots of drugs and be evaluated again. Thats when the 72 hour hold begins.

You will learn that you never mention this to a therapist again and you will learn to lie about your feelings as it the only way they let you out of the mental health facility, which is nothing more than a jail with better medication than a normal jail.

Good luck with this tactic as it's geared to make it so you will lie to your therapist from then on under the fear of involuntary incarceration.

 

[hoping to lose hope]

My first post here, scary >.<

Anyway I was thinking of bringing up my suicidal thoughts to my therapist just to talk about it and i'm curious to what she thinks or how she will respond, but I feel it could be good to talk to someone face to face about it and just vent maybe. I'm not sure if it's a good idea or if there will be consequences. I doubt she will look at it the same way I do, since not many people do but I assume she would understand at least but i'm a bit conflicted.

Has anyone some experience with that? What are your thoughts? Obviously it depends a lot indvidually but was just curious if anyone had some tips.

Op it is good you want to talk to your therapist about this sort of thing and if you are worried about being locked up in a sanitorium dont unless you discuss plans with a date.
Can I ask if you have tried this?: have you tried to just verbalize yourself in your room? When you have privacy just talking about your feelings can help so much and it does help regardless of if there is a human to hear you or not.
No one should feel the way our types do so anything that brings some sense of relief is nice.
I am not a pro life optimist spouting normie but I am open to talk to I do enjoy hearing other peoples thoughts.

Has your therapist been good so far?
Have you tried any types of therapy and do you really want to try help yourself?

 

[Deleted member 23009]

Op it is good you want to talk to your therapist about this sort of thing and if you are worried about being locked up in a sanitorium dont unless you discuss plans with a date.
Can I ask if you have tried this?: have you tried to just verbalize yourself in your room? When you have privacy just talking about your feelings can help so much and it does help regardless of if there is a human to hear you or not.
No one should feel the way our types do so anything that brings some sense of relief is nice.
I am not a pro life optimist spouting normie but I am open to talk to I do enjoy hearing other peoples thoughts.

Has your therapist been good so far?
Have you tried any types of therapy and do you really want to try help yourself?

I feel a bit cringe talking about my own feelings so doing it with myself feels kind of weird, i'm not the best at talking. But I'll keep that in mind.

My therapist is good, lately I've been having mixed feelings but it's mostly due to me not being able to explain things properly or be 100% comfortable talking about my feelings. It''s my second therapist, better than the first for sure. It's very up and down for me. I didn't seek any help for myself for many years and after a lot of bad things happening and a failed suicide attempt with me ending up at the hospital I thought I might try and get better. I'm not sure the reason why but I thought I would at least try. I'm very conflicted in how I feel, I don't really care about living and have wanted to die many times. Also after my suicide attempt I was sent straight home after I got patched together, despite them knowing what I wanted so it's pretty laid back here (if that's good or bad).

In all honesty I'm not sure anymore, I started seeking help for a recovery but lately idk, my medication keeps me quite dormant. I have SN and everything ready to go but obviously I wouldn't mention that. We'll see what happens i guess.

 

[hoping to lose hope]

I felt really cringe as well at first talking about my feelings with myself but it totally works and from what I have read it is most of the reason talk therapy with a therapist works.
Have you considered maybe typing up some of the things you wish to share and handing the therapist your text to read?
I have found this helpful personally as some things are just really hard to say and even after being largely comfortable with my psychologist there are things I do not mention verbally.
I ask my psych if there is anything I should think about during the week at the end of my session.

It is weird I do not know if it will apply to you but we can just flat out not wanting to help ourselves as convinced we will not improve or we do try but stop as well.You could ask if you could get into a therapy that would help you :3
I never mention having SN either as I think they may send people to take it away lolz

 

[Deleted member 23009]

I felt really cringe as well at first talking about my feelings with myself but it totally works and from what I have read it is most of the reason talk therapy with a therapist works.
Have you considered maybe typing up some of the things you wish to share and handing the therapist your text to read?
I have found this helpful personally as some things are just really hard to say and even after being largely comfortable with my psychologist there are things I do not mention verbally.
I ask my psych if there is anything I should think about during the week at the end of my session.

It is weird I do not know if it will apply to you but we can just flat out not wanting to help ourselves as convinced we will not improve or we do try but stop as well.You could ask if you could get into a therapy that would help you :3
I never mention having SN either as I think they may send people to take it away lolz

Yeah I might try writing things down, I used to for a long time but didn't really share it with anyone. It's easier than talking for sure! I'll be sure to keep that in mind. And the thing about being convinced we will not improve I think applies to a lot of people, maybe even me. Since improving or going through recovery is a long process and there's no quick fix to it.

Thank you for your points, I really appreciate them